Sunflower93 Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 I'm crying while writing this so sorry if there's typos i can't really see. Basically I broke up with my ex in June been NC since September he texted me once to say his dog died I said sorry that was it. If you read my other threads you know he was really really bad for me, he hurt me to the point where I didn't want to live anymore, and then left after breadcrumbing me all summer and watching my heart shatter. I have been trying my absolute hardest to find myself and my inner strength and beauty. I haven't dated or even talked to guys. I've been 100% working on myself and have been getting happier and less heartbroken. Now he finally crawled out of whatever hole he was in and texted me on a new number (he's been blocked in every capacity). He immediately went from hi to come over to I wanna do you. This hurt me so much bc he was my first love (I'm 24) and I thought we were both in love. Now he just keeps showing me it was only me. He tried adding my cousin and best friend on Facebook and messaged them both, then added me and both of them on Snapchat. He messaged my cousin who he knows is the closest person to me and told her he always wanted to do stuff to her and still does. I cannot bring to words the pain I feel right now. I loved this man with my whole heart, I thought we would get married and have children. I loved him despite his many many flaws. How could I be so worthless to him?How could he violate me so horribly? Ive never been treated this disgustingly wicked in all my life. I just want to know how I will ever get past this pain. I was doing good now the relationship I relive over and over in my dreams every night is being brought back up and twisted into such an ugly lie. Now I feel like every time he said he loved me and he finally found me was a lie. I didn't think my heart could break any more it was barely beating to begin with. Link to comment
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