Is he abusing my dog?

[TheRedQueen]

Hell, yes, he's abusing your dog!

 

I'm sorry, but I almost burst into tears reading your thread. Please, I beg you...if you won't leave this man, at least find a loving and safe home for that defenseless little beagle.

I couldn't agree more. Either kick your bf to the curb, or find your dog a loving home. (though hopefully you'll choose the former, and not the latter)

[Bethany]

I think it is wrong to generalize. Even though there are some sick people out there, not everyone should be tarred with their brush.

I have a large German Shepherd, so if your theory was completely correct that would make me inclined to 'police' my local area, which is insane. My dog was 'Free to a good home' and indeed he hit lucky and has a good home and is very much loved.

But I do agree tha this bf shouldn't have hit the dog, dogs learn nothing but fear from a beating and it should never have happened. But if you train your dog from day one, a problem like this would not have arised, unless of course the dog is mentally deranged or the bf he is genuinely sick in the head and has pyschopathic tendancies.

 

And I would like to bring up the perils of treating a dog like a baby or a child, and I do understand and sympathise with the OP and I think this dog TV program in the UK hits on the problems that 'mommies' who love their 'babies' can face in the future... I recommend checking out (despite the annoying adverts) Series 2 - Ben, Tallulah, Bailey,and Rex.

 

link removed

 

NONE of these dogs have been beaten and all have been 'mommied' or 'daddied' at some point and most are thought to be cute and cuddly.

There was no hope for some of these dogs and some were going to be put down becuase of their behavioural problems but ALL these dogs have been helped or 'cured' by the dog trainer featured in the program I am pleased to say.

[Siriana]

Oh, I am soooo late on this thread.

Yes, that little biggle is untrained and spoilt. That's the fact. And they are full of energy, very curious breed.

You need to train that dog.

I suggest attending some school for dogs and excercizing to be more an owner than being owned.

 

Now back to your partner.

My bf has awfully untrained but cute dog. Also the one for hunting group, sooo you get the point. And yes, that dog can get soooo annoying.

No matter what I would never, never, never hit an animal. There are other ways of teaching them.

Sometimes I would like to freeze that dog to stay on one place just for a second...I don't like dogs as much as I love cats, but again I would never hurt that little guy.

You can't put animal trough fear or pain, those cute eyes and face and ears...even when they do something horrible you can't torture them.

So looks like mr. perfect has a short temper.

 

I have this opinion based on experience - people who make animals hurt are awfull people.

They are always capable to emotionaly abuse human being.

Also i suspect he should be able to deal with your spoilt dog better -the only right thing would be him asking you to train the dog.

 

Why did you let him ditch your doog from house out?!

The only correct thing would be to train the dog.

Of course dog is acting weird - he was adored before (too mcuh, so because of that awfully spoilt) ,and now he's neglected and aboused by another person while you let that happen.

 

 

ONE MORE THING finding home for a biggle is a crappy solution and a very inconsiderate one.

He abused the dog, but instead sending him to hell you give away the dog?!

No way.

Thats immature way of dealing with things.

You need to train that dog (if he's not already too much traumatized), see a vet to check up his health and move out.

Charlie said right -You heard him abusing the dog and you didn't confront him! that was a huge sign you know he might be dangerous toward you.

How can you sit quietly when someone is abusing your child?! And you don't confront the person.

 

If someone touched my animal - he would be in the past.

[Dilly]

I have not read the entire thread - but would like to say that if you do not stand up to your boyfriend over this, he WILL continue. I have been in this situatin before and it escalated to the point where my ex- pulled a gun on my dog. I became hysterical and that forced me into rethinking the relationship. He eventually began to be a very good daddy to the dogs, but I never fully recovered from the event and my love for this man eventually became so sparse that I left the relationship. I also think that had I not made a big deal of his disciplinary modes, my ex- would have continued being a bad "dad" and now, he is very good at it I gather. I feel that a man who abuses a dog, has unfathomable aggressive tendencies and should not be trusted until he acknowledges his aggressions as bad behavior. Riley deserves better.

[longhaircats]

I have two adorable cats that I absolutory love (yes, they have longhair They are just like my family. They come to my bed and lick my face whenever I am sad or down. They may be not as intelligent as human, but they have ability to sense these human emotions and feelings. I can not imagine not having them in my life. I’m already scared because cats only live 15-18 years and someday I will have to face the reality.

 

When my ex boyfriend and I were living together, he treated them well with a lot of love, but when we split, he told me that he would have no problems if something bad happen to them and never see them again. He didn't abuse them, but I couldn't help but wonder if his love toward them was a fake. I realized now why he is my ex.

[charley]

I think it is wrong to generalize. Even though there are some sick people out there, not everyone should be tarred with their brush.

I have a large German Shepherd, so if your theory was completely correct that would make me inclined to 'police' my local area, which is insane. My dog was 'Free to a good home' and indeed he hit lucky and has a good home and is very much loved.

But I do agree tha this bf shouldn't have hit the dog, dogs learn nothing but fear from a beating and it should never have happened. But if you train your dog from day one, a problem like this would not have arised, unless of course the dog is mentally deranged or the bf he is genuinely sick in the head and has pyschopathic tendancies.

 

Hi Bethany. German Sheperds were bred to protect sheep, humans (their owners), and to be a general all purpose working dog. That means they were bred for intelligence and athletic ability, as well as a reasonable, yet brave temperment. They were NOT bred for killing or to be vicious like a Pit Bull or Rottweiler. It's not the same thing. German Sheperds have the instinct to protect when necessary, not to kill and attack (and continue to attack) whether a threat exists or not. German Sheperds were bred to have judgement about when to use force to protect livestock or their owner. Killer breeds were bred to attack without without provocation and without mercy until death. German Sheperds can be aggressive, but that typically only in defense of themself or their master. Police dogs are bred and trained to subdue people, not kill or maim them. This is completely different than a dog that is bred, and/or trained to attack without provocation and continue until the victom is dead. There is no comparison.

 

If I had any thought about you owning a German Sheperd, it's that you wanted a dog that would protect you, be intelligent, and a good pet. I think you have good judgement. That is entirely different than choosing a killer breed. A German Sheperd is an excellent choice for protection, and they are very nice dogs. They are also intelligent and have reasonably good judgement about when to use force, how much force is need, and when to stop. Part of what they were bred for is intelligence and good judgement. They are excellent dogs.

 

I used to work summers for the humane society when I was in my early twenties and in college. I assisted an officer in the field. Any humane society officer or police office will tell you that I am right to be suspicious of people who own breeds of dogs bred to kill other dogs or attack or kill people. The people who buy those dogs are often people prone to violence, or at the very least they are often prone to bad judgement. Not always, but often. The man described in the original post also displays several other red flags of tendencies towards violence.

 

I don't assume that owners of killer breeds are always bad people, but I do keep a close eye on them for other red flags. When a person shows 2 red flags I'm getting very suspicious. When they show 3 or more, I know they are a bad apple. This man shows many red flags.

 

If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and looks like a duck, it's a duck.

 

Let's also remember what the dog peed on. A punching bag. Innocuous by itself, but when put into context with all the other things, the punching bag is yet another red flag of a guy with violent tendencies or fantasies.

[fortywhatever]

Okay here goes my 2 cents. I have tried to read thru your post several times today but could not do it. It so , so saddens my heart that your boyfriend could be treating that dog the way he does. The dog does not deserve that kind of treatment, what so ever!! When we decide to get a pet consequences go along with it like chewing, potty training etc. Being mean and abusive is no way to treat an animal. I do hope you are brave enough to confront your boyfriend about this matter and he can be more compasionate. Cause you know what............What would happen if one day you become his target, not the dog?

Sorry to sound so mean.....but that's how I feel.

 

That dog trusts you to love it and care for it and will give YOU unconditional love and devotion. Please do something about it!!! NOW!!!!

[Bethany]

They were NOT bred for killing or to be vicious like a Pit Bull or Rottweiler. .

 

I do agree with the Pit Bulls owners breeding for killing and to be vicious but I can't agree with the ALL Rottweiler owners breeding them for killing as I have a few friends who have had them over the years and never used them for such reasons and were family dogs and would lick you to death (and hump your leg ) rather than attack you and would love one myself.

 

A German Sheperd is an excellent choice for protection, and they are very nice dogs. They are also intelligent and have reasonably good judgement about when to use force, how much force is need, and when to stop. Part of what they were bred for is intelligence and good judgement. They are excellent dogs.

 

Agreed. He's fab.

[freedom]

i have read you mail thru and this is what i think (which i pretty sure i am right.)

you love your dog so much that you have babied it to a point where you have neglected to train it properly. You have began to look pass these bad behaviours (claiming that it is your baby and that knowing you can;t have children) to a point where it is spoilt. Of course you love your dog but you or anyone (including your S.O ) doesn't have to out up with a badly behaved dog. (Just like in any human society the parent would say that their children is not to blame for bad behaviour it is a parent that doesn't teach the children CORRECT behaviour.) it looks like your over protectiveness has RE-ENFORCED bad behaviour in your dog.

 

I suppose every little thing that your bf does will make your dog yipe because it knows that it would get a reaction. Dogs are smart little buggers. My dog use to Yipe a scream everytime we comb his hair, it was a drama queen.

 

I do NOT condone you S.O treatment of your dog but i can understand it. He believes he is training your dog, but in my opinion he is doing it incorrectly.

 

What all 4 of you need is training. (ie you, bf, your dog and his dog.)

Watch your behaviour and find out if you are re-enforcing bad behaviour.

[sddeaston]

This, I feel, is an EXTREME generalization.

 

There is this family I am VERY VERY VERY good family friends with. Have been all my life. These people are the kindest, most nurturing people I have ever met. They own three rott's as of right now, and I know of at least 3 others they have owned during the time we have been family.

 

These people would kill someone for harming or being abusive towards ANY animal.

 

Along with this family I know a lot of other rottweiler owners, all of which treat their dogs, as well as other people kindly.

 

I think this is as versatile as any other argument pertaining to things people have that will tell you about them as a person. It is very one-sided.

 

That said, rott's are notorious for being aggressive, that much is definitely true. But no one can tell me that all people who own rotts are aggressive, violent individuals themselves.

[Mrs Elliott Smith]

I don't care how good a man is. If he ever touches my cat (or dog, if I had one), I'd leave him. No questions asked.

 

#1: He IS abusing your dog.

#2: He apparently has anger and self-control issues.

#3: No offense, but he sounds like a major jerk (in more polite terms). I hope he doesn't beat his kid like this.

 

I cannot believe you're actually questioning this situation. Try to avoid going into denial, please, for the sake of your poor dog.

[Mrs Elliott Smith]

He doesn't kick him or punch him upside the head or anything like that.

 

You mean, he doesn't kick him or punch him THAT YOU KNOW OF. Are you always around when your boyfriend is near the dog? Apparently not, if you caught him abusing your dog. I'd be afraid to leave the two of them together.

[MustbeNuts]

I have lurked here forever and thought I would give my own opinion.

 

I WILL start out with this: I in NO way condone any abuse of ANY animal

 

I had a beagle for 11 years. He was my "Baby" he had no training and was very spoiled. I loved him dearly and miss him to this day. My long time boyfriend turned husband also spoiled him. My dog had no concept of pecking order and when a new dog was introduced (A Laborador) he was not overly thrilled with the new arrangements. My dog also went from sleeping on my bed to sleeping in the laundry room. And, like your beagle, snored in Epic Proportions (His snoring made the walls in the house vibrate). As my dog got older, he started to think he was becoming the boss. He got more aggressive and more irritable. If i wanted to grab his food bowl to put more food, or add a treat he would growl at me. This behavior had nothing to do with how I treated him but had EVERYTHING to do with the normal instinct of a dog.

 

Dogs (and I think perhaps this is more evident in pure breeds as apposed to muts) DO establish a pecking order, and just like in the Wild, they will start to try to become top dog IF YOU LET THEM. My dog became very aggressive. I started to worry and actually had him fixed hoping it would calm him down. I was afraid he would snip at someone. Fixing him did not solve the problem. Letting him know i was BOSS did. If he growled at me I would make him lay down and lay on him so he couldnt move. He would struggle with me.. then give up and sit rigidly still. I never hit him never smacked him or yelled. after i let him up he would run to me and snuggle with me. A few times doing this he stopped trying to be "Boss" for awhile. I did this periodically to make it known that I wasnt going to put up with his little tantrums.

 

I do this now with my current dog. I have never hit him or yelled, but every once in awhile I will use the same tactic. With this dog (who is 130 Lbs) he has never tried to be top dog, he is gentle and shows me respect.

 

Ok.. Now I am going to reply about the generalization of dog owners. My sister had a a Rotweiller (spelling?) and this dog was not an aggressive dog nor was she after a dog that would be mean. My sister is the most gentle person I know, so having a general statement that all "mean breed" owners are also "mean" is rediculous. Turn that statement around and I will agree with it. Say this perhaps instead:

 

"Mean people that own animals tend to be drawn to more aggresive dogs"

 

Ok.. on to my last point. No.. the abuse of animals is wrong but you cant just assume that the boyfriend is a bad person. He may not have been raised in a home that feels the way about animals that the majority of you do that respond. Does that make him a bad person? no.. it just means that he needs to be re-educated. If you do not like the way he treats your dog, TELL HIM. Come to a comprimise. We all agree that your dog has no training. So go train your dog AND your boyfriend.

[i1dr]

Always trust a four legged dog over a two legged dog! Dogs can sense things but they can't talk. Grrr. this makes me mad! Imagine what a nightmare it is to be in his spot. for a starter the dogs world is very hierarchical and he being the top dog in his house is vital to him. I think it may be dangerous to him in a real way to not have the respect he needs in front of a much larger dog ... and don't even get me started on you BF. Make him sleep in the basement next time - perhaps he will get a clue about sensitivity to your best friend! Grrr!

[isabellacantinos]

I dont think its THAT bad, I meanwe have 3 dogs at our house so its not that I advocate it but one time I was petsitting this really high maintenance dog for these people and it and our dog got into a fight over food.

 

my stepdad was there and he got so upset he actually KICKED the other dog! I was mortified! but the thing is that he felt pretty bad about afterwords and he really loooves dogs I just think some people were raised to think that dogs needed that kindof "reinforcement"

 

you just need to make it very clear to him that its NOT OK to you and that if he has a problem with your dog then he needs to take it to YOU not the dog

 

but I dont think its as scary as people are making it out to be. its just a sort of cultural kinda thing: some people have these little beliefs about animals that are outdated but can usually be changed if faced directly

 

now if he keeps doing it, then thats a problem...maybe you guys should do doggie relationship therapy

[Bethany]

but I dont think its as scary as people are making it out to be. its just a sort of cultural kinda thing: some people have these little beliefs about animals that are outdated but can usually be changed if faced directly

 

I don't think this 'little belief' as you put it CAN be believed until faced with the reality that it IS as scary as people make it out to be if your not very, very careful....

 

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[trash mail]

it is really funny that because a dog is a victim there is a 10 page responce, when the victim is a human somtimes you dont even get 4

[i1dr]

People usually contribute greatly to their own situations and they have the ability to help themselves. An animal just as a small child does not. To harm them is far more horrible and more telling about the little cretins that harm them than when it happens to adults. The reaction is logical and simple human nature - amongst good people.

[CharlesF]

I know it has been posted before, but this guy is definitely abusing your dog. This is why your dog is snarling at you. It is a bad situation, and I think you need to leave.

 

Also, I really like the response from "trash mail". I remember one time a guy who went to court for abusing a dog. When he cam out, the animal rights people were there to scream at him. Would the same thing happen if he abused a child? Probably not.

[Scout]

Also, I really like the response from "trash mail". I remember one time a guy who went to court for abusing a dog. When he cam out, the animal rights people were there to scream at him. Would the same thing happen if he abused a child? Probably not.

 

Well, for starters, child abuse laws actually carry strong penalties and are enforced. If they weren't, there would be a LOT of people protesting at the court houses when some child abuser gets off with a ridiculously light sentence, and in the few cases where that happens, how do you know there aren't people protesting at those? And how come more people aren't protesting when animal abusers get off with a slap on the wrist? If for no other reason than that people who torture and kill animals often move on to doing the same to humans.

 

At any rate, I wish someone could explain to me why it's automatically assumed that if you are active in animal rights, you could care less about human beings.

 

As an animal rights advocate, I can't tell you how many protests I have attended where some person got in my face and screamed, "Why don't you care about people?"

 

For some reason, animal rights issues really threaten certain people. I just don't get it. Especially when you consider there are far more laws and protection on the books for people than animals.

 

Case in point. Two brothers in Atlanta were recently convicted of torturing a puppy that had trustingly followed them around throughout an apartment complex. They broke into the complex's community center, bound the puppy with duct tape, covered it in paint, and then threw it in an oven where they baked it alive.

 

If they'd done that to a person, they'd have gotten the death penalty.

 

Instead, they got ten years. And a lot of that sentence was because they broke into the community center...not for torturing that helpless puppy.

 

If I had lived in Atlanta, you're damn right I would have been at that courthouse.

[CharlesF]

Probably, people get exercised when animals are abused because they think that animals are allot cuter than kids.

[trash mail]

my opinion is that your dog has bad habits re-enforced by your behavior. Your S.O actions is not appropriate towards your dog, but i recommend that you, your S.o and your dog go see a professional dog traiiner.

[BellaDonna]

I was just wondering: Has this situation with the dog gotten any better?

 

 

BellaDonna

[SummerGirl38]

Well let me say this.. There were 96 people who responded to my question? and in one way or another every 96 of you responded with pretty much the same answer.

 

If that doesn't wake you up, nothing will and to answer your question, things are much better now.

 

After reading about 10 of those responses I went home and confronted him, which he didn't deny. He admitted to spanking Riley for peeing on his punching bag and explained to me that this is how he was raised.

 

I in turn explained to him that he needs to look at Riley as I do his daughter, like a kid, my kid and that I will not stand for any kind of abuse or I will split faster than he can bat an eye.

 

I reminded him that Riley is "his daughters best friend" and if anything ever happened to him. He would be the one to tell her. I also told him that he needs to look at it this way and think how he would feel if I spanked his daughter. I would never dream of it, but neither should he.

 

He told me Riley is bad and he needs training which I can agree. He also

told me that it's not that he doesn't like Riley, but he wishes he wasn't so bullheaded. Riley is as stubborn as a two year old who's not getting his way.

 

I'm happy to say that Riley is now getting that training he needed and is really catching on. My boyfriend even works with him on a nightly basis now and gets excited when Riley gets something new

 

My eyes are still wide open, but so far, all is well.

 

Thanks for asking

[SummerGirl38]

and just another short note to thank all 96 of you for your replies, yeah they hurt and God did I cry but it woke me up. Sometimes you need that.

 

Sloppy dog kisses to all of you, thanks again

Riley & Summergirl38