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Thread: Post here instead of contacting your ex!

  1. #19371
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Posts
    41
    You non communicating ass wipe. Im not chasing you anymore for validation your non emotional responses made me sick to my stomach. I didnt deserve communication let you tell it..you think you gods gift to women..boy i bet you didn't think i would cut your ass off like I said im not an emotional fool..chopped for the best

  2. #19372
    Gold Member Capttrae's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    856
    So yea I had a dream about you last night. It was us the way we should be, not us how we are now.

  3. #19373
    Member Skylark89's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    110
    I hope you're doing well. I don't wish you any ill will. Whatever is going on with you, I hope you figure it out. I truly wish the best for you.
    I miss talking to you, but I'm not letting it get to me anymore. It's too bad you acted immaturely. We could've talked things out...like adults do! ( ¨_¨)
    What you did was harsh and mean. You really hurt me. (੭ ˃̣̣̥ ﹏˂̣̣̥)੭ु I guess time really does mend things. (I knew that, but.....) I've been working really hard to move on.

    Every once in a while, I think about things. I miss the times we hung out. I miss seeing you...hearing your voice. Certain things make me think of you. While it makes me sad, I try to look back fondly. I still wonder if I was a rebound. You said I wasn't, but it's hard to believe that. I feel like I was a rebound or temporary replacement.
    You seem to have a lot of things you need to work through. I know I have my own things to deal with, as well. Let's work hard for the future.

    As for me, I had an awesome birthday!!!!! It was so much fun!!!!
    I got to hang out with someone new too! ( ̄︶ ̄)
    I'm really doing great. ( ̄ー ̄)

  4. #19374
    Bronze Member
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    Sep 2012
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    289
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    I wish I could speak to you but I know itís not gonna help. Iím just feeling sorry for myself. I realise now that trying to forget about you by hooking up with other girls is just stupid. Itís just made me feel dirty and like a creep. It isnít rewarding at all. Maybe itís being so far from home thatís making me feel lonelier and so Iím seeking a physical closeness with whoever. Anyway, I guess you wouldnít need to hear any of that. Itís just for all your faults I feel like you did make me a better person when I was around you. Even if it was just to counter your negativity. Maybe it made me forget my own?

    Itís weird how we just donít talk at all now. I mean before the break up we didnít speak much any way because you were so busy but itís weird how the connection cut so suddenly. I should be grateful to you for not contacting me but another pathetic part of me still finds myself hoping to get a message from you. No idea what Iíd want you to say though.

    I thought Iíd be more mature by this point but I feel like Iím going off the rails a little here. I need to give my head a shake. Iím gonna lose friends on top of losing you. I dunno if the damage is already done or what.

    I guess I just want to know if youíre okay. ... annnd I guess itíd be nice to know if you missed me. Although judging from how callously you could speak about your exes to me I doubt youíre in that bad of a shape. You never were the sentimental type.

    Even though we didnít live together, seeing you every couple of weeks was something to look forward to. Now Iím just coming home to an empty house and combating the loneliness by heading to the bar on the weekends. That poor bartender has to listen to my problems all the damn time in my less than perfect Japanese. Hey, itís all practice though right? I owe what skill I do have in the language to you at the very least.

    Iím rambling like hell. My thoughts are kind of disorganised now. Speaking to you would put things in perspective sometimes. Like I said, I think Iím just especially low because of how woman crazy Iíve been lately. I need to reel that in. Stop drinking so much. Ugh what a mess.

    It was for the best we broke up. No doubt about that. But I do miss you.

  5.  

  6. #19375
    Member
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    Aug 2019
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    50
    I miss you so much

  7. #19376
    Bronze Member
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    Apr 2018
    Posts
    149
    It's been really therapeutic for me to vent on thia post for the last year and a half. This forum has served as a digital diary of sorts. And it had really helped me to get those unspoken things out of my spirit.

    The downside to all of it is that it keeps me from moving forward and having a healthy new relationship. I have posted here when I was bored and between conquests- but I am too old for that foolishness now. I have too much too lose these days, which is why I rejected your attempts to reconcile. You are more trouble than what it's even worth. Read that last line again.

    And a lot of your other exes agree with me on that. Because you have been dumped by countless women. Your body count is high as hell. These women dont want your ass. With everything you got, you STILL get dumped often. Why? Because despite your nice economic situation, you still arent worth 2 dead flies and they know it. Just like I know it. You think you're such an amazing person, so why doesnt anyone else see it?? Hahaha

    A needy, clingy borderline cutting you off and going full no contact speaks VOLUMES. As a bpd, we tend to tolerate less than what we deserve --because of our self worth issues and desperation to be loved. Well I got tired of "crumbs" of affection, laced with criticisms, physical abuse and constant put downs. Besides, the crumbs NEVER taste good as the whole loaf, that's a fact. I want the whole damn loaf or I want none at all.

    So for a "BORDERLINE" to realize that SHES BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU and that she can do "better"than you-- has to really crush that fragile ego of yours. I mean, after all, you have your county pension, city job, your locksmith business, all these boats and vehicles, and that nice ass house-- and yet, the "welfare " with a bunch of kids don't even want you. You really ARE a crappy individual if a borderline doesnt even want you. I mean damn, that's says a lot about you as a person.

    What's crazy is, I spent 20 years with a broke, cheating, toothless, lying dog ass dude that could never keep a job and support me and our kids--- decades longer than I could tolerate YOU. It wasnt just the great sex either- he just wasnt as hateful, cruel, demonic and barbaric as you.

    Looks like you lied about your ex Adrian, and you lied about many other things. I'm not even worried about it though: for all the gaslighting (my exes penis pic)lying and manipulating you did to me-- I did it to you a hundred times over. Some of which you'll never know about.

    I triangulated you with Faulkner, with Ricardo, and my ex husband interchangeably-between the physical beatings you inflicted on me. I couldn't fight you back physically, but I passive aggressively got my revenge all while we were together, through these men. I didnt sleep with any of them except my ex husband, but you knew that and tolerated it because we "both" knew you were sleeping around too. I knew, I just didnt care.

    So when you finally realized that I saw through your bullsh**, you became determined to destroy me and make me jealous. You named dropped "Angela" and the woman with the Mercedes trying to make me jealous- but I didnt care what you did or with who because, unknown to you, I already had one foot out the relationship. I was ready to get back to business as usual with my ex husband at that time. And you cannot make someone jealous that doesnt want you boo.

    So when you really started torturing me mentally and leaving me alone for long periods of time, thinking that I would compete for you and chase you- I used that as an opportunity to exit stage left. When you came back around, I just wanted distance from you and your abuse. When you asked, "if you dont want me to call you anymore, just say it" I saw an exit and walked right through it. And that was that. I had my life back as it was before you came along.

    So reaching out to my archenemy, and telling her what I said, could never hurt me i had been away from April for 3 years- and I didnt talk about her to anyone but you, back then when all that was going on and even this year. So when she started making contact, I knew that your hateful, baldhead, small d*** having ass was behind it. So I played cool and pretended to be okay with being "civil."

    Because I know this vindictive female is dangerous, just like YOU are vindictive and dangerous. Make no mistakes, I'll never trust her again. She wont ever come to my house, or get close to me again. Just like you wont!! But I can speak in passing, a quick hello before disappearing. At least she can get that, you wont ever get a hello from me again. So keep living a lie. You gaslight people to hide from the truth. Who wants a man that lives in a fantasy world of his creation, where hes perfect and everyone else is not? You are all smoke and mirrors. An illusion. You wear different masks to use women for what you want, while offering nothing.

    That all being said, my ex husband has a new woman and a new life. If he can find love, I know I can. Besides, you've enjoyed logging in here and reading what I've said about you. It makes you feel relevant and important, and that's the last thing I want to do. And it holds me back from healing and getting your hateful spirit out of my memory. For a much as I once loved you, I dont care if you live or die.

    Trust and believe, I will never trust you again. You are an enemy, and April is one too, despite having her daughters baby shower on my birthday. (Yes she did that to prove her fake love to me, which i saw right through) and you can tell her that i said that too, while you're at it. I got a "second" pair of handcuffs waiting for her as soon as she gets out of line. And that second pair of handcuffs is easier to get, remember?
    Last edited by smJackson; 10-16-2019 at 04:37 AM.


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