Father's visitation rights?

[ZeddsDed]

Supervised means supervised by a third party, not you, and court order means that you don't get a vote.

 

If he violates the protection order again, dial 911 immediately, and don't let him in.

 

Report this violation to your lawyer to learn whether it can be raised in court without penalizing you for not contacting the police.

I understand that much, but my counsellor was saying there has been lots of ways that the abuser has tried to sneak contact in through the visits. Waiting around outside when the abused come to pick up children etc..

Eventually it will be court ordered strictly by a judge, yes. But the court date coming up is a review of the EPO. Meaning I go to state what I want to happen. He can either accept or contest which will decide on further court hearings.

 

I did report everything to the police so far, so that's not a concern for me also.

[ZeddsDed]

Yes = its not like it was ONE incident. It was a pattern of behavior. Believe me, my abusive ex changed for a few weeks and then was back to his ways bigger than ever. He doesn't know how to act any other way and you need to protect your children. If the court leaves it up to YOU if he can see the kids -- then you keep saying NO until they give you no choice. Extend the protective order as far out as you can. He is not a good man if he physically abused his pregnant wife. To me, that should warrant no contact for life. If the kids decide to know their father at 18 there is little you can do, but for now -- he is not a changed man.

I agree 100%. We have been though this situation before, not quite as serious with police involved but I have left and heard all these cries before. He seemed really sincere then too, but within literally a week he slipped back into old ways.

I'm still feeling really emotional and upset on the supervised visits or no contact at all. I feel so much pressure from family members to allow the supervised visits they don't agree with me stopping them from seeing him in a safe environment.

 

I'm trying to not let that sway me at all, but it's really hard and complicated.

The court date is tomorrow and I'm starting to feel nerves. More So, because he will be there. I know that I always crumble under pressure when he is around. He makes me feel weak and it doesn't help that I will be basically waiting with him to go into the room.

I'm starting to feel really nervous!

[Seraphim]

Remember this is about your kids. Their very lives and their mental health .

[ZeddsDed]

Remember this is about your kids. Their very lives and their mental health .

Thank you for the reminder. Xx

[abitbroken]

I agree 100%. We have been though this situation before, not quite as serious with police involved but I have left and heard all these cries before. He seemed really sincere then too, but within literally a week he slipped back into old ways.

I'm still feeling really emotional and upset on the supervised visits or no contact at all. I feel so much pressure from family members to allow the supervised visits they don't agree with me stopping them from seeing him in a safe environment.

 

I'm trying to not let that sway me at all, but it's really hard and complicated.

The court date is tomorrow and I'm starting to feel nerves. More So, because he will be there. I know that I always crumble under pressure when he is around. He makes me feel weak and it doesn't help that I will be basically waiting with him to go into the room.

I'm starting to feel really nervous!

 

Remember, they are looking from the outside. But i would remind mom and dad, if they are the ones encouraging you that he did attack you physically and that the kids are thriving without him and to respect your wishes.

 

you extend the no visitation for as long as you possibly can. Stay strong, Momma!

[abitbroken]

==

The court date is tomorrow and I'm starting to feel nerves. More So, because he will be there. I know that I always crumble under pressure when he is around. He makes me feel weak and it doesn't help that I will be basically waiting with him to go into the room.

I'm starting to feel really nervous!

 

Why not tell your attorney or counselor this. Possibly, they can arrange things so someone can sit there with you or they will come get you from down the hall as soon as they call you so you don't have to wait. Since he physically abused you, maybe the judge or mediator will take this into account that you are physically afraid of him

[ZeddsDed]

The court date went well. It was hard to see him and he tried to pressure me during the wait for the court room. The duty counsellor picked up on this and moved me to a private room to wait which helped me tons.

He applied for supervised visits but I didn't agree with anything yesterday and it will be months before the application goes through so I have some time to settle and think.

 

Afterwards he waited for me in the hallways as he was complaining he couldn't get home and needed money or a ride. The court workers spoke to him multiple times but he wouldn't listen so ended up having to be escorted out..

 

I'm feeling proud for being strong throughout the ordeal but it's hard to let go of the guilty feelings I get every time I see him

[Seraphim]

Good for you!!! You did great.

 

Plus he showed the court exactly who and what he is.

 

You feeling guilty and sympathy for him shows that you’re a normal person . And I guarantee he garners no such feelings for you or your children . So never be fooled by him , ever again.

[abitbroken]

That's excellent! You are staying strong and thinking about your kids.

 

He applied for supervised visits but I didn't agree with anything yesterday and it will be months before the application goes through so I have some time to settle and think.

 

 

Did you get to put your two cents in about it? Is the protective order still in place?

[ZeddsDed]

That's excellent! You are staying strong and thinking about your kids.

 

 

 

Did you get to put your two cents in about it? Is the protective order still in place?

I did I asked for it to be confirmed and extended and explained the main reasons why. It was granted and extended to one year from yesterday!

 

I do feel happy about it. I feel happy the kids can continue to strive in a happy environment. I have also noticed that I am so much less stressed and overwhelmed with my children. One of my main worries was that I would struggle to do everything alone.. but I see now he really didn't help at all.

[Jibralta]

Glad to hear that the duty counselor and court workers intervened on your behalf. It was brazen of him to ask you for money--shows he is still confident in his power over you, despite current circumstances. Stay strong and ignore the guilt. You are doing the right thing. Glad you are starting to see that he's been more of a dead weight than a help. Continue on in that direction.