Relatively Good Times: Transforming Stressful Situations in Life

If you feel overwhelmed and hopeless because of a situation in which you’re drowning in stress and don’t have any escape from it—you're not alone. Most of us have experienced at least once when one single situation became unmanageable and uncontrollable, feeling like there's no way out. If you are currently in such a situation and search for solutions to relieve the pressure and clear a path ahead of you, the answer lies within you. You can break free of your predicaments yourself and make those “relatively good times” happen again.

The first step is to identify and become aware of how you got into this stressful situation in the first place. Take a step back and look at the problem from a distance, instead of trying to solve it immediately. Looking at your problem objectively will give some insights and help you address the underlying issues or find potential solutions. For instance, if you had an argument with your partner and felt extremely stressed about it, instead of focusing strictly on what happened, try to think through why such words were uttered and how to avoid similar fights in the future. Doing so can help both of you move on with the relationship without any resentments and bitterness.

After having identified the cause, take a deep breath and remember that every storm eventually passes. Recognizing and accepting our suffering should always be the first step—making peace with it instead of putting all our strength into fighting it does really help. We need to pay attention to our situation to know if it worths stirring something up or if it's better to just let it be and accept it. And if we decide to fight, taking a step back and acting with greater awareness is a much better option than blindly rushing into fights.

We cannot control the things that happen to us but we can choose how we respond to them. Speak to trusted people and seek a support group, whether it's friends and family or professionals. Go out, enjoy some nature, exercise, and reflect; these activities send your brain signals that you’ve left “stress zone” and you’re opening some breathing space to get work done.

Take time for yourself and do whatever can help to reduce your overall agitation—practice yoga, listen to slow music, go for a long walk, take a nap. Do something that relaxes and calms you down and then you can quickly learn to put the adversities of life in proper perspective, reducing the opportunities of being overwhelmed by stress. To do this, focus on what you can actually achieve and control. Having something tangible to do and deal with makes our situation less abstract and harder to catastrophize. And if something doesn’t work as initially planned, there’s no reason to lose all hope. Take the failure and lessons it has brought along, and move forward.

Finally, show the same kindness to yourself like you would to someone you care about. Every difficult situation tests us and, eventually, reveals certain character attributes that we can take pride in, so always be kind to yourself no matter what. Reward yourself for the little accomplishments you make along the path and change your attitude towards the situation following a silver-lining kind of approach.

It’s essential to remember that although stressful situations can seem overwhelming, they make us stronger individuals in a long run and teach us how to communicate better and manage our response even better. With the right perspective, mind set, and courage, we can turn tremendously difficult times into “relatively good times”.