SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 The apartment is in my name so this is not good. He started bleeding and then I started to scream and cry, I lunged at him and he slammed me down on the floor and then I got up and then he slammed me down on the bed and held my leg and called me a bit** telling me he would break it. He never called me a name before. I begged him to stay again.. I feel awful. I'm confused. He's changing into a different person. I can't post my URL to my other post explaining my story because the website won't allow it but its in Breaking Up. I can't leave this relationship for some reason. I feel like he is the only one for me and I will be alone. What should I do? I'm so lost Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 The apartment is in my name so this is not good. He started bleeding and then I started to scream and cry, I lunged at him and he slammed me down on the floor and then I got up and then he slammed me down on the bed and held my leg and called me a bit** telling me he would break it. He never called me a name before. I begged him to stay again.. I feel awful. I'm confused. He's changing into a different person. I can't post my URL to my other post explaining my story because the website won't allow it but its in Breaking Up. I can't leave this relationship for some reason. I feel like he is the only one for me and I will be alone. What should I do? I'm so lost Run, don't walk as far away from him as your legs (thankfully not broken) will carry you. Link to comment
indierockgrl Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 how long have you been together? It doesnt sound like the healthiest relationship... it sounds like it could be becoming more violent. I was in a relationship for 8 years and it ended by me calling the police and filing a restraining order. It had never been rocky before but being ripped out of bed and thrown on the floor so violently was enough for me. I think you need to get away from him even if its just for you to evaluate your situation. It shouldnt be like that..... that is scary. I know... i was there. please think of yourself first.... maybe its time for some space and some time for reevaluation.... Link to comment
SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 We have been together for 6 years. I thought we were supposed to be together forever but I don't know anymore. I feel like if I was a better person and not so argumentative then this stuff wouldn't happen. I hate myself. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 someone you fight with like this is not for you. get out now. this isn't something that just stops. Link to comment
agape-mama Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 I agree entirely - you need to Get Away from him!!! Abuse is NEVER ok. If it's happened once, it will happen again. You deserve much better than that - and you won't be alone forever... Link to comment
LittleLost Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 I can't leave this relationship for some reason. I feel like he is the only one for me and I will be alone. What should I do? I'm so lost This is not true. You know it's not true. There are enough men in the world and I'm pretty positive he is scum and you deserve better. What is true, though, is that this relationship just got really bad. You must leave and not go back. He said he was going to break your leg. He punched a hole in the wall. He shoved you. This is not normal. This is not healthy. This is not going to end well for you. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 We have been together for 6 years. I thought we were supposed to be together forever but I don't know anymore. I feel like if I was a better person and not so argumentative then this stuff wouldn't happen. I hate myself. Wow, you have no self-esteem. No wonder you're even here wondering whether to leave the abusive douchebag. You need to get away from him and then do some serious soul-searching. I mean, if you don't care about yourself, and hate yourself as you say, why should anyone else care about you or treat you right? Link to comment
SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 He called and said that he is leaving me, I can't breath. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 He called and said that he is leaving me, I can't breath. Good!!! That is a good thing! Now you can move on and rediscover all the wonderful things there are to enjoy and respect and love about yourself! Link to comment
rocio Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Go to wal-mart and pick up some drywall mud, sandpaper and paint to match your wall. Fixing the hole will distract you from hyperventilating. Once you've cleaned up the mess he caused to your apartment, you can concentrate on cleaning up the mess he made in you. Link to comment
avman Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 I think you'll find him leaving is the best thing ever to have happened to you. People don't deal with their problems in healthy relationships by punching holes in walls and abusing each other. Get OUT of this relationship. Link to comment
indierockgrl Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 girl.. you are going to be ok... he sounds like an ahole... you have no self esteem.. but you know what, him breaking this off did you a favor. You WILL be ok. I promise you that.... i was in the same situation... I am the most independent i have ever been in my life. You can know focus on yourself.. Screw him... Tell him good riddance... you may not see it now but honey, you will... i promise you!!!!! Link to comment
girl68 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 We have been together for 6 years. I thought we were supposed to be together forever but I don't know anymore. I feel like if I was a better person and not so argumentative then this stuff wouldn't happen. I hate myself. Classic line used by the abused. Get out, his true colors are shining. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 He called and said that he is leaving me, I can't breath. This is the BEST thing that could EVER happen to you. Make sure he stays gone!! Pick yourself up, get your esteem back and find a good man. Link to comment
thejigsup Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 He just did you a favor. NO ONE deserves to be hit or threatened, NO ONE! He will probably kill you one day if you don't get away from him. I've buried a friend of mine who didn't break up with a guy because she was afraid she would never find another guy. She was right, she couldn't. SHE WAS DEAD! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 He just did you a favor. NO ONE deserves to be hit or threatened, NO ONE! He will probably kill you one day if you don't get away from him. I've buried a friend of mine who didn't break up with a guy because she was afraid she would never find another guy. She was right, she couldn't. SHE WAS DEAD! I have to second that, my mom's best friend was killed by her abusive husband. Link to comment
SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 But he has never done that before WHAT IF I PUSHED HIM TO DO THIS? Its not fair I'm so freaking messed up! I don't have a job! He was helping me pay the bills and the last time he left me he stayed with all these drunk people that popped vicodin all day. I don't want him to go back over there. This is so bad right now. Thank you guys for responding to my posts, I have no one else to talk to. My mom knows about him and she is tired of me running and crying to her about everytime he breaks up with me. She doesn't want me to feel bad anymore. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 But he has never done that before WHAT IF I PUSHED HIM TO DO THIS? Its not fair I'm so freaking messed up! I don't have a job! He was helping me pay the bills and the last time he left me he stayed with all these drunk people that popped vicodin all day. I don't want him to go back over there. This is so bad right now. Thank you guys for responding to my posts, I have no one else to talk to. My mom knows about him and she is tired of me running and crying to her about everytime he breaks up with me. She doesn't want me to feel bad anymore. People can drive others to get upset. Yes. But he made a choice to hit you, and threaten to break your leg. No, you need to move on. Link to comment
avman Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Listen to me closely. You did not push him to become violent. He always has another choice and that is to leave, to use words, to go cool down, and so on. There are lots of options. But he chose to attack. And that is HIS issue and not yours. If he chooses to leave to go hang out with pill poppers all day then again that is HIS choice. Do not accept responsibilty for his decisions. He is a big boy and he can accept his own consequences. Link to comment
SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 What if I pushed him first? Then is it my fault? Sometimes he gets really drunk and starts pacing around the room and spazzing out? What does that mean? I'm sorry if I sound dumb, I'm just trying to understand. Does that mean he hates me and I make him crazy and he's only staying just to stay? Link to comment
SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 Why was my post moved to abuse and violence? How can I be abused when I started it? Link to comment
laisla Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 it means he has issues with violence. it does not mean he loves you/does not love you/hates you/does not hate you. it means he's got issues and you're not safe with him. Link to comment
SC1607308020 Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 I'm starting to scare myself, do I sound like those abused women who don't believe they are abused? Link to comment
avman Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 I'm starting to scare myself, do I sound like those abused women who don't believe they are abused? Yes, you do. And I moved your post to Abuse and Violence. That is exactly where this post belongs. It is clearly abuse. Link to comment
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