Volkslad Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 6, round 2 of NC. Saw each other at work today..I'm starting to wonder if she is more affected by seeing me, than me by seeing her. Actually I'm fine seeing her, what I miss is a romanticized version of what could have been I guess. I thought to myself that she didn't look very good today when I saw her..that's got to be a good sign! Link to comment
Stella Sleepwalks Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 I thought to myself that she didn't look very good today when I saw her..that's got to be a good sign! Be pleased she looks rough as a bear's bum! My ex is only 34 and he was going grey.... I hope he gets mistaken for John Major now! Link to comment
Hope_Springs_Eternal Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 got to share this... not been posting coz to be honest, iv been out and about getting a life! its def about 2/3 weeks since i saw him and 2 weeks since our last texts and iv been completely NC (except my drunk dialling blip which Im blocking out and pretending didnt happen... because i can!! lol) anyway, this NC thing definitely works because I had a sort of 'light bulb' moment yesterday where something just clicked in my head and for the first time I thought Im better off without him. Considering I was gutted over the break up, and its a wonder I never fused my lappy with blubbering all over it to post on here, today my mind is so recovering that Im even thinking hes a bit of a d*ck. dont know how it happened but im glad it has. so everyone going through NC, just do it. Even if you think you cant cope/will die without them/ cant stop crying etc etc..whatever..just DO IT coz it works. FOR YOU thats all folks! Link to comment
LilBear Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 67 He nudged on MSN again last night. Oh well. Guess he has nothing to say except disturbing me. Link to comment
bostoneric Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 a few more weeks will make 4 months for me. finally received all my stuff I left behind today. i'm having serious anxiety about unpacking it all. i've unpacked a few boxes and have found some things that i will be sending back to her. some things I no longer want in my life now that she isnt part of it. while its finally nice to have all my stuff, it also brings with it so many memories and is making me truly sad today. Link to comment
luxe_13 Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 9 A few things happened On Sunday he turned up to a party he knew i'd be at. Of coure I was forced to speak to him. I was really drunk, he was straight sober and seemed a little cold toward me Tuesday (back at work, long weekened), he MSNs me Did you have fun on Sunday? V naughty of him as I told him we cant chat anymore. Now we seem to sort of be in contact again on MSN (I can't help myself!!). It is very minimal but I will try to cut it off again completely. Today I feel lost and emotional. I want him to be ready to be with me! Link to comment
sngrmom75 Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 2 Had a hard few days... Posted things on my public blog I probably shouldn't have... He never even responded to my email. On the positive side, I am starting to realize that he's certianly not the man I thought he was. Link to comment
rjm0827 Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Starting day 23. Feeling the same as I have for the past week. Over it and looking forward to meeting someone new, actually really excited b/c I know it will happen sooner or later. At the same time I still feel the need to call her. Not sure what I would say or why I even want to call. Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Back to day 1 Spent a wonderful afternoon yesterday with my best friend, her husband and their little baby. Came home and started feeling all nostalgic so sent him a quick email (nothing too bad but still....I should not have sent the message). Soo...here I am back at day 1 again... Link to comment
lexion Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 day 20 it's been a long time since i post here i feel great,but still think about her sometimes Link to comment
hisgirl0507 Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Made it through day 2!To be honest im not feeling any better yet and i am thinking too much about if hes going to contact me this week,which i shouldnt be.Trying to leave my phone out of my sight today so im not tempted to be checking it every 10 minutes.I want to stop focusing on him and how to get him back and try and just go out and live my life without worrying about it but its so hard.Also as it seems to be certain times of day that i want to cave,i need to keep myself busy and my mind occupied so im not thinking about it and im more distracted. Anyway its been a week today that he last contacted me(he called me),4 days since we last spoke(i called him,he told me he would call me back but never did),and 2 days since i last tried to contact him(tried calling but he didnt answer). Link to comment
honeyspur Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Wow lexion - that's great to hear - thank you for posting!!! Link to comment
lexion Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 there's this forum that i frequently go to(regional,people from my country only) and there's a thread similar to this, about people breaking up etc after my break up,i've been googling alot of things about relationship and i can share my experience with them it's great to be able to help others like this i think this break up is the best thing that ever happened to me Link to comment
bronte Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day #9 I'm a little bit sad today, but still basically okay--I got a song stuck in my head for a while that he exposed me to while we were dating, but I'm listening to as many other catchy songs as I can think of while I'm home for lunch! I've got plans to go to one of the local parks this weekend with a guy I've been dating very casually (he knows that I'm not at all ready for a serious relationship), and I'm looking forward to that. Getting outdoors for a bit is always good for lifting my spirits! Link to comment
Stella Sleepwalks Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 35 I think.... Don't know why but broke down in tears just then! Totally broke down thinking about what I said the last time we saw each other.... Told him I hoped he found someone who made him happy - didn't mean it at all. Why did I say it? He's not gonna talk to me again. Is he? Link to comment
Coffee80 Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 i stopped couting my days but i am on day 38 and sure it does feel good...!!! i can do better Link to comment
littlej Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 14 and I feel like crap today. It almost feels like there is no one out there. Link to comment
Mustang Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Not spoken to my ex since Monday. As some of you are aware, we were in LC but it wasn't really a friendship. I wouldn't talk to any other friend the way I speak to my ex. Certainly not for four months without it going anywhere. Quite frankly, if it was anyone else, I'd be bored of the pointless chit chat text messages. We were both hiding our reasons for why we're still talking. I know I have been doing it to just show her over time the person I used to be before all the split drama occurred and also to show her that I have changed a lot since we split in the hope that maybe she'd start to realise that I'm not such a bad guy after all. Why she still communicates with me I don't know. Politeness? Guilt? Uncertainty? Either way, I don't really think LC is getting me anywhere. It just put me at a stand still and I became so frustrated. I used to think - we get on well, why aren't we together anymore? When we bumped into each other randomly a few weeks ago, it was like nothing had ever happened. We were close in person. I could sense that something was still there and I guess I hoped that LC would build up the chances of reconciliation. I told her I still cared about her and she didn't respond. So I guess she's trying to stick to her guns and move on. I am not prepared to settle for something I really don't want. I love my ex dearly and faking a "friendship" with her just isn't going to work. I need to walk away and try to redeem my dignity. I've never really given her a reason to miss me. I've always cracked in the past because I've missed her. The trouble is, what I miss doesn't exist in a chit chat text message. I miss her. So we fall back into LC and I end up getting upset that it's not going anywhere. She hasn't lost me yet and she knows that. She knows how I feel and she knows that I will most probably contact her every now and then. She gets someone for free. She doesn't have to give anything back in return. So, as hard as it is going to be to completely lose her from my life, I have to. I don't want to let go but I have to. Maybe after a while, I won't miss her. I know that at least by not communicating with her anymore I can't make things any worse and I'm pretty certain that after a while, she'll start to wonder why I've stopped with the friendly chit chat messages. I don't want her to forget about me at all and that's my biggest fear right now but I am sure after a while she will start to wonder if I am forgetting about her. She was the one that ended things but said she didn't want to lose me completely. She told me she still loved me when she broke up with me (BS?) and she was really worried that she'd regret her decision. That was the last time she was open and honest about how she felt. In the four months since then, it's been neutral. No emotions shown whatsoever. Link to comment
sngrmom75 Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Contacted him today... Damn. Damn. Damn. Should I beat myself up for that? I know for a FACT that if I wasn't pregnant I would be moooooooving oooooon... It would be so much easier for me to just let go... So hard to let go when I have someone kicking me in the stomach, literally, 20 times a day... a constant reminder. He always asks me what's going on with the baby, health insurance, money matters... Of course, all THAT stuff is all I have in my life right now... And, because I'm pregnant with OUR baby and we are still married, I feel like he deserves to know those things... But I know NOTHING about what's going on in his life... I've moved halfway accross the country and I've been gone for 2 weeks. I don't know if his "girlfriend" is moved in to our apartment or what... Don't I deserve to know? I mean, if I am filing for divorce eventually, don't I desrve to know where I stand? I want SO BADLY to do NC... Especially when the LC I swore to myself would be business and only business becomes so dificult... But HOW do I do NC when I'm pregnant? I need advice... Link to comment
LilBear Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Day 68 today Kinda feel crappy Link to comment
mankow Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Going to day #8 after midnight but I have to post now. You say if you still don't contact but meet with an ex to post here! Well she send me message to exchange some property with mutual friend as middle (wo)man. But as we work in the same building somehow I ran into her when bringing that book. I didn't answer her message even if it seems not polite (from my perspective but as I had to explain to her where I was and that I coudn't do it that day I just didn't answer I am still NCing her you know). But was unable to do it yesterday since I was out of town on business trip. I decided to give the book back and also get some of my property, too. So I did it the first day possible i.e. today. Well she thanked me for bringing her book and I gave it directly, and she then started informal conversation, which was short as there were other people around. I mainly listened and answered direct question she asked me. Does it count as NC break? I wasn't trying to go back to my office when I saw her and act stupid, ridiculous. It was very short but it had some effect on me, now I am further into NC of course. I am sure that it is the best way to heal and eventualy can talk to her or reconciliate. She was very polite, which is very different from last breaking NC by me. During the day I had one period of thinking how life goes on and I can be without her in that part of my life ahead of me. I still had strong love feelings and few minutes ago almost gone into tears remembering her favourite singer, but I was strong enough not to let myself. Hope this is good sign. Thank god I got you people so my time goes faster in these moments Link to comment
Volkslad Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 Day 7. She came into the kitchen at work and said, "I could smell your cologne in the hallway", I said, "that's a good trick, I'm not wearing any"..and left. I'd like to do full NC, but try working 50 feet from your ex! Any contact where I'm minding my own business and get talked to can't count as breaking NC..can it? Link to comment
RaeKarma Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 day 52 school makes me sleepy Link to comment
lexion Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 day 21 i still have my ups and down but knowing that my experience can help other people,made me feel better i kept thingking is it fair that she's happy with someone else,while i'm sad where is God in this? i know it's not a good thing to think about,but lately,that tought kinda stuck on my mind it's just unfair while she's in love with someone while i have to repair my heart before i can love someone else Link to comment
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