Lambert Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 I should be clear..... I said we just met, not dating exactly. He did say he was not ready for dating but he liked me and we were hanging out, and yes, sleeping together. Still I feel like I should not have had to endure that.Girlfriend, get out of this situation today! Do not allow yourself to be used to heal him. I'm not saying hes a total jerk. He might not realise he's doing it. Its on YOU to realise it and stop it. Long term this will heal him, but destroy you! Link to comment
boltnrun Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 If you don't feel you should have to endure it, then don't endure it! And if he thinks you're being judgmental or mean, well, sorry! I can't imagine him saying "how dare you not lie in bed with me and listen to me whine about my ex wife!" Link to comment
DancingFool Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 A guy who will badmouth his ex to you soon enough will badmouth you to someone else. Beware and consider that this guy is not anywhere near as nice as you'd like to believe. Also, he'll sleep with you but won't date you??? WTH? Just walk away. Overall, do avoid getting involved with damaged people. You know there is nothing normal about him going on about his ex while in bed with you. Don't ever get caught up in the idea that if only you accommodate him, sleep with him, comfort him, listen to his drivel and prove to him what a good woman you are that he will eventually upgrade you to gf position. It doesn't work like that. You are more like a crutch that will get discarded the moment the broken leg is healed. Have you ever seen a person still using crutches after their leg is fully healed? No. Same thing. All you'll get for your efforts is....nothing...... If you want a healthy loving relationship, then seek a man who is healthy and ready to date today. Then at least you have a chance to build something good. With this guy, you have nothing. Not even a fun fling as listening to him whine about his ex doesn't sound like fun. Link to comment
Lambert Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 A guy who will badmouth his ex to you soon enough will badmouth you to someone else. Beware and consider that this guy is not anywhere near as nice as you'd like to believe. Also, he'll sleep with you but won't date you??? WTH? Just walk away. Overall, do avoid getting involved with damaged people. You know there is nothing normal about him going on about his ex while in bed with you. Don't ever get caught up in the idea that if only you accommodate him, sleep with him, comfort him, listen to his drivel and prove to him what a good woman you are that he will eventually upgrade you to gf position. It doesn't work like that. You are more like a crutch that will get discarded the moment the broken leg is healed. Have you ever seen a person still using crutches after their leg is fully healed? No. Same thing. All you'll get for your efforts is....nothing...... If you want a healthy loving relationship, then seek a man who is healthy and ready to date today. Then at least you have a chance to build something good. With this guy, you have nothing. Not even a fun fling as listening to him whine about his ex doesn't sound like fun.Right on, DF! Love the fun fling callout at the end. Who doesn't love a good fun fling! Link to comment
figureitout23 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Right on, DF! Love the fun fling callout at the end. Who doesn't love a good fun fling! Agree. A blind man can see this isn’t just sex for you, cause of it was he’d have to have superhuman skills and body parts. The equivalent would be me going to a car wash where they wet my car with dirty water and didn’t bother vacuuming the inside, yeah technically I’m getting my car washed but I’m not benefitting from it. The only benefit is feeding your own brokenness, which it appears you’re doing. Link to comment
SooSad33 Posted February 7, 2020 Share Posted February 7, 2020 I suggest you do not 'give him any friendly advice', except that you can't do this with him HE needs to realize & accept he is NOT over his ex at this time. ( rebounding). Whether re: memories or anger. He is not relationship material. Friends.. no more. For your own sanity. He just can't do it.. Hope he realizes this. Link to comment
DaisyMayPorter Posted February 7, 2020 Share Posted February 7, 2020 Girlfriend, get out of this situation today! Do not allow yourself to be used to heal him. I'm not saying hes a total jerk. He might not realise he's doing it. Its on YOU to realise it and stop it. Long term this will heal him, but destroy you! Agree! He probably doesn't even realizing he's doing it. But you realize it, and it's not fair to you! Link to comment
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