sbrew21 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Share Posted January 16, 2006 Mattie, when I said that, I truly knew that what he was doing was not what I wanted. It was extremely difficult to say because I did fear losing him but I would have been ok. Of course he has been great and stuck around since then and I fell for him. Now I am scared I am going to lose him. Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Share Posted January 16, 2006 Sorry for the misunderstanding. I didn't get that from your post. yea i had posted a few months back so annie was asking me how all of that went so I told her what had happened. I do appreicate all the advice. I just really want to stay confident. Link to comment
Dako Posted January 16, 2006 Share Posted January 16, 2006 Sorry I put my size 14 in my mouth. Link to comment
annie24 Posted January 16, 2006 Share Posted January 16, 2006 I'll tell you a little story. I went out with my guy this weekend. I got all dolled up and put on gorgeous heels and a great minidress, even though it was in the 30s this weekend! I don't care - I just wanted to look good. When he picked me up, he just took one look at me and laughed. He's like, "It's freezing! What are you doing?" I just told him, "There's no snow, damnit, I'm wearing heels!" We had a nice time and on the way home, I said, "you never told me I look nice." He said, "Oh, I thought I did." I said, "No - all you did was laugh." We laughed about it, but he never told me I looked nice by the end of the convo. I know I looked good, and I know he thought so too! But, he never said it - so.... I guess what I'm trying to say is that maybe he does love you, but either isn't ready to say it, or thought he said it, but didn't! Boys are strange sometimes..... Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Share Posted January 16, 2006 well iknow for a fact that he knows he didn't say it. boys are dumb. no offense to all of you. Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Share Posted January 16, 2006 somethin like that Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Share Posted January 16, 2006 i have no regrets. it just does suck that i put all my cards on the table and now the ball is in his court. I just need to be strong. Link to comment
annie24 Posted January 16, 2006 Share Posted January 16, 2006 well, I agree with your girlfriends. If everything else is fine in the relationship, just try to let it go (I know! hard!) and just go back to normal. Just see how things go. Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 16, 2006 Author Share Posted January 16, 2006 yea, just have to see what happens Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 he called me last night. I wasn't able to answer since I was at the gym. He has never once left me a message (he says he just hates leaving messages) and left one for me. Hopefully that's a good sign. I ended up texting him good night. I am so nervous to talk to him now. I know I shouldn't be but I just feel like things are going to be awkward. Link to comment
ocrob Posted January 17, 2006 Share Posted January 17, 2006 I have always had a problem saying I love you at the beginning. I will not say it unless I am 100% sure. I think you are looking at this in the wrong way. I respect him for not saying it back. It does not mean he does not love you, but he may just not know yet or may just be uncomfortable. You have not been going out that long. There are a lot of guys out there that would have said it back just to get what they want. This guy sound a little uncomfortable and maybe inexperienced at expressing himself. Just give the guy some time. Link to comment
sbrew21 Posted January 17, 2006 Author Share Posted January 17, 2006 i agree 100%. I for sure don't want him to say it if he doesn't mean it. It still sucks though. You hope they feel the same way. I just was honest with my feelings. I got nervous because I thought I might have freaked him out. I do respect him for not saying it though. He did invite me out for dinner and movies tonight so at least he isn't avoiding me. Link to comment
hockeylvr Posted October 9, 2008 Share Posted October 9, 2008 Hey! I noticed you haven't been on this for a while, but I figured I would try anyway. My boyfriend of 6 months just did the exact same thing to me, hugs and kisses included, but no reply. Actually my situation differed from yours slightly because after the hugs and kisses he said "it's so soon". I was hoping you would be able to tell me how your situation ended up working out. It's been a long few days since I said it. I think they've only been long for me because of the crying and feeling like a wreck etc. (never in front of him of course!), but not for him because he's trying to keep things normal. He's always joking around trying to make me laugh. I'm so confused because he completely acts like he loves me, but then he couldn't say it back. This hurts. Link to comment
calidreamin0 Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 break up ASAP. this situation will not get better. I was in two relationships that this happened in. I gave the first one a month or so to say it back, and he never did and HE ended up breaking up with me. What you did was put your relationship in check, you know he doesn't love you, and he probably won't be saying it anytime soon. I would get out and move on. I know its human nature to wait around to see what happeneds. but do you want to be with someone who doesn't love you back? its a horrible way to feel. Link to comment
ThisGirl Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 It really boils down to what you want and what you are willing to sacrifice. For me, I am a very affectionate and expressive person and I see no reason for a man to behave differently towards me if we are mutually in love. Some ladies give the boys a pass with things like that, and that is their decision. If this is the only thing that is bothering you, then you have to decide if it is more important than everything else he is giving you. Give it a week or two (yes it will be long weeks! hang in there!), and if he still doesn't reciprocate, it's time to make that decision. You can ask about it gently as the days go by, but you can't force him or coerce him, of course. There's no wrong answer hun, different people need different things, and if you are okay with it, no one can judge you, but if you are not and it really bothers you, you don't have to hang around just because he isn't doing anything else "wrong." Affection and saying I love you isn't just a "girl thing." Link to comment
ProtestTheHero Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 Maybe he feels like it's too soon? I don't get it. First, women complain because the guy who drops the "I love you" line all the time is breaking up with them and they feel like everything was a lie (refer to the breakup section of this forum). Now, when a guy is trying to be sincere and doesn't want to just jump the gun at a few months, you should breakup with him ASAP? Lol. Quit trying, guys. Link to comment
calidreamin0 Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 you should know if you love someone after 6 months. ...! if he can't even notion to her that he could love her, than its a waste of her time and he is stringing along. again, i speak from experience.. so this is my view. Link to comment
hopeless66 Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 I don't agree that you should know if you love someone after the first 6 months...Usually the first year, sometimes more, is the honeymoon stage. That exciting new feeling of something new... Most of the time the feeling of love is more the feeling of lust.. So what if you love someone right away and they don't feel the same at the exact moment. Thats what relationships are. Growing together. Maybe not at the same pace, but still growing... If he is adamant about commitment than absolutely cut your losses and bail. If the guy wants to be with you and is committed than why rush the issue... Too many people look to others to make them happy or complete them. Make yourself happy. If you are enjoying your time together, why run? Link to comment
noneeka Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 This guy doesn't really sound to appealing. Why did you fall for him in the first place? If he doesn't open up now and you have to do most of the work in communication than picture yourselves down the line when he feels really comfortable and doesn't even give what he's giving now! Link to comment
annie24 Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 this thread is 2 years old. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted October 10, 2008 Share Posted October 10, 2008 this thread is 2 years old. DOH! i hate it when that happens lol Link to comment
calidreamin0 Posted October 11, 2008 Share Posted October 11, 2008 haha, so i wonder what happened with the original poster? did he say i love you or not! Link to comment
Same_Boat Posted March 29, 2010 Share Posted March 29, 2010 haha, so i wonder what happened with the original poster? did he say i love you or not! How funny, I am bumping this thread 4 years later because I want to know what happened too!! lol I wonder if he ever said it? Or did they break up? Hhmmm.......would be interesting to know, I'm in a similar situation right now. Link to comment
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