How Can I Trust My Cheating Boyfriend Again?

Dear eNotAlone: I'm writing to find some advice and help. My boyfriend is cheating on me. We started seeing each other over a year ago and were so in love but have grown apart recently. He keeps telling me he loves me and that he wants to be with me, but things just don't feel the same. I recently found out from a couple of his friends that he's been sleeping around. I was so shocked and hurt by this. I just don't know what to do. How can I trust him again? Should I break up with him or try and work things out? I'm so confused and scared. Any help on the matter would be appreciated. - A Hurting Heart

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Dear A Hurting Heart,

First of all, I want to acknowledge how difficult it must be to learn that your partner has been unfaithful. It sounds like this has shattered your trust and left you debating what to do moving forward.

When relationships are based on mistrust and betrayal, it can be difficult to rebuild the relationship. Your wellbeing needs to be top priority, so you should consider all your options carefully before making a decision.

Although it can be hard to think objectively when your emotions are involved, it's important to consider why the infidelity has happened in the first place. Try to be honest with yourself about whether the current level of trust in your relationship is adequate for it to continue, whatever choice you make.

It could be that, after careful consideration, you decide to try and repair the relationship. This would likely involve open and honest discussions around your feelings around the hurt inflicted and your expectations for the relationship going forward. This won't be easy, but it may be possible if both of you are committed to the process.

Alternatively, you may decide to end the relationship. Depending on the dynamics of your relationship and the damage done, it might not be possible to remain friends. It might be easier to maintain a pleasant distance to avoid any tension between you.

No matter what you decide to do, remember to take things slowly, be kind to yourself and make self-care a priority. Seek out support from friends and family who you can talk to and lean on during this difficult time.