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  • Matthew Frank
    Matthew Frank

    Finding Compassion in an Ex-Partnerships' Vicissitude

    Vicissitude is a trying element of partnerships. Even years after the end of a relationship, the effects are sometimes pervasive and bring strife or sadness. When difficulties arise with called partners, it can be hard to navigate and process complex emotions. While it’s no one’s fault, the confusion, hurt or frustration felt by this situation can be exhausting. Here is some advice on how to handle the experience of dealing with an ex-girlfriend while communing with compassion.

    When difficulties with an ex-girlfriend arise, it’s important to take care of yourself first. Setting limits and boundaries is an integral part of moving forward. Doing what makes you feel safe and secure, such as maintaining contact at a level that is comfortable for you, can prevent any anxiety stemming from doubts about where the relationship stands. Establishing firm, but considerate lines of communication is pivotal in managing the situation, so agree upon how and when to touch base.

    In this vein, effective communication skills should always be exercised. Refrain from persistent attempts to contact someone if they deny or resist pursuing further engagement. Talk, explain, and listen without blame or aggression. Even if it's difficult to reach an agreement, being clear and practicing trust will help provide a foundation for understanding. Try and remain open-minded if things don't go exactly as planned and exercise patience when attempting to connect. In the event of a misunderstanding or miscommunication, remain calm and apologize for missteps if necessary.

    It’s okay to have complicated feelings during times of stress, which include the desire for reconciliation and the strength to move on. Ambivalent emotions are valid, even if it is confusing. Recognizing these internal conflicts can help notice patterns within the relationship and make more informed decisions. Refusing to linger in pain, guilt, or bitterness is helpful in managing expectations of the ex-girlfriend while giving yourself closure.

    It’s hard to let go of people and tough situations, so lean on supportive friends, family or professionals to find solace in the grieving process. Knowing you’re not alone in your struggle will aid your path to the next chapter. Find hope and understanding with the understanding that experiencing different kinds of joy and success await you further down the line.

    A breakup is difficult to cope with and establishing life after that event can test one’s courage and resilience. Take steps to making sure you’re emotionally and mentally prepared to handle the weaknesses of partnering. Reassess your behaviors and reevaluate what standards and values are meaningful in curating a healthy future relationship. Exploring and connecting with everything a new relationship has to offer will help in processing the trauma of the old.

    In the wild ride of partnership, seeking perspective and self-healing are recovery’s mainstays. No matter the difficulties and pains associated with a heartache, there is solace in the comfort of understanding. With effective communication and self-compassion, emerging from a sticky situation with an ex-girlfriend can be done by allowing yourself to heal and grow.

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