Graduating without my family

[Sarina Sarina]

I'm a highschool senior and my graduation is tomorrow. I don't have a lot of friends because I'm very introverted. I used to think my family of 6 (including me) could make up for that, but not anymore. Not today. And certainly not tomorrow. You see, my father passed away this year, and while that is horrible in itself, I had come to terms with his absence from my graduation a long time ago. My brother (I have 3 older siblings) cannot attend either due to military training, but I had also come to terms with his absence as well. For the past couple years, I had expected to throw my cap and receive my diploma in the presence of my mother and two sisters at least. But today, the day before my graduation, one of my sisters informed me (through text) that she would not be attending. You see, my sister is getting married in the fall and she had apparently  scheduled an appointment for "wedding stuff" tomorrow. She's been planning her wedding since January. My graduation date has been set since August. And yet, the two have managed to coincide.

I feel like I should just be grateful for the two attending. I also feel like a bombshell has been dropped on me. My heart also feels as if it's dropped to the center of the earth. I'm having a lot emotions and I don't know how to handle them besides crying until I can't breathe. I'm worried that I'm gonna have a breakdown tomorrow. Any advice for someone like me? Any is appreciated...

[boltnrun]

I'm sorry this happened.

I've come to realize there are some people who are only focused on themselves and there's nothing I can do about it.

Please try to enjoy your big day with your mom and other sister. They're going to be so proud of you.

And congratulations! 🎉

[catfeeder]

My sympathy for the loss of your father. To make this your best day possible, I would stay focused like a laser beam on the joy that I'm bringing to my mother on this day. She birthed you and raised you, so this is a milestone for her, too.

Congrats on your graduation!

[Capricorn3]

4 hours ago, boltnrun said:

Please try to enjoy your big day with your mom and other sister. They're going to be so proud of you.

I agree with the above.  Focus on enjoying your special day with them and let all the rest fall by the wayside.

Congratulations 🙂

[Batya33]

Agree with the others and Congratulations! True friends don't do this when it comes to "wedding stuff" that can be rescheduled especially since it's a  fixed day. But put aside the negativity and maybe don't be available for her wedding stuff.

[Starlight925]

First of all, congratulations!  Yay you!!

Secondly, I am so so sorry for the loss of your father.

As for the siblings who won't move around their busy schedules, well poo on them.  

Some people, you'll learn in life, as has been said above, can't, or won't, see outside themselves.  If it doesn't directly affect them, they have no interest.

Enjoy your day, throw your cap, and be proud of what you've done!

[Sarina Sarina]

Hello everyone! First off, I want to thank y'all very very much. I was so overwhelmed with the sudden reality that my sister would not be at my graduation, and y'all have given me insight that helped me cope during those panicking hours.

In the end, my sister reached out to me and my mother the morning of the graduation. She called our mother while I was getting ready and apparently she was crying on the phone, saying that she didn't know what to do. My mother encouraged her to try and move the appointment, which is what my sister should have done in the first place, but in the end, she was able to move the appointment more easily than she had thought. Today, I got to receive my high school diploma (and lose my cap when I threw it in the air) in the presence of my mother, my sister, my other sister, and my brother-in-law in the audience.

When we walked the stage to shake the principal's hand and receive the diploma, family members of the graduate were expected to stand. There were a lot of moments when over a dozen people would stand for one graduate. There were a few moments when only two stood. It got me thinking. I love my family so very much, and while we have flaws (like our great miscommunication skills), we have to stick together. Today it was graduation, tomorrow it may be something worse. If my sister hadn't tried reaching out, I would have cried during the entire ceremony. I might not have brought my grandparents and great uncles and aunts and cousins to my graduation ceremony, but I brought some of the people that mean the entire world to me. And I'm so glad they were there for me!

Thank you again,

- Sarina G.

[Batya33]

Many congratulations and I'm so glad it worked out! I hope you have some time to yourself and time to celebrate!