Time management

[Kwothe28]

I was planning to post this thread a while ago, which is funny in retrospect since Ive been dealing with procastrination. Ive been generally OK. My mom sadly passed away but been handling it OK. And in the middle of that mess, I managed to land full time job with my college diploma. I did part- time teaching in one school but place opened up in another school since their "educational specialist"(dunno how else to translate in English, most closest to that as a job is a guidance couselor at school) went on pregnancy leave. So Ive been doing that full time for a few months now. Coincidentally at my own elemantary school, my own teacher is still there lol. Did 2 months for them to see if I am a good fit and they decided to leave me there(they seem to be happy with my work) until the other person gets back to work(roughly until the end of the year). Pay is pretty good for my country and in addition to that I have been doing freelance work for years so in a way I have 2 jobs though I did put less hours into freelance one because Ive been doing something else full time.

Anyway, Ive been doing OK. But my procastrination issues are showing up more since I do have less time for other things. For example, I never late for work or miss a deadline. Always wake up on time(always have alarm on) and been handling more urgent things like preparing food or feeding the dog at good time. In freelance your timeline is flexible so as long as you keep up a deadline its OK. But for example, I tend to prepare myself(wash teeth, shave, shower etc) at "the last time" right before work. Always manage to look presentable and show on time but its infuriating that I do it within an hour before work. Same with other stuff. For example I turn on washing machine fairly regularly because I change stuff frequently. But if I want to do it one day, I sometimes leave it for tomorrow. Colleague and I change shifts since kids here go to school in 2 shifts and we cover both. So its not so much of an issue when I cover earlier shift since I do have a time for stuff like that later in the day. But when I do afternoon one, I get home late. So, yesterday I planned to turn on washing machine and order some stuff online(I wanted one of those vertical steam irons because Ive heard they are good and hate ironing with an old iron and board). But managed to put washing machine on and sadly slept away till this morning where I had to do a morning shift. So, I turned off machine in the morning(its not that big of a deal since it stops working automatically when it finishes, just not turned off from power and all), prepared and gone to work, so I put stuff from the machine on wire to dry only when I have came home. And ordered the vertical iron after that. See how infuriating that is? 

So, I guess my question is, how do others manage it? Again, its not that huge of an issue. Usually when I set up to do something, I do it, if not today, then tomorrow. But its still something that I like to work on since it bothers me. Do I setup a list and try to check stuff of from it? Do I try to do something else? Any other ideas to get over this issue?

[Batya33]

As a mom and working part time and doing most of the house cleaning/laundry/food prep/errands I hear you.  I like the checklist idea.  I live by my cleaning routines and school prep routines and I have reminders on my phone.  Many.  How about old fashion bribing yourself?

Congrats on the new job!

[itsallgrand]

I'm so sorry for your loss Kwothe. That's quite a lot on your plate and changes and grief to manage as well, you deserve some grace! It actually sounds like you are doing quite a good job with all that considered.

I do find lists help me, part of that is the "brain dump" aspect where I can get it all from swirling in my mind to something solid on a paper. Then prioritize them - sometimes I just do stars beside the ones that come first, or number them. Others may be "nice to do today if I can, but not as important". Takes some stress off. 

Routine is good but can be difficult with swinging shifts. See what you can do to anchor the day regardless of the work on the table.

Cheering you on over here. Congrats on your job. 

[Cherylyn]

Time management is the answer and prioritizing your life.  Social media,  Internet, texting,  emails,  messages,  voicemails,  "nose in your phone,"  TV watching and all of it are huge time traps. ☹️

I've noticed that whenever I've taken Draconian measures with my life by eliminating time wasters,  suddenly I have time and energy for chores,  errands,  decluttering,  organizing,  cleaning,  ordering,  exercise,  hobbies and the like in addition to my work schedule.  Also,  no more late nights.  Get up earlier so you don't have to rush around in a frenzy.  Structure your life on a daily basis.  Have plans and adhere to it.  Being productive and industrious requires serious focus,  goals,  zero distractions,  no multi-tasking,  commitment and self discipline.  There is no other way to do it. 

I've learned to decline a lot.  I'm no longer so nice,  helpful and at people's beck and call at a moment's notice regarding my local relatives,  in-laws,  friends and acquaintances.  I schedule everything and if any request tends to be excessive or they think I'm at their disposal,  I politely and graciously decline.  You can't say "yes" to everything otherwise you'll never get anything done.  The day gets away from you.  The day jams up and before you know it,  you can't get around to doing what you needed to get done.  Your day ends without your goals due to wasting time. 

Be strict with your schedule and you can get things done.  It has worked for me and I hope it works for you, too.  👍  ☺️

[Capricorn3]

Just wanted to say so sorry for your loss Kwothe.  I wish you well.

[Cherylyn]

My condolences @Kwothe28😪 🙏

[catfeeder]

Very sorry for your loss, Kwothe. 

[Batya33]

12 hours ago, Capricorn3 said:

Just wanted to say so sorry for your loss Kwothe.  I wish you well.

The same from me - very sorry for your loss.  I am sorry I missed that part truly and yes I see you wrote it first - I am sorry.  May her memory be for a blessing.

I posted this last night and it didn't go through! I'm glad it did now -I hope.  Hope you got some good input here Kwok28!

[Kwothe28]

Thanks everyone.

23 hours ago, Batya33 said:

As a mom and working part time and doing most of the house cleaning/laundry/food prep/errands I hear you.  I like the checklist idea.  I live by my cleaning routines and school prep routines and I have reminders on my phone.  Many.  How about old fashion bribing yourself?

 

"Bribe" might be a good idea. I can do "If I dont do X then I wont get or do Y". Part of the problem is that I postpone activity as I get taken away by some different one. So it may help to put "paywall" on the other activity until I finish what I need to do. 

22 hours ago, itsallgrand said:

I do find lists help me, part of that is the "brain dump" aspect where I can get it all from swirling in my mind to something solid on a paper. Then prioritize them - sometimes I just do stars beside the ones that come first, or number them. Others may be "nice to do today if I can, but not as important". Takes some stress off. 

Routine is good but can be difficult with swinging shifts. See what you can do to anchor the day regardless of the work on the table.

 

Thanks. I do have an app for list that even has an alarm until when you need to do stuff. Never tried it for serious so I might do on daily basis and see how it goes., Its a nice idea with more urgent and less.

21 hours ago, Cherylyn said:

Time management is the answer and prioritizing your life.  Social media,  Internet, texting,  emails,  messages,  voicemails,  "nose in your phone,"  TV watching and all of it are huge time traps. ☹️

I've noticed that whenever I've taken Draconian measures with my life by eliminating time wasters,  suddenly I have time and energy for chores,  errands,  decluttering,  organizing,  cleaning,  ordering,  exercise,  hobbies and the like in addition to my work schedule.  Also,  no more late nights.  Get up earlier so you don't have to rush around in a frenzy.  Structure your life on a daily basis.  Have plans and adhere to it.  Being productive and industrious requires serious focus,  goals,  zero distractions,  no multi-tasking,  commitment and self discipline.  There is no other way to do it. 

Its true. For example I need to go to supermarket now instead of answering here lol. But will do right after. I do try, as for example I dont have much time now as before. I am not a fan of TV and barely watch it. But I do enjoy TV shows and movies on computer. But now I even "slack" with that as I dont have too much time now. I do get up very early, its part of my routine. But always postpone preparing for work at the last minute as I check messages, internet etc. Will try to reverse the order tomorrow to see how it goes. 

[Batya33]

5 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

"Bribe" might be a good idea. I can do "If I dont do X then I wont get or do Y". Part of the problem is that I postpone activity as I get taken away by some different one. So it may help to put "paywall" on the other activity until I finish what I need to do. 

If you do X you get to come to this site with a nice amount of popcorn....... 😉

[greendots]

Sorry for your loss, Kwothe.

 

[reinventmyself]

So sorry about your loss. Losing one's mother is such a profound experience.

I am all about lists.  I think I've developed some sort of ADD as I get older.  That and I have an issue of avoidance to begin with.  I have this weird thing where I feel this huge resistance to call people, whether friends or any sort of customer service related thing.  I will put it off as long as I can or conveniently forget. .  to my own detriment at times.

My job required me to reach out to all sorts of people every day.  I found post it's that were about 3x5 inch big and I would make a list and stick it to my desk.  If I didn't I could rationalize all sorts of reasons to not call.  But I needed a paycheck.   I felt so relieved when I could cross things off my list.  The post it's were helpful because then the list didn't mysteriously get buried in paperwork.

I do like the reward idea. . .giving that some thought.

[catfeeder]

7 hours ago, Kwothe28 said:

Part of the problem is that I postpone activity as I get taken away by some different one. So it may help to put "paywall" on the other activity until I finish what I need to do. 

Yes, this paywall is how I managed less desirable 'musts' like studies, freelance work or job seeking. Once I satisfied those investments on a given day, the rest was negotiable.

Stuff like laundry or groceries carries case-by-case negotiables. Do I want to stay awake, pay a few bills and then fold or hang laundry? OR, am I so tired that I'd prefer to play a quick game and then fall asleep? Do I have a plan for something I can eat tomorrow that will allow me to skip the grocery store tonight?

No answer is 'wrong'. So what is the benefit to imposing arbitrary suffering on my SELF whenever I simply behave as I wish on negotiable things?

The one priority I force is personal hygiene before anything else on mornings I must travel to work. I can set coffee to brew while I shower, then I can enjoy that with a quick breakfast while reading IF there is time. Otherwise, I pour a cup into a thermos and take breakfast with me--or I'll buy a breakfast--with plenty of time to get to work safely and without stress.

One premium I'll always reward with something special is taking a shower before bedtime. This buys me morning time, so whenever I can overcome my 'busy' resistance to pull this off at night, I reach for my biggest and best bribes.

Decide whether your pleasures come more from accomplishments or whether they come from factoring in some enjoyment of other things. No 'wrong' answer--just avoid self imposed misery whenever you decide against rigidity. This can be very liberating, and it can raise your overall JOY factor, even while you learn how to feel like a fabulous rebel!

[NighttimeNightmare]

Just wanted to add my sympathies. I’m very sorry about your mom.  Very difficult to lose a parent 

 

[Kwothe28]

10 hours ago, reinventmyself said:

I am all about lists.  I think I've developed some sort of ADD as I get older.  That and I have an issue of avoidance to begin with.  I have this weird thing where I feel this huge resistance to call people, whether friends or any sort of customer service related thing.  I will put it off as long as I can or conveniently forget. .  to my own detriment at times.

I like phone calls but have a hesitance about it. So I do them in bulk. Yesterday it was family friend birthday so phone o congratulate, heard uncle was at doctors checkup so called to see what he has done, phone few friends to see how they are doing etc. Its easier then with texts because I can talk to people nicely in few minutes then to spend an hour texting back and forth. But still need preparation to do it. 

Am "on schedule" today and done everything I wanted this morning on time. But setting up a list would maybe make it more effective on day to day basis. 

9 hours ago, catfeeder said:

No answer is 'wrong'. So what is the benefit to imposing arbitrary suffering on my SELF whenever I simply behave as I wish on negotiable things?

Yes its true. But I feel I "failed the task" as I didnt do it on imposed timeline. For example, I do have a fresh clean laundry and clothes to wear so failing to turn on washing machine isnt that big of a deal. But not doing it on time makes me agitated as I feel like I failed a video game quest. As I think that I should have done it in timely manner. That is why I was curious how is everybody else handling stuff like that as it bothers me a bit. 

Thanks everybody. 

[Batya33]

1 minute ago, Kwothe28 said:

I like phone calls but have a hesitance about it. So I do them in bulk. Yesterday it was family friend birthday so phone o congratulate, heard uncle was at doctors checkup so called to see what he has done, phone few friends to see how they are doing etc. Its easier then with texts because I can talk to people nicely in few minutes then to spend an hour texting back and forth. But still need preparation to do it. 

Am "on schedule" today and done everything I wanted this morning on time. But setting up a list would maybe make it more effective on day to day basis. 

Yes its true. But I feel I "failed the task" as I didnt do it on imposed timeline. For example, I do have a fresh clean laundry and clothes to wear so failing to turn on washing machine isnt that big of a deal. But not doing it on time makes me agitated as I feel like I failed a video game quest. As I think that I should have done it in timely manner. That is why I was curious how is everybody else handling stuff like that as it bothers me a bit. 

Thanks everybody. 

I am like that too.  I have to be told to cut myself slack. Last week my son had mono /husband was traveling part of the week/I was swamped with work/I had an annual medical appointment for me. I have a floor scrubbing routine during the week -specific floors, days/times.  Husband and son couldn't care less when/if I do them lol. 

My friend -my age but adult kids texted me commanding me to "screw house cleaning" lol.  Somehow I still did it because -for me -it makes me feel a little bit more "in order" when stuff is a bit chaotic.  But she was so right about cutting myself slack -it really bothers me! Are you concerned that if you don't do it in a timely manner you'll keep falling off till one day you'll be stopping at Walmart to buy a clean shirt before you get to the office? Or like that?

[catfeeder]

6 hours ago, Kwothe28 said:

... not doing it on time makes me agitated as I feel like I failed a video game quest. As I think that I should have done it in timely manner.

Okay, got it. In these cases, you get to set the levels of difficulty you are playing. So if you opt to create a super hard level on days that already challenge you, you'll have more fails. If you set the level to one you can finesse much easier, then you'll have more wins.

So maybe decide on ways to keep your levels of difficulty balanced so that you can 'win' more often, and then only add an occasional layer of difficulty on days when you feel like you can nail it.

If you think about it, this is like earning weapons and tools that you save up to throw at super hard levels.

[Kwothe28]

On 2/2/2024 at 12:12 PM, Batya33 said:

Are you concerned that if you don't do it in a timely manner you'll keep falling off till one day you'll be stopping at Walmart to buy a clean shirt before you get to the office? Or like that?

I always have a clean shirt so I am not worried about that. Its just that, I am worried work would pile up. I have few days of dishes which isnt too bad since I dont create them that much. And I love doing dishes so will do it today when I have more time since its weekend. But I still hate when I see the sink with lots of them. So I try not to postpone that kind of stuff too much. 

18 hours ago, catfeeder said:

So maybe decide on ways to keep your levels of difficulty balanced so that you can 'win' more often, and then only add an occasional layer of difficulty on days when you feel like you can nail it.

 

That is a good idea that should deffinitely try. Thanks. 

[Batya33]

Given your new work schedule would you consider using paper products/plastic utensils a bit more often? I know you don't mind doing dishes/enjoy it - but it's time consuming.

[Kwothe28]

1 hour ago, Batya33 said:

Given your new work schedule would you consider using paper products/plastic utensils a bit more often? I know you don't mind doing dishes/enjoy it - but it's time consuming.

Nah, paper plates and plastic forks are for parties where there is cake. I got used to glass/ceramic plate and metal forks.

[Batya33]

18 minutes ago, Kwothe28 said:

Nah, paper plates and plastic forks are for parties where there is cake. I got used to glass/ceramic plate and metal forks.

OK sounds good -totally respect your preferences. I do plastic for my son for sides and for his lunch box of course and rarely do paper -that's for road  trips/travel.  

[catfeeder]

6 hours ago, Kwothe28 said:

And I love doing dishes so will do it today when I have more time since its weekend. But I still hate when I see the sink with lots of them.

Ahhh! Okay, honey, I get you. As a fellow hand washer, I have ideas you might enjoy. These are super-fast and easy systems, yet possibly creepy in terms of germ-a-phobia. 🙂

First, I've created additional counter space by placing a giant cutting board over two side burners on my stove. (Easily moved when I need 4 burners.) This creates space for a lovely large, deep tray to one side of my sink, with the long side along the back. So my sink always remains empty. And shiny!

Since nursing school, I have a thing about anything 'mouth-worthy' directly touching a sink. During and after cooking, I rinse everything and place it in the tray, except utensils, which get tucked into a decorative cup. So nothing hardens, nothing stinks, nothing remains sitting in water.

When appropriate, I throw my rubber grid to the bottom of the sink, a rectangular washing tub on top of that, and as hot water fills, I dab a drop of bleach to decontaminate, then dish soap. I wash in batches--least greasy to most greasy. Everything was already rinsed so it goes directly into the hot water, except utensils for a later wash in a fresh refill.

There's something about a soak in scalding water that relaxes my mind about efficacy. Each batch is fast--I barely manipulate a sponge. I just doublecheck stuff like lipstick on glasses.

I don't wash 'over' the sink at the time of use because I WANT the soak. I have a dual-sided sponge that never touches any surface beyond tableware. Some people DO wash counters and sink with the same sponge that touches their dishes, and that makes me internally crazy. (SUmbody must show these people a germ video!!)

I don't have a disposal, so I've removed my typical drain stopper in favor of a very fine screen 'catcher' of all substances. I empty this screen into a paper towel that I store in a small garbage bag in my freezer. No smells, no attraction to ants or rodents, all clean until garbage take-out. The sink stopper is stored, should it be needed on rare occasions.