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Hope_Springs_Eternal

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  1. Hope_Springs_Eternal
  2. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    I think it must be yes, because a couple of days ago I was saying that instead of thinking about my ex less, I was thinking about him MORE, and other people said they were too. The main problem was that the memories were good ones, so I had to fix this by keeping my 'bad list' by me to remind me of the things he had done that make me feel unloved, unwanted and worthless. It works, but only if you keep it handy. If you put it in a drawer you start to think loving thoughts again, why, I havent a clue? Like everyone here, its those loving thoughts that drag you down because your back to square one again when you realise you cant have or be with the person you love most in the world
  3. Hope_Springs_Eternal
  4. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    maybe things arent as great with the new g/f as you think. If he's been keeping one eye on the calendar shes not got his full attention has she? I dont want to give you any false hopes at all, but it is quite enlightening that he has been paying such close attention IMO. I think your right not to respond yet. give yourself some breathing room and let yourself formulate a great response that tells him just enough but not too much, that will leave him wanting more. good luck, let us know how you go on x
  5. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    1) The fact that he noticed mid April had come and gone and he contacted you says a lot. To me it says he was waiting to hear from you and looking forward to it. When he didnt hear anything he was motivated to contact YOU. 2) He said "If your ready" which to me implies that if your not, its ok to tell him its too soon. To be honest I dont think this will put him off because its obvious he wants to speak with you. 3) You say its a perfectly fine message from a guy who has no romantic interest but wants to be friends, but dont jump the gun. If he was thinking friends and not bothered about you he would have just waited to hear from you and not been 'clock watching' for the middle of the month? I might be wrong, but so might you. 4) If you have no idea how to respond, then right now, DONT. Im presuming he wont know if youve opened the mail or not, so its not like he will be thinking your ignoring him. Just take some breathing space and construct a light, friendly, chatty one with nothing heavy in it. something he will enjoy so he comes back for more etc. 5) Your online chat friend. Meet him for coffee anyway. Its good to make new friends, and he may not be in real life what you expect. This is all about YOU and what will get you through. 6) Yes, I do think they can somehow sense these things, ie. when your moving on etc. Lifes strange like that! Your doing GREAT, and I can see things panning out for you. chin up, Hope x
  6. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    we sure will litgirl. Its good to know theres someone else also thinking of the ex MORE not less. Mustang has noticed it too. I was beginning to think I was on my own with it.
  7. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    Lit your right, it was either a full moon or something in the water! you have been no contact for exactly the same time as me then, this is five weeks today and for some bizarre reason that I cant fathom out, Im thinking of him MORE not less. I dont know if this is normal or what?
  8. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    fairy, it just proves your human x
  9. Hope_Springs_Eternal
  10. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    oh fairy, I know, your so right, I have been good not looking at his online profiles but I checked one out this weekend and he's hidden it. must be because he doesnt want his new girl to see it, or the girl who is staying at his. i feel like crying im having such a c**p day i am going to go out to the pictures tonight i think, just to put him out of my brain for even a minute. just a minutes peace would do but im aiming for the hour
  11. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    You know what Mustang? I'll almost guarantee it. I dont know about you, but Im finding that the further away from the break up and last contact Im getting, the MORE im thinking about the ex? so it must be happening to them to. dont contact her, stay strong. With your emotions running this high if you dont get the response you want it might set you back BIG TIME.
  12. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    I am five weeks no contact today, and I have to say its probably my WORST weekend yet. He has had someone staying over at his. Not sure if its the first girl he was with or if he's got a new one now (someone told me he might have a new girl) and it doesnt make me feel great I gotta say. right now im blanking it out of my head la la la la, coz if I really think about it I think I will crack up big time
  13. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    hi rep, well its two fold really. Firstly, by NO CONTACT whatsoever your making sure you dont say or do the wrong thing to push them away further. It also helps you break your 'habit' of them if they are someone you are used to seeing or speaking to daily. Its a way of basically training your brain to not expect that contact. Its also giving the ex the space they asked for when they finished it. And letting them truly experience what life is like without you in it. Its a chance for them to miss you and maybe realise they dont want their 'freedom' after all. That part isnt guaranteed, but its as good a shot as any which is why we're all doing it. The added benefit is that you can work on yourself while you in NC so that if you do bump into them you will look great! good luck x
  14. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    Theres two ways of looking at it, yes he might have moved on lock stock and barrel but I doubt it so soon? how do you know its not been done to make you JEALOUS?
  15. Hope_Springs_Eternal
    so true bronte, the rough days get less and less, and thats what's keeping me going at the moment, just knowing that. Also, a dawning realisation that I WILL move on, even though right now the thought of another man does nothing for me. I just sort of KNOW that there IS someone out there for me if my ex never comes back. Its a new sense of hope that I am convinced has come out of total NC, and the support of reading the experiences of other posters on the forum. Even in the depths of despair when iv been crying for an hour, I can come on here and find a story that lifts my spirits and changes my day. for that I thank you and everyone on ENA, Hope x
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