Chococat Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 Hello, I have been talking with this guy for 7 months now, lately it has been going really well. We have spoken pretty much every day for 7 months about various things. We are just long-distance friends and nothing more. Today, out of nowhere, he has totally ignored me! What do I do and what does this mean? He is still posting on his story and has seen my messages I sent to him. It doesn't make sense to me because he's been asking me questions, saying how we are alike and sharing jokes together a lot. In the last few weeks, we have really been getting along well. I feel confused and a bit upset about this. Any advice would be much appreciated. I haven't messaged again but just left him to it. I really don't know what to do because he is usually very responsive online. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 When did you last hear from him and how frequently do you usually communicate? Link to comment
Chococat Posted January 23 Author Share Posted January 23 I heard from his last night / yesterday and we communicate in many texts, several times a day! I responded to him this morning, he opened it, and nothing. Yet he posted on his story so I don't understand. We were laughing and I had responded to his question. It was all light-hearted, nothing serious! Link to comment
Coily Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 It's probably nothing. I think people get too focused on routine in this sort of situation. Take a step back, breathe relax, and reflect. Link to comment
Chococat Posted January 23 Author Share Posted January 23 I am confused because he has never done this before. We match each others efforts very well! I don't really understand. Link to comment
Coily Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 Since you are long distance, you won't really know if he has other things going on, don't sweat it. It's not fun wondering about all the IFs, but you don't have anything to go on other than public facing content, which is fluff in the gran scheme of life. Link to comment
Chococat Posted January 23 Author Share Posted January 23 That's true! I will leave him for now. Should I message him again if he doesn't reply in 48 hours or something like this or just leave him if he doesn't respond at all? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 10 minutes ago, Chococat said: I heard from his last night It's unclear why you are panicking. You never even met. Maybe he had something to do? 1 Link to comment
Coily Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 I'd say message after a while, there shouldn't be a rigid time line for interactions of this sort. If you want to message him after a while. Link to comment
Chococat Posted January 23 Author Share Posted January 23 I'm not panicking as much as i am confused, he could be doing something but he has been online a lot today and uploaded a couple of times. Thank you for your advice! I will come back here if there are any updates. He has uploaded again but still hasn't responded to me. He usually says something like "I can't reply right now." When he opens and message and is busy. Anyway, we will have to see. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 Is he single and if so how do you know? How do you know he is male? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 23 minutes ago, Chococat said: I'm not panicking. He has uploaded again but still hasn't responded to me. He usually says something like "I can't reply right now." He seems busy with something. Please calm down. He has a life outside of messaging you. 1 Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted January 23 Share Posted January 23 I don't see what the big deal is. He's doing other things, including uploading on his socials. He'll get back to you when he feels like it. Nothing confusing there. It sounds as though you are far too invested in this person and the messaging, so I would take this as a sign that you should dial it back. You seem to have built up some expectations of him and there is not much wiggle room before your anxiety kicks in. What would you do if he just lets this online friendship fizzle? 1 Link to comment
Jaunty Posted January 24 Share Posted January 24 I agree with the advice to dial it back. What friends actually communicate multiple times EVERY DAY? It's not sustainable. Sooner or later one of you will start dating someone and that will really put the brakes on this texting extravaganza. I think you should get used to less frequency. 1 Link to comment
Jaunty Posted January 25 Share Posted January 25 On 1/23/2024 at 7:06 AM, Chococat said: That's true! I will leave him for now. Should I message him again if he doesn't reply in 48 hours or something like this or just leave him if he doesn't respond at all? What do you have to say? That would probably be the deciding factor. 1 Link to comment
Tinydance Posted January 25 Share Posted January 25 Well I think in real life you wouldn't be talking to a friend every single day literally all day. You might chat a lot but they still need to live their life as well. He probably has other friends, a job, hobbies, errands to run, etc. If you guys are supposed to be only friends then I don't think it's actually healthy to be talking 24/7. It's OK if you want to message him but I think you need to lower your expectations and not expect that he'll text back constantly. Maybe he's dating someone and she noticed he talks to you a lot and got jealous. Or maybe he's just realised that spending all his time only talking to you is actually unsustainable. It doesn't mean he wants to ditch you but he probably wants to do other things too. 1 Link to comment
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