What Point To Life Have You Found?

[Eto]

A major issue that those suffering from depression deal with is finding a point to life. Thus, suicide can enter your mind. I'm posting this more for those of you that DO see a point in life as I, even though I'm feeling relatively well at the moment, fail to see the point.

Recently I sold a story of mine to a publisher for a decent amount of money, which at that time made me happy. I felt a sense of accomplishment I suppose. The money meant little to me however. Paying off some debt was nice however; there isn't anything tangible that I really want.

Do you know why the majority of the time I don't see a point in life? One: I, as a human am insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Two: I find society to be quite disagreeable, particularly American society. I realize I may be over analyzing everything but I can't make myself ignore the soulless, materialistic, ignorant, narrow-minded, hypocritical, violent, malevolent, conforming, complacent, intolerant .... ways of American culture. How can we find true happiness with ourselves when there is so much we don't do to help those in need? How on earth can there actually be people starving in this nation when our government is busy destroying and then rebuilding have a dozen other nations at the same time? Why is there always enough money to invent creative ways to kill one another and go to war but not enough to pay teachers or have a universal healthcare system?

Now I label all this as American but I know we aren't the only nation like this. I know these aren't strictly American traits but more human traits. It seems to me as if humans in general, regardless of nationality, race, or religion have an affinity for hating each other. Humans just love dividing themselves into groups, and then sub-groups, and then sub-sub-groups just to say, "Hey! You're not like us! We hate you! Better yet, since you disagree with us or you have something we want, screw discussing it, we'll just kill you!"

OK, back to why I was writing this in the first place, tell me what YOUR point is. Tell me how you can ignore the misery in this world. Please, tell me how comfortable you are with all this and how you can live your life to the fullest. I'd really like to know.

[DN]

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[SaraJane]

For me... my point is to protect and provide my children with all they need to be healthy, hardworking, respectful, appreciative, and loving people.

 

And though I feel like Im a failure 99% of the time, I havent had enough of a reason to give up yet. Every day is a challenge, and every little bit of laughter we share is enough to give me some hope that I havent screwed up too much yet.

[KillTheSilence]

u make a fine point in labeling society. I agree, but it really isn't going to help you if you keep the scoreboard tidier than you keep yourself. Being involved in things give a better perspective on life, too; keeping the scoreboard with you or not.

 

I realize your avatar says satan inside.

why not try getting involved with a good church and see what different perspectives of life you see there?

I went to church camp this summer and there was this gothic dude who really changed himself when he became involved in the small groups.

[AOX]

A quote from an anonymous person has drastically changed my point of view:

"I have come to realize that we live in order to change someone else's life."

 

With this, I have halted my search for meaning. I believe I am here for that very reason, to change someone else's life. Could my whole life's purpose be that I drove a drunken friend home and thus saved their life? Or maybe that smile I passed along to the clerk at the department store gave a spark of hope and as a result they didn't follow through with a possible suicide attempt? All very far-fetched, I know. But, I am illustrating a point that I find my meaning is in every single detail of this life, frivolous or not.

[Yvette84]

Point to life my life SUCKED before.....now it has been transformed!

 

[bebecole]

A quote from an anonymous person has drastically changed my point of view:

"I have come to realize that we live in order to change someone else's life."

 

With this, I have halted my search for meaning. I believe I am here for that very reason, to change someone else's life. Could my whole life's purpose be that I drove a drunken friend home and thus saved their life? Or maybe that smile I passed along to the clerk at the department store gave a spark of hope and as a result they didn't follow through with a possible suicide attempt? All very far-fetched, I know. But, I am illustrating a point that I find my meaning is in every single detail of this life, frivolous or not.

 

i like it

[bebecole]

my reason for life-

well i really never knew what my life was about up until recently.

My bestfriend just died in a horrible car accident. i would always talk to her about everything; life, relationships, family. EVERYTHING.

Now thats she passed alot of the stuff i want to do is for her.

I want to make her proud and stand my own ground for her.

Alot of the advice she gave me im using till this day.

 

so my point of life is to be happy and healthy. thats its, plain and simple.

so thats all i really want out of life. i dont take anything for granted, i love my family and friends in my life and i wouldnt change it for the world.

[nottoogreen]

I never was over-analyzing. In my early teens the storyline was "Nixon and the rich kill our kids and walk over dead bodies" sprayed and painted accross walls. There was the as yet unnamed "evil empire" and concerns of WW III, sure but when?. There also was alcoholic dad (suicide in '74) battling it out with abusive mom.

 

I always wanted to live and get out of there. Have a happy family, do work which I enjoy, simple. Well, on try three it works.

 

A few years ago, once I was pretty depressed and angry with myself but still never wanted to die. I just convicted myself to death on 22 counts of gross stupidity. I prepared and tested suicide out. It would have worked but that test was enough. Left that behind and focus on the future.

 

Other then family and work, what AOX said is more than enough to live.

 

Eto, you think too much and you are too soft. I at times thought too little and was too tough. Balance is it. Such is life.

[Eto]

Eto, you think too much and you are too soft.

The reason I can't ignore everything and "think too much" because I'm scared that if I didn't, who would? And if nobody questioned and worried and kept the wickedness in the forefront of their mind, evil will win.

 

I realize your avatar says satan inside.

why not try getting involved with a good church and see what different perspectives of life you see there?

I went to church camp this summer and there was this gothic dude who really changed himself when he became involved in the small groups.

 

The avatar I use doesn't mean that I am "gothic" or worship satan. I find the idea of God and Satan to be equally ludicrous concepts. I wasn't aloud to use the Nazi flag as my avatar so this is the next best offensive image I could muster.

I appreciate your suggestion but quite honestly I find organized religion to be one of most offensive aspects of society. I agree that the symbolism contained within the bible is great and the world would be a better place if more people would embrace such ideas but to literally believe...? Myths and fairy tales. Look at the Middle East to see what a great job religion does at uniting everyone.

[KillTheSilence]

religion is the belief that we're here for a reason. we're not the middle east and organized religion is a group of people who agree with each other why we exist. religion has never been a way to unite with the world, usually just with the people of the same religion and whoever that religion converted.

[denisemarie]

tell me what YOUR point is. Tell me how you can ignore the misery in this world. Please, tell me how comfortable you are with all this and how you can live your life to the fullest. I'd really like to know.

People are my point. My kids, my patients, the students I can help at school, even the grumpy checker at the grocery store who I joke with and make smile. I live to do something for someone each and everyday. People are what give me life and what makes me smile and feel good. It doesn't have to be BIG ...just a simple smile of acknowledgement from anyone and that's what makes my heart skip a beat. I just love to see a difference in someone. When I shock my kids with french toast tomorrow morning or let that car in front me into traffic on my commute to school I will feel BIG and thats what matters to me.

 

 

I think someone once coined the term "think globally, act locally" if we cannot make those around us smile how can we make a difference in this world.

[denisemarie]

"I have come to realize that we live in order to change someone else's life."

My sentiments exactly! A little difference from alot of people make BIG changes.

[Anna.]

Ok, good question. As a philosophy major I wrestle with this question in my personal and in my academic life. I used to get so very upset, you know? And no, I haven't found a concrete answer to it yet. But I've made my peace with it.

 

I know that I am only responsible for myself as I have no control over anybody else. So I do my part, you know? I vote, I try not to be wasteful, I do what I can, because I am more of a benefit to the universe when I actively do my part, regardless of how insignificant it may seem.

 

Life is beautiful, you know? Have you read Aristotle? Life is art. I try to accept it for what it is. I see the beauty of the tragedy of it all. There is so much passion in the world. And it's all overwhelming, sometimes, too. I took a year off of school to take care of my sister's newborn son and it taught me alot. Being around children is a beautiful experience. They don't know anything and they are beautiful and innocent and full of hope. Maybe this one will be the one that makes life better for everybody, you never know, you know? I don't know, you might think I'm naive. But I've felt pain, REAL pain and I've felt true love and both are passionate experiences. It's the pain that allowed me to realize the beauty of love and the happiness in my life.

[vandgsmom]

I cannot ignore the misery in this world. I can not and will not ever be comfortable with the death and misery that escalates with each breath I take.

 

I CAN however, set my sights on the misery that I can actually do something about. I make a difference in each of my patients lives. I take my kids and volunteer at the local nursing homes to sit with those who have no family. I pass out food at the shelter and sew clothes for foster kids. Above all, I spend every free second teaching my children to be better stewards of the world given to them.

 

If you were my child I would hold you close to me until you could tell me just how it was that you only see the evil and the hate in a world that could make something as perfectly fragile as a child. What has hurt you that you can't look through it to see the world as you did when you were too little to know what war and poverty meant? There are things worth living for and if for no other reason than life itself.

 

Maybe your point is to stir the pot so others will become more globally proactive.

 

My point is to give as much love as I can, to take as little from the world as I can to get by, and to leave a legacy on Earth in the form of my children that will someday make the difference that I dreamed of when I was a child.

[nottoogreen]

The reason I can't ignore everything and "think too much" because I'm scared that if I didn't, who would? And if nobody questioned and worried and kept the wickedness in the forefront of their mind, evil will win.

Thanks to what squarewheel wrote in the other thread I PM'ed you, I do understand your feelings.

 

I thought about it and your basic issue seems quite simple, and the solution will take time. You mode is think too global > problem too big to solve > give up.

 

I was going to write more but vandgsmom saved me the work with her excellent post above.

 

Eto, please try to think small for a while. Be a little selfish. You have a life, you deserve to live it.

[Miss M]

I wasn't aloud to use the Nazi flag as my avatar so this is the next best offensive image I could muster.

How can we find true happiness with ourselves when there is so much we don't do to help those in need?

I would suggest that it could start with something quite small. For instance, not trying to use an avatar to try to be offensive, and not intentionally using symbols that promote evil, hatred, and disharmony on a message board where people have come together to try to "help those in need." After all, you could join in the HELPFULNESS you find right here in this community, instead of thinking of ways to muster the most offensive image.

 

It seems to me as if humans in general, regardless of nationality, race, or religion have an affinity for hating each other.

Yeah, it's really weird how that keeps happening.

 

The reason I can't ignore everything and "think too much" because I'm scared that if I didn't, who would? And if nobody questioned and worried and kept the wickedness in the forefront of their mind, evil will win.

Irony?

 

"Be the peace you want to see in the world."

[Eto]

If you were my child I would hold you close to me until you could tell me just how it was that you only see the evil and the hate in a world that could make something as perfectly fragile as a child. What has hurt you that you can't look through it to see the world as you did when you were too little to know what war and poverty meant?

 

 

God, I want to be held so bad. I want to cry and cry on someone's shoulder and ask them to be there for me, that I'm so very tired of being by myself. Deep down I know there's one point to my life though I haven't much confidence in actually reaching it. I want a family. That's something that i've never had. Yes, I have parents but I don't love them. Dad was gone on business the majority of the time. He's highly intelligent and lacks social skills. My mother is the definition of manic. Abusive and alcoholic as well. I have five older siblings that I don't know. (age difference, geographically divided) All my grandparents died before I was born.

I think deep down I'm bitter about not having any close family. Dad makes good money so I never went without anything. In retrospect I realize my parents were trying to buy my love. I felt guilty growing up knowing that I had more than others. As a result my birthday and Chistmas are abosolute hell for me because recieving gifts from people makes me very uncomfartable. People praising me makes me uneasy too.

About a year and half ago I got engaged to a girl whom I loved very much. Long story short, three months later she went crazy on me and I haven't spoken to her since. That was the last straw really. I quit speaking to all my friends, moved, changed jobs, and have been alone since.

Living in solitude has given me time to think not only about myself but about the world in general. I'm just bitter. And jealous of people that actually have some sort of "normal" family structure.

[BrokenWingedFaery]

Try this: go for a walk in fairly populated area and smile at everyone you see, maybe talk to a couple people.

 

At least one of them is saying to themselves "Hey...that person smiled at me, said hello. Not all people are bad...".

 

So there's your purpose. To prove to someone, everyday, that not all people suck.

[vandgsmom]

 

 

God, I want to be held so bad. I want to cry and cry on someone's shoulder and ask them to be there for me, that I'm so very tired of being by myself.

 

I know exactly what you mean. That is why I come here.

 

Life is not easy for anyone, no matter how it seems from the outside looking in. What makes the difference is deciding to choose whether to work towards happiness or to lay in your personal puddle of sorrow until you drown.

 

I was raised so much like you it is scary. Dad gone most of the time, Mom was manic after surviving cancer, and I just kind of got on by myself. I learned to be self-sufficient, I could cook and clean and budget; what I didn't learn was how to love other people and how to let myself be loved. Actually, I still don't know how, but I am trying.

 

Your first step (and mine was too) is to try to cleanse yourself of all of the negativity and to surround yourself with things that give you hope. The hate becomes such a part of you that even if someone were to get close enough to hold you, they wouldn't be able to get past the angry shell to the sweet guy underneath.

 

Get rid of the things that make you more concerned about the fate of the world than the fate of yourself. The books, the posters, the clothes with hateful slogans, and if need be, the friends. For each thing you take away from your life, add something positive. A tiny plant to water and watch grow. A picture of your mother that reminds you of one nice day you had or a book on how to let go. Let your anger go.

 

Your second step is to walk out into the real world where people are too concerned with the everyday to fixate on the evilness of things that they cannot change by themselves and to join them. Work a little more, maybe volunteer, spend time at the bookstore, or just go for walks by yourself. Find someone to kiss and cuddle that will hold onto you and maybe let you whisper the things that hurt your heart into their ear.

 

These are all small things you can do to heal. Once you heal yourself, then you can work on the rest of the world. One step at a time, you know?

[Spugly Fuglet]

OK, back to why I was writing this in the first place, tell me what YOUR point is. Tell me how you can ignore the misery in this world. Please, tell me how comfortable you are with all this and how you can live your life to the fullest. I'd really like to know.

 

 

I have no point to my life, I do not rememebr asking for it but find that I have it life that is. If I fall into a coma I find that my body all by its self carrys on what needs to bedone for life and others will feed and water me.

 

I find that for my life is lived no more no less, I find that I like life and that thow I have been told that there are many things out side of my life I only know that part of the world I have come into contact with.

 

I find that how I live is for more inportent than if I live.

 

To know that I walk a path and see where it leads me.

[itsallgrand]

Vandgmom's posts nearly made me cry.

Ain't it sickening how love and genuine caring can pierce through it all? #-o

Not sickening. Beautiful. But it sure can let the floodgates down for the pain to come out.

 

Eto,

 

i've racked my skull searching for a point in life.

i get ripe and bitter at regular intervals of time. there is a lot of misery, bs, aching, pain, unfathomable horrors in this world.

there is also a lot of love. on good days, i can honestly say that is all that i need.

there is no point that i have, except to try to remain human.

 

I thank you for this post. And all the answers and sharing people have provided too.

[Daddy Bear]

we all won the ultimate lottery just by being born. all of living humanity could fit into a cube a mile long on each side (yeah, we'd suffocate, but that's beside the point). most of the rest of the uncountable trillions of molecules on this rare blue planet have the misfortunate of forever remaining water and dirt.

 

the big catch to being a person is that we're all on a clock. how best to spend the precious little time we're each given? do we throw up our hands in despair at the misery that exists and lie down to die, or do we dig in with all we've got and try to do something about it?

[Outcasted]

OK, back to why I was writing this in the first place, tell me what YOUR point is. Tell me how you can ignore the misery in this world. Please, tell me how comfortable you are with all this and how you can live your life to the fullest. I'd really like to know.

 

I think some of you definitely need to try living in another country, particularly Europe. I've personally found a better life living in Europe. Now that I"m back in AMerica, because I ran out of money, I can't wait to move back. Living in a foreign country was useful for me because it made it easier to actually meet new people than in America. I live in New York and haven't made any new friends for over 10 years. While in Europe I constantly meet new people and am always making friends, gives me meaning in my life.

 

Europe also offers me adventure, not just sitting home in America. THere is something about being able to travel a couple hours and be in a completely differnt culture. You can't really adventure in America, its mostly all the same..

 

I think I'm somebody who constantly needs adventure, constantly needs to be meeting new people, I also need the feeling that I'm special (don't we all), and being an AMerican in Europe offers all of this for me. Now that I left this and am back living my dull life here in America I feel like suicide.. Luckily I have hope that I will return once I make some money.

[BlueFire]

Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living. How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.

 

How is one to live a moral and compassionate existence when one is fully aware of the blood, the horror inherent in life, when one finds darkness not only in one's culture but within oneself? If there is a stage at which an individual life becomes truly adult, it must be when one grasps the irony in its unfolding and accepts responsibility for a life lived in the midst of such paradox. One must live in the middle of contradiction, because if all contradiction were eliminated at once life would collapse. There are simply no answers to some of the great pressing questions. You continue to live them out, making your life a worthy expression of leaning into the light.

 

Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that the stuff life is made of. Live it happely. make it so!