The One Posted August 24, 2007 Share Posted August 24, 2007 Its been over a month, I don't count the days anymore, I have no reason to contact her, there is nothing that she can contribute to me or my future. I am in NC and would like to keep it going forever. She likes girls, end of story or chance for us ever even talking about reconciling. Good Luck Everyone!!! Link to comment
adore Posted August 25, 2007 Share Posted August 25, 2007 day 29, mutual no contact. for me, it's gotten harder rather than easier in some ways. because after the first week or two i wrongly expected him to get in touch with me. i wasnt' grasping that the relationship was over. so now reality is hitting me, but i'm really proud that i haven't given in. i've been journaling a lot, making plans with friends, etc. no contact is becoming a habit now, and i don't have any major urges to call/write. adore Link to comment
Coyote9 Posted August 26, 2007 Share Posted August 26, 2007 Been about 4.5 months now....I'm able to experience long stretches of time (hours) when I don't think about her at all, but alone or in situations where my memory is triggered I still think about her. NC has become a way of life, and I no longer fear contact (as she's moved on and will not contact me either at this point). I miss the closeness and companionship of our relationship and have not had very good dating experiences thusfar, although I'm trying to see that as more about expanding my network of friends and less about anything terribly romantic at this point, as my ex is still in that spot in my heart and I actually feel worse when I think about a sexual situation with someone other than her still. This stuff just takes time! Link to comment
Benjyh Posted August 27, 2007 Share Posted August 27, 2007 i think im on day 32 maybe more, its a weird feeling, not talking to someone that i couldnt go 1 day without talking too, and now spent over a month and what will continue to be more, times change people change we move on we grow as people as ourselves alone hoping to find someone to pass the time with without getting our hearts broken again. still thinking about my ex too much and i know she is having a much better time then i am these days which makes this so much harder, i do miss her, but i know some things in my life have improved without her, i just wish it hadnt ended like it had. bah i hate feeling like this onwards with NC Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted August 27, 2007 Share Posted August 27, 2007 It's day thirty something of NC... Feels a bit sad to remember how me and him used to talk everyday and now nothing. I am getting along fine though, even though yesterday I had a dream about meeting him and his ex at an airport while on vacation. I guess it's just best not to think of him. I am going to try and redirect my thoughts everytime I start thinking of him. Link to comment
FeignedMischief Posted August 27, 2007 Share Posted August 27, 2007 I am on Day 35 of NO CONTACT. \\ Link to comment
starscollide Posted August 28, 2007 Share Posted August 28, 2007 Well I know exactly how you feel hun.. You are not restricting been so clear as to what you want. Just being honest with yourself and thats a good thing.. Keep going and with you all the way... Andy I was...lol...except that its been 6 months and he IMed me. He sent an emoticon smiley " and I waited 10 minutes before responding, to which I said, "Heyy." He asks, "how are ya" I said, "pretty good." & we talked about music, something we always used to talk about. It was odd, and I'm not sure what I think/feel about it other than knowing...he still has a gf. Link to comment
andy5128 Posted August 28, 2007 Share Posted August 28, 2007 Hi Stars Well if your comfortable with the contact then carry on and go into LC.. It's really about what is best for you. I would just let him initiate the contact and then return it if you wish too.. Andy Link to comment
savatar Posted August 29, 2007 Share Posted August 29, 2007 I was doing so well until now. I had went NC and LC with her and I was honesty not caring about what happened. I wanted to remain her friend (only because I've been with her so long that I still am excited to tell her stuff thats happening, just like all of my friends). However, she called me and we spoke about the papers yesterday. I went and signed them yesterday and I came to find out she went and signed them as soon as the lawyers office was open today. I know that I'm blowing that way out of proportion, but I guess the new guy she is seeing is making her rush things along. she has been txting me every day or two asking me about the papers, so I'm sure hes getting anxious. Anyway, I was fine today, then I had to call the lawyers office about soemthing and found out she signed the papers already this morning. I feel like crap now. Its really weird, its like I'm bipolar. Ill feel great one day, and then just want to cry all day the next. I cant really NC, because I have to get some more paperwork signed (car stuff & house stuff) and I have to be here when she comes and gets her stuff or drop it off there when shes there. I guess once everythings done ILl go NC. I really am tired of caring, she even sent me a letter apoligizing for what she did, but she still wants to get a divorce. I guess that is just to help her ease her guilt. I guess DAY 1 of NC Today. Again. This sucks. Link to comment
milesaway Posted August 29, 2007 Share Posted August 29, 2007 Day 6 of NC. Difficult day today, I still cant believe we are no longer together. It was a LDR but we did see each other quite a bit. Miss those late night phone conversations. I love her so much that I do want her to be happy. i will try and keep chugging along. Link to comment
Delia22 Posted August 30, 2007 Share Posted August 30, 2007 Day 9 of NC... cried my eyes out this morning because i've convinced myself that he's completely moved on, which is probably untrue. a mutual friend later told me that he's struggling with not calling me too... made me feel better for some reason. still miss though... and i miss those 'i miss you' phone calls at 2 am... a part of me still has a little hope that the phone will wake me up in the middle of the night. i wish i'd stop hoping for that. Link to comment
TijuanaJones Posted September 3, 2007 Share Posted September 3, 2007 Wow! It's been months since I posted here! I really made progress with the NC challenge. I used NC on and off, then I finally decided to talk to my ex and clear up some things. She established that she wanted us to be friends. I said ok, but after that I never felt the need to talk to her again (I had my closure). 3 months of NC later, and she called me on my cell, wondering how I was doing, and she invites me to go out for drinks. I accept, we go out, drink, dance, sing at a karaoke bar, we kissed, she tells me she regrets letting go of me, that Im a great guy, that she loves me... we end up having sex at my place, next day she calls and tells me what we did was wrong, since we are not a couple anymore. At this point, Im left wondering if she said that in order to make me ask her to go back together or something else... She said she would call again after things cool down. Well, if she calls, fine... if she doesn't call, fine... Link to comment
papalazarou Posted September 4, 2007 Share Posted September 4, 2007 Glad you feel like that old chap. Shes toying with you again!!!! Link to comment
VoleurDesCoeurs Posted September 5, 2007 Share Posted September 5, 2007 Alright. Starting the challenge. what happens after one month though? Day 1. No Contact been hard. at work, been reading for the GRE only problem is we both frequent the same news site but even when we were dating we never referred to each other so whatever, im gonna ignore him. Link to comment
TijuanaJones Posted September 5, 2007 Share Posted September 5, 2007 Alright. Starting the challenge. what happens after one month though? Day 1. No Contact been hard. at work, been reading for the GRE only problem is we both frequent the same news site but even when we were dating we never referred to each other so whatever, im gonna ignore him. Welcome! After one month nothing happens, you will just prove to yourself that you are capable of living without your ex and you will find strenght within you. After a month, you'll see that it'll be easy to start the challenge again. Take it one day at a time... good luck and keep us posted! Link to comment
micro Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 Day 14. I started to miss her very much. Immediately after breakup I was in shock and needy, and now I am calm, but I miss her even more. Link to comment
Benjyh Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 must be on about day 40 or something, i havent really thought about how many days its been for a while now, they all kinda blur into 1 at the moment. i do still think about her and miss her in certain ways but its nowhere near how it used to be, i shall just continue on in nc land in hopes of healing completely but i think thats a way off yet. Link to comment
surfjon Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 Day something, I don't know anymore, must be like 4 or 5 weeks, I've lost count because I don't really care anymore. I did see her last Monday when she dropped my daughter, I had to hand her some mail and her spare car key. I was afraid of seeing her and usually stay inside my house when she drops the kids by, but I was washing my truck and felt pretty cool so I didn't go hide inside for once, I just thought she'd stay in the car as usual but she actually got out, she looked ssooo incredibly hot too.....and I gave her her mail and she started crying, I had nothing to say, no desire to comfort her anymore, I cried myself dry for weeks and weeks and she didn't give a $hit so I don't anymore. I just walked in my house with my daughter. If she thinks I'm going to beg and plead again she's wrong. Link to comment
VoleurDesCoeurs Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 Thanks TJ, I got this email this morning, obviously not gonna respond _________________________________________________________ For? Ah T, --why are you being cryptic now? I feel like you're always suspicious of my motives and you think I'm being insincere. I don't want to push anything on you and I want you to handle this in whatever way works best for you. All I'm asking for is a simple cordial conversation every once in a while. Can you do that for me? If you do, I will try very hard not to make fun of your Madonna collection or the rumor on your new bf If you don't, you should know that I'll miss you. O. _________________________________________________ Hm Link to comment
papalazarou Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 If she thinks I'm going to beg and plead again she's wrong. Splendid! Absolutely Splendid!!!! Link to comment
TijuanaJones Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 Thanks TJ, I got this email this morning, obviously not gonna respond _________________________________________________________ For? Ah T, --why are you being cryptic now? I feel like you're always suspicious of my motives and you think I'm being insincere. I don't want to push anything on you and I want you to handle this in whatever way works best for you. All I'm asking for is a simple cordial conversation every once in a while. Can you do that for me? If you do, I will try very hard not to make fun of your Madonna collection or the rumor on your new bf If you don't, you should know that I'll miss you. O. _________________________________________________ Hm Perfect! Don't respond at all, and I would recommend deleting every single mail that he sends you from now on (without reading it, of course). If your ex is with someone, he does'nt have anything to say to you that could interest you, right? Having info about him coming your way will only plant a seed of doubt in your mind and heart and make the road to recovery more difficult for you. Stay strong, you can do it! Link to comment
VoleurDesCoeurs Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 hey TJ, Thanks but what do you mean by this If your ex is with someone, he does'nt have anything to say to you that could interest you, right? Anyway I must admit I hate that he's "so understanding" in this aspect cos i took the mail to mean that he wants me to get over him..so i guess a chance of reconcilation should vanish from my heart Link to comment
TijuanaJones Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 hey TJ, Thanks but what do you mean by this Anyway I must admit I hate that he's "so understanding" in this aspect cos i took the mail to mean that he wants me to get over him..so i guess a chance of reconcilation should vanish from my heart Oh, I meant that anything that he could say to you shouldn't be of interest to you, since he is with someone else and you don't have a chance of ending up back together. I gave my ex a chance to talk to me after 5 months of her breaking up with her rebound relationship (the guy she dated after me). I think a good rule of thumb when dealing with exes is: Always expect the worse, that way you don't get hurt. Link to comment
VoleurDesCoeurs Posted September 6, 2007 Share Posted September 6, 2007 lol TJ..I think you got it wrong, he heard rumors that IM with someone hence his teasing. Link to comment
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