Chapter 3

[mylolita]

46 minutes ago, dias said:

Thanks 🙂 No it's my parents house, they hired an architect, designed it and built it from scratch when I was a teenager. It took about 7 years lol It's a beautiful big house but it's an hour outside of Athens, not close to amenities so not for me. I grew up in an apartment, the one I am living right now.

Yes tall ceilings are very important. Same square feet, tall ceiling vs short ceiling -> completely different. In the picture it's the basement where the ceiling is 10 foot exactly (good guess 🙂 ). The ceilings in the rest of the floors are about 30cm shorter. Only 30cm and it's a huge difference. Yes I remember, yours have very tall ceilings too. 10 foot or more?

Yes I was referring to the photo you have with the island where there is a cabinet behind🙂 I prefer islands myself instead of worktop space around of the walls. It's more stylish. Plus, it's cool when you bring guests and you can drink your cocktails there!!!I love islands! 

You know you have exquisite taste and a beautiful house! Don't be modest hahahaha 🙂

Now that's new to me. I didn't know someone can be picky with taps lol I don't know any tap brands but if you like them they must be the best!

They are quite tasty… the taps 🌚🤣 And showers as well. Any kind of “bathroom furniture” they call it. I’ll send a picture on if you’re interested although it’s not going to blow you away; I will pre-warn ya 🥹 I’m simply a traditionalist doing my traditional thing with my mahogany loo seat 🚽 LOL! (This is instead of going on holidays!) 

 

You’re too kind Dias; you really are! And by the way, I forgot to say that, if you call that messy? Holy smokes. I’m hailed as a neat and hyper hygienic kinda gal but if I’ve dared lounge in bed with a coffee for half an hour you should see what the rooms look like after hyperactive 6am trio of chiddlers have done their best 🥲🤣 

 

I think it’s amazing your parents built their own house! I’d like to hear more about it actually!!! The ins and outs! 
 

And yes! Our last house was very grand. I never really said anything much whilst I was in it, but it was pretty special. It was part of a Georgian crescent. Think the ones in the town of Bath. The terrace at the end of our row had a ball room in it. Looking back, it kind of took my breath away; but I was in it constantly for 7 years and it’s very spoilt what you get used to and pretty quickly at that. And yes, the ceilings there were 12 foot plus, I don’t know the exact height, and 11 foot here in this house, although in the previous house that had a basement, the ceilings got much lower (probably a standard height of around 9ish foot? Same with the top floor in the attic which had been originally servant quarters). 
 

These have both been huge renovations by the way Dias which is why we were able to buy them in the first place! And we haven’t fully finished this one yet (I have a spare room to do, and part of the attic, and I want to buy about 6 large lilac trees to make a little avenue in the back yard. Nagging the husband to pick me up some big antique pots at the next fair! And some garden furniture!) 

 

Because we’re by the sea, we need to replace the front door. At the mo I painted the old one in a dark, deep, “British racing green” and I’d love to get a big brass star fish as a door knocker! It has a historic meaning to our little family as our family tradition has it, we go rock pooling with the kids and pick up star fish! Some are BIG BOYS! 🤣 Whoppers they are! 
 

Anyway, shut up Lo - as you know, I could talk house all year. Not just mine! Generally! I might have a void once this one is done. There’s a Victorian attic flat that has come up for sale. The views are absolutely phenomenal. I briefly saw the estate agent photo’s and my mind started the manic chaos! I wanted to buy that thing so bad Dias, do it up quickly, but with quality and some unique attentions to detail and then rent it out. But at the moment, the hubby is ploughing all funds back into the business to try built it back up. Doing up this house has cost more than we thought (always does, I bet you and your parents know about this!) and well, we need to re-coupe. Anyway, maybe in the future. Who knows! Who knows. 
 

And I will say, you mentioning the ceiling height making an astronomical difference? It’s so true. My favourite, absolute favourite era of architecture has to be Georgian, and I say this because of their elegant proportions, but mostly, and especially, because of their use and love of LIGHT! And SPACE! And those elongated, delicate sash windows? And common place ceiling height which would now seem beyond luxurious! I could go on! I have me a thing for the Georgians! 
 

But, I also have a fetish, I have to say, for the Georgian cottage. And, the first house we ever shacked up in together, well, my husband had it when he met me - was a tiny ancient cottage. They will always hold a special place in my heart! This one was actually 15th century!!!! God I wish I’d took pictures! It was like something from a fairy tale! Stooping barn doors and forget me nots winding around the cobbled path. Aged oak beams bending higgled like into the ceiling! Very low ceilings and tiny windows. I used to arrange gypsophila in bottle green vases on the tiny window sills. It had the most peaceful quality of anywhere we’ve ever been.

 

God! Honestly, it is boring I know. You had to experience it to believe it. One day, if I ever can, I’ll go back and buy it too. Wow, all these properties I’m supposedly buying up huh? 🤣🤣🤣 The fantasy portfolio!!! HA! 
 

I’d love the TOUR DAHLING but I understand - it’s personal! 
 

By the way… please don’t get the wrong impression. I like a bit of luxury, I won’t deny, but I’m a very down to earth kinda gal for the most part, and definitely no snob. Not head to toe in designer clothing or anything like that. I think I plough the majority into the interior and of course the kids. So, there is no need to impress. I’m curious about so many different aspects of very opposite interiors. I have a thing for gardens too. I could go on 🤣 Another time! 
 

Thanks Dias 🥲

 

x

[dias]

32 minutes ago, mylolita said:

Most men would just make the BEST OnlyFans “content creators” if they could magically be women for the week, and wouldn’t feel depressed or degraded about it one smidge.

 

I always think my husband would do very well and he’d be such a little sl*g. A perfect natural 🤣🤣🤣

I believe most men would like to be objectified haha. I would certainly like to be treated like a piece of meat and get paid about it. What's better than twerking your hairy peachy heinie and seeing your bank account balance increase at the same time hahahaha. Ah, one can only dream!

 

 

[dias]

9 minutes ago, dias said:

I believed most men would like to be objectified haha. I would certainly like to be treated like a piece of meat and get paid about it. What's better than twerking your hairy peachy heinie and seeing your bank account balance increase at the same time hahahaha. Ah, one can only dream!

 

 

 

[mylolita]

35 minutes ago, dias said:

I believe most men would like to be objectified haha. I would certainly like to be treated like a piece of meat and get paid about it. What's better than twerking your hairy peachy heinie and seeing your bank account balance increase at the same time hahahaha. Ah, one can only dream!

 

 

LMAOOOO! 
 

Role reversal - secretly, most men would love to be objectified and women wish a young guy would just use ‘em for their money 🤣🤣🤣

 

🥂 x

[mylolita]

28 minutes ago, dias said:

 

LMAOOOOOO! 

[mylolita]

@dias!

 

”Women women women… why was I born handsome instead o’rich?” 🤣

[dias]

I was discussing an interesting topic with a childhood friend of mine (the only real friend I have) the other day. He studied Physical Therapy and did a master's degree in the UK for kids with disabilities as he didn't want to become a personal trainer. He didn't actually work on his field whilst in the UK, he worked in retail. When he came back to Greece he tried to work on his field and he did for a while but he didn't like job and the money was sh*t. He was unemployed for quite a bit until there was no other solution than to find a job. He got a job in a warehouse, he got promoted to assistant store manager recently but obviously the money is still not enough. He is pretty good in a structured environment which wasn't the same with the field he studied since you need to be a self-starter and chase it alone if you want to make something out of it. 

Anyway, he thinks it was very bad that his parents raised him to do whatever he likes. He said his father should have told him what to study that is actually something practical and that allows you to have a decent income. The reality is, doing "what you like" is 95%+ not practical. Yes there is a small percentage of people who can pursue what they like and make money (we are talking about a normal salary not 6 figures+). Most of the people from my high school work in retail or something similar. Many of those studied at good universities but never pursued what they studied. The only person relatively successful from our class was a guy who his mother "beat him up" to study hard to become a doctor. Eventually he became a doctor (like he had an option lol). I see young guys and gals about 20-23 in the dance school and they don't want to pursue what they studied. They want to figure out what they like first. Sometimes I chuckle nowadays. 

As a person who would have preferred not to study at the university as it wasn't for me and would have liked to do something on my own, I can see both sides. I tried to do my own thing with side hustles and so far nothing. With the exception of my Youtube channel everything else didn't work. I have also changed 7 companies and I have been in the workforce 8 years until I found something I liked and also deserved given my qualifications. Still, I don't do what I like. It's very difficult to do something you like and make a living if this something is not one of the most foolproof choices. Even as an engineer it took me many years to earn a good salary. Imagine something else. Thing is, unless someone shows you the way and you have to figure it out alone, it's extremely difficult. 99% of the cases this someone is your parents. Now the problem is, your parents know only up to the level they have reached themselves. My father is an engineer, my mother was an officer in the Navy so they pushed me each to his/her domain. It was either engineer or the Navy for me and my brother. It was not that we couldn't pick something else but what the heck do you know at 16-17 when you were raised in a protected environment. You know less than nothing. What decisions can you make when you know less than nothing? Every decision would be like spinning the roulette wheel. 

At 32 I can say I have figured it out to a good extend (this process would never stop obviously) but I have tried and experienced so many different things which came with a price. It's true, it's about working smart not hard. Working smart includes so many intangible skills which is no small feat to reach that level to begin with. My father instilled in me the typical "if you work hard you will get ahead in life". I mean, now, I think if someone says something like this either he wants you to suffer for no reason or he is plain stupid. Sometimes I want to go to the local school, barge in the classroom and tell the kids to never listen to their teachers or parents because they know sh*t most of them. 

Back to my friend, he was raised to do whatever he likes, it didn't go very well. I was raised with a father who wanted me to become an engineer and work in the corporate world which I hate, it didn't go that well either. Apparently, it also depends on the personalities, I might have done better with his parents and he might have done better with my parents. Hmm, I guess people are never happy either way lol

 

[Batya33]

I was raised to do whatever I liked and with a strong emphasis on educational values like college and beyond.  Also a strong emphasis on making a living (my sister at one point in her teenage years wanted to be a "humanitarian").  We regularly discussed how for example I loved to write creatively (still do!) but how hard it is to make a living as a writer.  Same with my sister's vocal/acting talents.  But we were encouraged to pursue as a hobby, etc.  Husband was raised the same. Our parents had tons in common/very similar that way (only mom is still living).  

I don't talk about what I did after elementary school teaching (what awful pay -so unfair) - on here but for sure for the 15 years I did that full time I socked away the $ and built a significant nest egg which has benefited me and my family indirectly so very much given that doing what I like also included SAHM which I did and liked a lot for over 5 of the 7 years I did so -liked the last 1.5 years too but also was ready to return to my prior career in some capacity which I did.  And which I also like.  My husband didn't like his first career much and it was very lucrative. So he pursued a different career in his 30s which also is lucrative.  For the last 24 years he's liked it very much and makes a really good living.  

I know many artists of all types including famous artists of all types.  I respect art and artists (and I'm including in that writers/actors/visual artists) -I've also worked with many artists.  I do see what a tough path it is and how hard it is to persist, to be successful.  I have a few friends publishing their first novel in their 40s and 50s but for many years they made a good living doing other things.  I wouldn't recommend that a person pursue being an artist without - a trust fund basically -with rare exception - even if they like it. I feel awful saying that but I'm practical minded that way.  

I also think it's unfair to blame parents for all of it- adults can forge their own path whatever the message was and often the message was far more nuanced/layered than based on hindsight/memory.  

My son and I -and my husband -talk quite often about college and career plans -I think he's past the "I want to be a youtube star" phase.  He's 15.  

[itsallgrand]

Guidance is so important. My mom was a wonderful nurturing person, but she just didn't know as far as the nuts and bolts of pursuing a career. She was incredibly lenient - self start or die lol. My SO grew up somewhat opposite. All the $$ and guidance, but felt like his parents were less warm and lean on the acceptance side. 

I don't envy parents the job. It's a very wide breadth of skills you need to bring to the table to do it right. And even then, people ultimately do what they want!

 

 

[Batya33]

1 minute ago, itsallgrand said:

Guidance is so important. My mom was a wonderful nurturing person, but she just didn't know as far as the nuts and bolts of pursuing a career. She was incredibly lenient - self start or die lol. My SO grew up somewhat opposite. All the $$ and guidance, but felt like his parents were less warm and lean on the acceptance side. 

I don't envy parents the job. It's a very wide breadth of skills you need to bring to the table to do it right. And even then, people ultimately do what they want!

 

 

Yes and they keep updating the parenting manual! Wait there is no manual. Yet we get blamed. I like leading by example -I tell my son about my work, about work situations and how I handle them, he sees that I ignore him if I'm on deadline and his um request is not an emergency.  He sees that I and my husband mostly like and enjoy what we do and we like making a contribution.  But we don't get all lecture-y or didactic about what he should do with his life, for education or work.  If he shares stuff we give input but again not heavy handed. 

[itsallgrand]

4 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Yes and they keep updating the parenting manual! Wait there is no manual. Yet we get blamed. I like leading by example -I tell my son about my work, about work situations and how I handle them, he sees that I ignore him if I'm on deadline and his um request is not an emergency.  He sees that I and my husband mostly like and enjoy what we do and we like making a contribution.  But we don't get all lecture-y or didactic about what he should do with his life, for education or work.  If he shares stuff we give input but again not heavy handed. 

I think that's a great balanced approach.

No matter what you do, he will finds flaws at a certain age lol. Then come back around to seeing how there is no perfect parent, impossible. 

[yogacat]

You have to find something you love. I was making the equivalent of 6 figures at one point with no formal education and I hated it.

I decided to go back to school to pursue a career in the healthcare industry because that's what I'm passionate about. I worked for someone that was dying from a rare form of Dementia, and I'm super sad he passed but that was the most fulfilling and special times in my life. Albeit, it was challenging at times and my patience was tested.

I know it sounds corny but there is nothing better than not caring about what I made because I was doing something I was passionate about. Don't do something that makes you miserable for a few extra dollars. You'll be getting paid regardless, may as well like what you're doing.

[dias]

Very interesting day today, I had a new experience. The head of the department from the client's side scheduled an impromptu (for me) call. I thought she wanted to get feedback about the project. She started with "unfortunately I have some bad news"! ok I thought here we go! The client is running out of budget so someone had to be booted lol 

Now this is the nature of the business since I am working at a consultancy so it was not something I didn't expect but I didn't expect it now. Last week the project manager from our side told me everything is going great etc etc. Strangely I found it a bit comical, just calling you out of the blue and telling you ok you were good bye bye now. Like in the movies lol. 

I didn't like the project so I took it pretty well to be honest, however, I was planning to have a pleasant summer and then search for another client. This turned my plans for the summer upside down. I need to update my CV again, prepare for interviews, revise code etc etc which is a pain in the rear and I wasn't in the mood to do that now. We have the performance in July in the dance school and I wanted to focus there more but hey sh*t happen and work is the more important. 

[dias]

I think I would feel stressed. I don't. And I don't understand why. I am scratching my head. Just dropping the worries as I am getting older? Dunno. Let's see what the future brings. 

[Batya33]

23 minutes ago, dias said:

I think I would feel stressed. I don't. And I don't understand why. I am scratching my head. Just dropping the worries as I am getting older? Dunno. Let's see what the future brings. 

Onwards and upwards!!

[mylolita]

4 hours ago, dias said:

I think I would feel stressed. I don't. And I don't understand why. I am scratching my head. Just dropping the worries as I am getting older? Dunno. Let's see what the future brings. 

Sorry to hear this Dias but actually, really, I don’t feel too sorry. Y’know, this could be a veiled opportunity! 
 

I know you appreciate some levity… let’s have a laugh at the work place OFFICE and it’s delicious little daft arse bureaucracy shall we? 🥲

 

 

🍄 

[dias]

15 hours ago, mylolita said:

Sorry to hear this Dias but actually, really, I don’t feel too sorry. Y’know, this could be a veiled opportunity! 
 

I know you appreciate some levity… let’s have a laugh at the work place OFFICE and it’s delicious little daft arse bureaucracy shall we? 🥲

 

 

🍄

You exceeded our expectations that's why we put you below expectations. Hahaha Hahahahaha 

[mylolita]

6 minutes ago, dias said:

You exceeded our expectations that's why we put you below expectations. Hahaha Hahahahaha 

They need those pools God dammit!!! 

[dias]

Maybe it's good they booted me now because I don't like the new team/project anyways. I don't learn anything new, the tasks are boring and I don't mix well with the people. There are not *ssholes or anything, we just have different communication styles and completely different way of working so they end up irritating me (probably I irritate them too). Two weeks left and I have to start applying for new projects. There is always pressure to find another client as soon as possible because if you sit without a project for long eventually they will boot you from the consultancy. 

Wouldn't be nice making a proper salary from the Youtube channel or having my own consultancy so I wouldn't care? Ah, that would be awesome. Giving them a nice middle finger!

Now I have to care despite the fact I am not in the mood of going through stupid interviews again, re-iterating the same b*ll*** and taking stupid coding tests. 

 

[dias]

On a different subject, I have deleted the dating apps which is nice as they are distractions and time-wasters but now the dating pool is even smaller. I tried to start a conversation with the gal at the reception at the gym as she glanced a few times, I asked about memberships and the playlists etc, she was polite but that was that. I didn't ask her to get a coffee because I knew the answer.

Well, the streets are difficult no doubt. Without dating apps, either you have big groups of friends where everyone is bringing other people and you meet gals this way or then it's the hard way. The only good thing about the hard way is that you go talk to the ones you like but otherwise it's a mountain to climb. 

It's exactly like trying to find a very good job without knowing anyone. Since I have been doing it years now and I know the process well, it's very difficult. Even with experience I send thousands of CVs and have double digit number of interviews before I land a job. And it was only two times in my life I got the job I wanted. Not easy at all. 

Of course some people naturally have it easier. They don't need to approach 100 girls to get one positive answer and they don't have to apply to 100 jobs to get one. We all know life is unfair and we would like to be like them but doesn't happen for everyone. 

I remember when I was promoting my mobile app in Liverpool years ago. I remember I sent thousands of marking campaigns to stores and business angels and nothing. So I had to do it the old school way. Designed and printed flyers, prepared sales-pitches (that didn't really work lol) and visited all the retail stores/restaurants/pubs in Liverpool.  That was so old school. I remember the reactions of people, some didn't care even to listen to me, some closed the door in my face, some listened but where not interested, some listened and they told me to come again another time, some threw my flyers to the bin in front of me (that hurt because I designed and paid for the flyers myself), some already had a similar app, some "mocked" me etc. I counted the number of stores I visited to see when someone would say yes. It took about 80 stores. Eventually, 3 popular restaurants and 3 pubs singed in the app (which was free anyway). Then covid hit and everything shut down. But I remember the feeling of getting rejected so many times and so rudely, it's not nice at all. People say that you shouldn't get influenced by that. Yeah, right, in a parallel universe maybe. Constant rejection is going to affect you (at least most people), it makes you question your self-worth. Yes, you should continue doing it until you get a positive answer but it's way easier said than done. Of course, when I got my first client, my adrenaline level skyrocketed. Certainly one of the key moments of my life. I don't think I have ever been more excited than that day. Now, aside from Covid there was no actual business plan behind so it wouldn't work anyway but achieving only 0.5% of what could be a life-long journey was no small feat. Certainly my proudest moment in life. 

Wow, I digressed with the Liverpool memories. Anyway, approaching women the old school way is equally hard at least for me. You get the same reactions and although I know the game and it does not affect me that much, it is still not easy to beat the numbers game and it's not enjoyable getting rejected. There is no other way for me since I don't have groups of friends. I am really paying the price of being a loner. In the next life I wish I would be a peoples person. 

[Batya33]

I think it depends how you define rejection and what is being rejected -you as a person? By a stranger or near stranger? You as a dating prospect? Maybe but it's typically just -no click.  Nothing personal.  It's not enjoyable not getting a date but typically it's not rejecting you as a person.  It's like how in making friends sometimes the conversation just flows and then with a person you assume it will -it's -dead/cold.  Also if someone doesn't like your looks or find your looks attractive enough to want to go on a date- ok -so - again whatever.  I don't mean to get all pollyannish -there are people who have it much much easier when it comes to finding dates (although that doesn't mean easier in finding long term) -saw it over and over again, still do.

Life isn't fair -sometimes karma kicks in and it feels really good.

Good luck and obviously no need to do dating apps if  you don't feel like it!!  Hope you get some interviews with project people who deserve to have you. 

[dias]

Definitely watching this in the cinema! Brass knuckles are so cool, cooler than guns!

 

[mylolita]

5 hours ago, dias said:

Definitely watching this in the cinema! Brass knuckles are so cool, cooler than guns!

 

You won’t need too cos we’ve seen the whole thing now anyway 🤣🤣

 

x

[mylolita]

30 minutes ago, dias said:

Lol ok the trailer revealed the whole story. But you know you don't go to watch this kind of films because of their scenarios. You go because they are cool movies with cool actors! Is one of those actors Tom Hardy? Big fan here since his MMA movie a decade ago.

Not gonna say either way 🤫

Just realised I have security gone and gave the game away and edited my above! WHAT AM I LIKE!
 

And I’m just joking 😘 It actually looks like a really great film, specially for the cinema! Cool date film, y’know 😎

 

x

[dias]

A project manager is ignoring my messages these days. He was supposed to give me an update since the client is letting me go. He was supposed to tell me this in the first place, not the client. I get very irritated when people ignore me for no reason. When they want something they are lovely, when they don't they ignore you. He pinged me a week ago that he is searching for another project with the same client, I believe he said it just to say something which was not necessary. This irritates me the most, saying something just to say something. Don't f*cking say it. I am searching for new client anyways but I wanted to get a clear answer from him. 

Clear answer...Ha...in this world... what am I thinking...