How Should I Return My Ex-Gf's Parents' Things To Them?

[ironpony]

I broke up with my last gf a year ago almost and as I was doing a lot of cleaning now, I found some of her parents things that I forgot I had, mostly cause I didn't want to go into my ex's things, and was fed up and wanted to not deal with it. But I have some of her parents things and I don't want her parents to think I took them, or never bothered to return them.

 

However, I feel that if I give them to my ex, it's just going to be trouble. When he broke up, she posted on facebook about how I hit when I broke up with her to everyone, which didn't happen. She also emailed me and accused me of raping her in the relationship, and made me feel terrible and I don't know if she would have told her parents that or not. I am guessing her parents very well could have seen that she posted that I hit her on the break up.

 

I wrote about our relationship problems before in these past threads:

 

 

 

 

 

I thought it might be best to return her parents belongings indirectly. My ex has a friend that still talks to me on social media sometimes, and she said she feels she is friends with both of us. She doesn't want to choose a side, and I don't want her to, at all.

 

I just felt that if I explained that I want to give my exs' parents' things back them, and thought she could do it, since m ex will not talk to me about it, maybe she could give them back for me, or something.

 

But what do you think, or how should I go about it?

[Keyman]

Put it all in a box, drive to their house, put it on their front door step and drive away.

[pippy longstocking]

Put it all in a box, drive to their house, put it on their front door step and drive away.

 

either this ^^^^^

 

or just throw the lot away ..... when someone accuses you of the things she has , it means she will continue the drama and the accusations no matter what you do , so you have to think about you and only you .

[Knight2001]

hi,

i agree with pippy, either dump them on the doorstep and drive away or throw them away/donate them to a charity shop.

they cant need them badly if they've done without them for so long.

[MissCanuck]

If they haven't asked for them nearly a year after the break-up, I don't think they miss whatever items you have.

 

Either donate or throw them away. If you can't bring yourself to do that, box it up and give it to the mutual friend. I would probably opt for the former, given the fact that her parents obviously aren't that bothered either.

[melancholy123]

You can pack it all up and leave it on their doorstep, send it by mail our courier, donate to a thrift store, or toss in the garbage. You dont say what these things are or if they have value, and since it's been a year they probably aren't worth much.

[DancingFool]

Best option for avoiding ALL drama and potential for drama is pack them up and have a friend drop them off or best of all, ship them with tracking so they can never come after you for destroying their property or try to bring about that kind of drama. Put it under money well spent heading and move on with your life.

[HeartGoesOn]

I'd let sleeping dogs lie, and continue to move forward. If they needed those items, they would have found a way to contact you, especially over the span of a year.

[abitbroken]

It depends on what they are. If they are sentimental items like pictures, a tool that was grandpa's or high value items, you need to return them. If its some everyday cheap think like a spatula - let sleeping dogs lie and review if you want to do this just to contact her.

 

And i disagree with "if they had wanted them, they would have asked for them". My ex has things that are deeply sentimental to me and I cried over the fact that I didn't have them -- but being safe was more important. They are small things that i wasn't able to grab in the heat of the moment. If he decided to return them, I would have been very happy. Also, they could be things that the daughter had been using and they don't know where they ended up.

 

If its is something important or high monetary value, i would let the friend be the go between

[ironpony]

either this ^^^^^

 

or just throw the lot away ..... when someone accuses you of the things she has , it means she will continue the drama and the accusations no matter what you do , so you have to think about you and only you .

 

That's true, but some of these are her parents things are her parents were really good people to me, and I don't feel that they deserve to loose their stuff on account of what she did, if that makes sense.

[MissCanuck]

That's true, but some of these are her parents things are her parents were really good people to me, and I don't feel that they deserve to loose their stuff on account of what she did, if that makes sense.

 

It makes sense, but I think you are over-estimating the importance of these items to them. It's been a year and they haven't come looking for them.

 

What is it that you have, exactly?

[ironpony]

I have some blankets and an umbrella. I just feel it's a matter of principle, and don't like taking stuff from good people as a matter of principle (her parents, not her). Even if the items are replaceable, they still theirs I feel.