Ex trying hard to get me back then cancells date

Ex and i have been NC for 3 months, we talked again after he came back full force , Invites me out tonight but last minute calls and cancels date, he wanted to reschedule tomorrow i told him i could not ! Then i simply told him i had to go and hung up. He probably had other plans with someone else., he pretends hes so in love with me then he turns things around and acts like a total jerk. I know NC , blocking is all i can do but it still hurts like hell. Please why does someone act one way then turn things around??

"He probably had other plans with someone else., he pretends hes so in love with me then he turns things around and acts like a total jerk"

- If YOU know he's like this, why do YOU keep giving in?

Are you even sure of why he cancelled out? With hanging up in frustration like that, doesn't sound like you gave him much of a chance.

"He probably had other plans with someone else., he pretends hes so in love with me then he turns things around and acts like a total jerk"

- If YOU know he's like this, why do YOU keep giving in?

 

Are you even sure of why he cancelled out? With hanging up in frustration like that, doesn't sound like you gave him much of a chance.

I did hang up because i knew in his voice he was lying. If he was so interested in seeing me today like he acted all week why cancell??? so easy to try and reschedule , i didnt feel he was honest at all.

My ex did this all the time after we broke up!! He would make an arrangement then give very short notice to cancel. He could be doing a number of things like simply seeing if you will go out with him, c_ckblocking you from going out with other people, or simply had a better offer.

Personally, I must have agreed to go out with my ex 5 times before I caught on...kept canceling! If your ex actually wants you he would never cancel. He'd cancel with the other person or include you. He is game-playing. Don't let him!

My ex did this all the time after we broke up!! He would make an arrangement then give very short notice to cancel. He could be doing a number of things like simply seeing if you will go out with him, c_ckblocking you from going out with other people, or simply had a better offer.

 

Personally, I must have agreed to go out with my ex 5 times before I caught on...kept canceling! If your ex actually wants you he would never cancel. He'd cancel with the other person or include you. He is game-playing. Don't let him!

Hes sick, even if hes with someone else and cannot commit to see me on weekends, ( i told him i could only date weekends) why make plans ?? talk about it all week, if hes trying to make things work with me why freaking cancel?? i actually feel sorry for who ever hes spending time with, comes monday he will pursue me like crazy.all i can say hes a A-HOLE !!!

Ex and i have been NC for 3 months, we talked again after he came back full force , Invites me out tonight but last minute calls and cancels date, he wanted to reschedule tomorrow i told him i could not ! Then i simply told him i had to go and hung up. He probably had other plans with someone else., he pretends hes so in love with me then he turns things around and acts like a total jerk. I know NC , blocking is all i can do but it still hurts like hell. Please why does someone act one way then turn things around??

Why do you want to see him?

Why do you want to see him?

Because we have a great time together. Because i have feelings for him.

They act like that because sometimes they only want you when they don't have you. Once they think they've got it and you in the bag, they are no longer interested and/or the game playing of "Let's see how badly she wants me" kicks in.

You did good. I wouldn't bother with answering him ever again. After a certain point you know what they're going to do and it just becomes stupid to keep playing a game no one wins at. Block, delete, go back to NC. It hurts, but it is what it is and he is .who he is.

If he is sick, he wont stop doing this. My ex did it when he know my father was dying of cancer....He would make a plan, I would be at the hospital all day, then he would cancel. I used to go in side my car and scream. Sick people are capable of this. If you are an unsuspecting person don't allow him to dupe you over and over again.

Because we have a great time together. Because i have feelings for him.

But are the good times together worth this feeling? I know what you're going through, truly. It will feel so much better when you have feelings for someone you have a great time with, who never bails on you or gives you reasons not to trust him. That guy's out there. This guy's just a waste of energy in your life right now.

Hurts to be fooled. I will be ok because i have the power of blocking him and going NC. the problem is i have a feeling he has someone else and still wants to keep me around. Thats what i dont understand. I have and had no plans of getting physical with him because then he would have the upper hand. I thought by maybe only seeing him on weekends and dates then maybe we could work out things. Guess the first weekend proved it wrong.

mg...It's not going to be any different this time around. Are you sure you're up for this again?

mg...It's not going to be any different this time around. Are you sure you're up for this again?

Agreed. You've posted many times on here about what a messed-up person he is. Why put yourself through this again? He hasn't changed. I can assure you. Don't you deserve better than this?

Read "Men Who Can't Love" and it will explain everything.

They want you badly until you say yes, and then they become very afraid (of love, intimacy, commitment) and they simply cannot move forward into the relationship. They cancel plans incessantly even after they've been chasing you for months. It will drive you batty. Has nothing to do with you.

Please stay far away from this guy if you want to be happy. You deserve so much better than this. He is screwed up, but likely very seductive, charming and charismatic. They all are. Just accept it and let him go. He is not going to change.

I don't think a book is necessary. If someone cancels especially more than once without a very good excuse and a very sincere apology why bother. Another common sense piece -if you don't trust a person, don't get involved with that person.

I don't think a book is necessary. If someone cancels especially more than once without a very good excuse and a very sincere apology why bother. Another common sense piece -if you don't trust a person, don't get involved with that person.

I never heard his excuse, and I didn't ask. I quickly just said I was busy and needed to go and hung up the phone. At 2:00am he called me of course I didn't answer. If someone really wants to be with you they will make every effort on earth to do so. Iam sure today he will beg and plead to see me. His phone call last night at 2:00 am only proved to be either his night didn't go well or he actually felt guilty.

Maybe it's time to take a look at why you are attracted to a disfunctional man? I still have feelings for the disfunctional Ex that brought me to this site 4 years ago but I would never entertain dating her again. I went and worked on myself and got healthy and now want nothing to do with her. This is more about you than him.

It isn't about him wanting to get back...or he would follow through.

It is about him wanting to verify YOU still want him...and ego stroke.

So when you say "yes" he gets his fix...and goes on his merry way.

The 2am call isn't because he feels guilty. It is to verify your whereabouts...because he is done with his night, and hopes you are home alone brooding.

This is about control...and it is high time you took back control of your emotions and life. Stop handing it off to him.