Seven years ago, I fell in love with a co-worker. Bad Idea, I know and after just 6 months or so, it ended in an ugly way. At least for me. He had told me all along that he wasn't looking for a realtionshipand it was bad timing. We were both just out of college in one of those crap jobs that we desperately try to get out of... he was right but I didn't listen and got hurt real bad.
Eventually I get the point. When he starts dating another co-worker. So I moved away, moved back, time passed. I forgave him and myself.
But then 8 months ago I met another guy. I had one of the best first dates ever. Was it time to get my hopes up again? Well I guess not. He told me that he felt that relationships had become less important to him and he wanted his freedom. I stopped sleeping with him, but have remained in contact, and sadly I still carried that torch for several months in the secret hope that he'd change his mind. It reminded me of how much self-respect it cost me when this happened 7 years ago.
When 2 weeks ago, who did I run into but t he guy I had thought was so important so long ago. We spoke breifly, exchanged business cards and I figured it was just the emotional kick in the butt I needed to get rid of the latest commitment-phobic peter pan.
I never expected him to actually call me. I never expected him to apologize for mis-treating me so long ago.
I'm not sure where it's heading, but we hung out for hours and I think we really have a shot at being friends this time, first and maybe even see if that spark is still there.
So on the question(s)... Should I ask him what his intentions are?
I'm so terrified of making a fool out of myself by chasing another guy. But so many people wil tell you not to ask pointed questions because it's too intimidating when dealing with a new relationship... But what if it's the same guy from years ago?
Should I give him another chance? Or should I just take this as an opportunity to learn from past mistakes?