Do I have any chance with my ex of 3 years?

This is the first time I write on any forum but I desperately need an answer. Here is my story. My ex girlfriend and I dated for 3 years. We started dating in High school in 11th grade and we had a great relationship. We were each other first everything. Things really started to change once she went away to college which was about 3 hours away from me. Trust issues started to build with me and I was always on top of her asking her what she was doing and where is was going and who was going all the time. I didn't want to lose her so I smothered her with my neediness.

Fast forward and we broke up about 5 months ago after a bad fight and some bad exchange of words. After about a month and a half of no contact we started talking again. it was great we were really got along and during the next 3 months we talked everyday and she agreed to start hanging out with me. Since we lived far away because she was in college she had to stay at my house when she came for the weekend. We hooked up a lot and basically acted like we were dating for the weekends she came over. After about 2 month into talking again I asked her to be with me. She agreed but that only lasted about a week because I started to become needy and clingy again because I felt like I was losing her. I felt that way because she told me she didn't want to talk all the time everyday. So she started talking to me less. I wanted the opposite because I barley saw her. I basically pushed her away by being too needy and we broke up again. She stayed one more weekend after that break up and we still hooked up but she distanced her self a bit from me so we weren't really acting like a couple, more like friends with benefits.

A couple days after that weekend she met a Marine that was at a college art show with some friends. A mutual friend of hers introduced each other and apparently they hit it off and started to talk a lot. We didn't talk for like a week after that and then she told me a couple days after they met she went on a date with him to go hiking and out to dinner. She said she had an amazing time with him and they get along well and have the same personalty. She asked me what I had did during the week we didn't talk. I apparently was vague with my answers. I told her that I just hung out with some friends in the city. She got upset with me because I didn't go into detail about what I did and who i went with. She went on this mini rant about how she thinks im lying and not telling her the truth about what i really did. I was really surprised by this, so i just told her what i did that week. I also asked her if they were a thing and she said "no it wouldn't be practical he is leaving for 2 years." The next day we talked in the morning and then she didn't speak to me all day and ignored my texts and snapchats. Snapchat has this wonderful feature that lets you see where someone is. That night i took a chance and looked at where she was. I come to find out that she was staying at his house and she was there until 1AM. I went bat crazy here and sent her a bunch of snapchats of me going over a story memory scrap book she made for me when we were dating. I said things like "this is our final chapter in our story since you like to go to guys houses that you just met". with that I sent a video of me throwing the book in the trash. She ended up blocking me on snapchat that night. I was furious. The next day i did something I wish I hadn't and drove 3 hours all the way up to her college. On the drive there I calmed myself and figured I should just apologize instead because shes single and she can do what she wants. I bought her a rose and went to her dorm and knocked on the door. No answer. So I waited in my car and texted her saying I was at her dorm and i wanted to apologize. Then thats when she blocked my number. So then I message her on social media and she blocked me on everything. I was confused as to why she did this and then while i was waiting around she sent her roommate to tell me to leave because she doesn't want to talk to me or they would have to call the campus police. I was shocked and I politely left. She ended up unblocking my phone number and I sent her a text I wish I hadn't. It said that I didn't deserve what she did to me after she just hurt me and all i wanted to do was talk as friends. She didnt answer back. That was the last time I talked to her.

The marine was here for only 2 weeks on holiday. During the 2 weeks she hung out with him basically everyday and before he left for his 2 year development to Japan. My ex met his family and they started a relationship all within those 2 weeks. She still has me blocked on all social media but my friend sent me a post my ex put on Instagram. It was a goodbye post to him and it was photos of them together. She also put his name in her bio with a heart next to it. Hes gone now and wont come back for a very long time.

She isnt the type of girl to get into a relationship if she doesn't actually like the person. It really seems like she going through with this LDR with this marine shes only known for 2 weeks and they seem really happy with each other. I know I need to work on myself and become a better man and do no contact. I also know that when/if I do start talking to her i need to take things slow. But what I would like to know is if I have any chance in the future of getting back with my ex after not talking for a couple of months? How do I approach her if she has me still blocked on all social media in the future? And what the hell does this new relationship with the marine mean, is it just a rebound?

Thank you all

The relationship could be just a rebound, but I think your relationship with her is over. She's at college and she's going to meet a lot of interesting people over the next three years. Your jealousy has gotten you into trouble before and caused the break up. You're just not going to be able to handle the remaining time. I mean, threatening to call the police on you is pretty serious. I think you should stop bothering her and move on. See if some of your high school friends are single.

I agree with DanZee.

High school romances more often than not don't survive the transition into adulthood. One or both parties is simply too young and inexperienced to settle down, and university offers a world of opportunities. You two shared a special relationship but it's probably run its course for her.

I don't think her Marine is necessarily a rebound, since she is the one who wanted out of your relationship. That doesn't mean it will last, mind you, but she didn't turn to him for the same reasons that many rebounders turn to the nearest available person. It's better that you stay out of contact, since I doubt you want to her about her new boyfriend. If she keeps you blocked, you need to assume that she isn't interested in talking to you - thus, you can't really go about reconciling unless and until she indicates she wants to open communication again.

Honestly, though, I would take this space to work on your impulse control and jealousy. Tracking her whereabouts online and sending punitive messages was way out of line. I get that you were hurt, but she wasn't your girlfriend anymore. She was free to see whomever she wanted. Likewise for driving to her unannounced and uninvited. It just wasn't a good idea at all under the circumstances. Thinking rationally before acting will serve you well in your next relationship.

Thanks for the advice. Me and my ex have gone through something like this in the past we both were kind of the jealous type but she grew out of it and I actually did too for a little bit but it came back after we broke up for some reason. I now realize that I was too needy and I pushed her away. But do you think that after a couple months of no contact would it be wrong to reach out to her? I’m working on myself now to not be a needy clingy person and not to depend on another person. that’s basically what she wanted from me but I was too attached to give it to her. We have a lot of history together I just need some help on how to approach her in the future because I feel deep down she wants something to do with me but not with the person I am right now

How specifically are you "working on" your extreme jealousy and impulse control issues?

When I mean I’m working on theses things, it’s pretty much mental work. I’ve talk to her almost every day for 4 years. And now that im not I wouldn’t have to worry about what she’s up to and I can have some time to myself to think about why I would need to worry about somebody and what they are doing. If I’m in a relationship with somebody I should just trust them to do the right thing because they’re doing the same for me. And if she’s with somebody when we’re not dating everyone’s going to have a little bit of jealousy but I’m just going to back off and not act on anything. I really don’t have an extreme impulse control that was just something that I did. And Im usually am pretty rational person and i do think before I act. but this was the first time I saw the person I love with another guy so my mind was everywhere and I acted on it. At the time I thought right thing to do and try to apologize. Either way I would just like to know after some time passes what should someone in my situation do. She isn’t the type to reach out to me after a fight if I messed it up. It’s been like that our whole relationship and I’ve gotten her back from pervious break ups before by being the first one to talk to her. This situation is very different and I need to approach it very cautiously but I need some time apart from her so I can think and be myself again. But I would like to know how someone could approach this in the future to start talking as friends and take it from there.

I think you shouldn't worry about trying to restart a friendship with her unless and until she is single again. There's really no point, as your ultimate goal is reconciliation. Reestablishing contact when her heart and mind are with someone else won't get you anywhere.

Also, while jealousy and neediness are certainly a turn-off, I also am not convinced that's the only reason this ended. It sounds like she was losing interest in general, which is often what happens when you start dating someone at a young age and enter adulthood. I would absolutely still encourage you to work on yourself, but do so for you. That way, even if you two have met your natural end of your story together, you will be better-equipped for future relationships.