Thoughts, Rants, and Musings

[Seraphim]

I don’t hate them , I just don’t think they are the poor put down people think they are. 

[Jibralta]

10 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

I don’t hate them

That's good.

[maritalbliss86]

45 minutes ago, Jibralta said:

So, I won't form an opinion about this situation for many years, after all of the hoopla has died down, and the truth filters out through all of the cheap thrills slag.

And I sympathize with Meghan and Harry. As a result of this media frenzy, people think it is ok to pick them apart and hate them and insult them. I don't think it's ever justifiable to fling hatred upon other people. I can't stand it and I won't be part of it.

Yes... I want to see how it all plays out 10, 15, or 20 years from now.  Very interested in a way, but then distracted with life enough that I forget about them and the drama or what the media has really said. 

[Seraphim]

My issue is more that they collect tax payers money from a country they are not in and don’t want to be a part of and their son doesn’t get to know his cousins or grandparents or great grandparents. 

[Jibralta]

4 hours ago, LootieTootie said:

Don't second guess your pet's judge of character.

Animals are funny. They have manners, just like people. I've noticed that some dogs, especially small yappy ones, really just want to be acknowledged--not petted and fawned over, mind you, but acknowledged.

I first noticed it when I visited my college room mate at her mother's house. They had a dog that barked its head off when I arrived, and who seemed mistrustful of me for the whole visit.

The next time I came over, I knelt down and let the dog sniff me at eye level. I don't know what made me do that, but it worked. The dog was totally my friend after that.

I've always done it since, and I've always gotten good results.

I used to babysit animals for people when they were away from home for long periods of time. I inadvertently put my little method to the test with a new potential client that I'd been recommended to. They had two west highland terriers, a male and a female.

The male dog was very social, came right up and greeted me when I arrived. The female dog was more reticent. She looked friendly and curious, but just sort of hung back and barked.

So, I squatted down and waited for her to come to me and she did. After she was done sniffing me, I gave her a pat on the head and stood back up. She didn't bark anymore; we'd been introduced.

I saw a gleam in the owner's eye at that exchange, but I didn't realize the significance of it (or that it had won me the job!) until the second time that I was babysitting the dogs.

My friend stopped by for a visit. The male dog went right up to him and gave him a friendly greeting. The female hung back and barked.

But instead of waiting for her to come to him, my friend strode over to her and attempted to pet her. The dog growled and backed away. My friend stupidly got offended by that and tried the old "I'm the boss" routine on her. Like, I will pet you because I am human and I am the boss. Basically tried to forcibly pet her.

Well, his bravado just pissed the dog off and she growled again and nipped at him. 

Then he complained to me that the dog was a jerk, and I was like, "She's not a jerk, you shouldn't be overwhelming her like that!" And then I recalled the (minimal) extra effort I put into meeting this dog, and the gleam in the owner's eye. I realized that other people must have made the same mistake as my friend made with this dog, and that I had passed a test with the owner without even knowing.

Dogs have personality quirks, just like people. So do horses. And don't even get me started about cats...

[SherrySher]

8 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Without being there, I have no real way of knowing what is actually going on. All I know for sure is that the main stream media is more interested in sensationalism

Very true. I agree with you on that, %100.

For the most part, I try not to buy into things like that either.

I guess it only seemed more plausible (about Meghan being the one causing the trouble), when different things arose from her past and people she knew, saying she was difficult to deal with.

They can't all be wrong?

Either way, I do feel like most of it is fluff. And I pay about %1 percent attention to it. I don't watch tv and as for news, I mainly skim my local newspaper, and even then, it's been more rare lately being as there is more anxiety provoking topics in it than anything else.

Really well written though, Jibralta. I really respect your view on things.

[Batya33]

Hi - I got the Callanetics book for back issues -looks great so far and worth it $8 or so used!

[Jibralta]

We watched The Shawshank Redemption on New Year's Eve. What an awesome movie. 

Yesterday, we watched You've Got Mail. It was a trip down memory lane, to say the least. Technology isn't the only thing that's changed in the past 20-odd years. Culture and perception has changed. My boyfriend was like, "But their cheating on their significant others!" referring to the way that Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan were secretly messaging each other. He wasn't wrong, but I don't think that was the perception when the movie came out. It was viewed as more innocent than it is now. 

We also watched La La Land. I didn't really like it. I like Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone, but this movie didn't come together for me. Something about it made it feel disjointed. I'm not a big fan of musicals, but that's not why I didn't like it, either. I can buy into a musical if it's convincing. But this wasn't. I also thought their big argument in the middle of the movie was stupid and trivial. Little kids could have overcome it with simple communication. I did like the mash-up at the end, however. Too bad the other elements felt so lopsided.

[Jibralta]

Yesterday, I realized that I am really disgusted/angry with my boss for the way he reacted to something that happened about a month ago. I've been mostly suppressing it ever since. But yesterday, he was on our zoom kick-off meeting, and I felt my whole face curling up into a sneer when I saw him.

It was easier to deny when I felt a little bit resentment every day. But I just had a nice 10-day vacation, where I didn't think about work at all. So, the burst of resentment came as a bit of a shock to me. I had to admit that I've been nursing feelings of dislike for the man.

I'm not sure if they're completely justified. Half of me thinks, They're just scatterbrained [Simon and Kasey]. They're overwhelmed with trying to grow their company. Three years ago, they only had three fulltime employees. Then it increased to five. Just over this last year or so, that number jumped to more like fifteen. So yeah... growing pains.

But another part of my is weary of the excuses that I make for people. Where I once would have relied on courtesy, I find myself impatiently plowing through people, unwilling to wait my turn--because if I wait, it never comes. I'm either invisible, or some *** tries to steal it from me. I just feel much more aggressive and it's not entirely comfortable. 

[Batya33]

Is there any way talking with him would make sense/help? I can relate to what you're feeling -had a similar -non-work -situation a few weeks ago seeing a formerly close friend on a zoom reunion -my intense reaction surprised me and still does.

[maritalbliss86]

2 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Where I once would have relied on courtesy, I find myself impatiently plowing through people, unwilling to wait my turn--because if I wait, it never comes. I'm either invisible, or some *** tries to steal it from me. I just feel much more aggressive and it's not entirely comfortable. 

I found the workplace, at least where I was, seriously cut-throat for women!  It was ridiculous!

There were two older women I found who were kind, and mentored me into some success, but some of the ones around my age, and some of the men, were just horrible to work with.  And this was a really professional place.  You'd think professional behavior would be the norm and encouraged, but it seems like it's rare to find a workplace where everything goes smoothly and communication is direct and easy.  I haven't had much time exploring that, but even just seeing my husband's work, and how he manages different attitudes and craziness, I've come to that conclusion from watching his work environment for over a decade also.  

I've become friends with a few of the women he loves working with, many of them are awesome and all of ones we're friends with are hard workers (as per what he sees and knows). 

But one time we had another person over, and they wanted to talk badly about one of the women coworkers... without merit really, they were just offended she had stood up for something (at work and pertaining to work) and been firm about it.  If that had been a man, he probably would have been more respected I think, but it earned her a reputation with at least this one person, as being b#tchy, even though we both KNOW she's not like that normally (and he's worked with her a lot).  

So I can see how the workplace would be hard overtime to not get more resentful toward things like that.  

[Jibralta]

22 hours ago, Batya33 said:

Is there any way talking with him would make sense/help?

Not sure yet.... I'm still getting to know him. I get the sense that he is an emotional guy. Well-meaning perhaps, but reactive. Kind of like my mom lol. 

I don't know if I can explain this exactly, but someone like him (or my mom) assumes that ALL other people (me!) are as sensitive and worried as they are about certain things. And it isn't the case at all.

Simon seems to interpret any questions or comments that I have as panic or pushback. But I'm not panicking or pushing back. I'm just gathering information--or informing him of potential problems.

I find that he always seems to be poised to argue against some imaginary resistance from me. It's very disconcerting, and causes all sorts of.... interference. It's like he's living in a dreamland where he is always under fire.

I don't think he's crazy or anything. But I'm really not sure how to get through to him. I'm afraid it may require a little hand-holding, and I am not good at that. In fact, growing up with my mom, I deliberately resisted developing that skill. But maybe it's time for me to think about it differently. 

[Jibralta]

My boyfriend requires less sleep than I do. He tends to come to bed later, and get up earlier.

A couple years ago I went through this phase where, on weekend mornings, I would wake up and text him to come in the bedroom. The text usually said something like, "Snuggle me."

The door would burst open, he would get into bed and cuddle up, and then we would drift off into a delightful snooze for about 30 minutes or so.

One morning, I texted, "Snuggle me," and nothing happened. I waited for a few minutes. Then I looked at my phone.

To my horror, I saw that I had texted, "Snuggle me" to my friend Jack. My married friend Jack!

I was MORTIFIED. I mean, how embarrassing to text something so silly and private to a friend like that. I rushed to text Jack, "OMG!!! That was meant for Arnold. So sorry!!!!"

Without skipping a beat, Jack replied, "Your loss."

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Awesome reply. Still cracks me up to this day. 😂

[Jibralta]

I got a text last night from my former coworker, which I just read a couple minutes ago. Four people from my old job got COVID and were laid off, including the girl who texted me!!

That makes nine people since April. 

It seems like it wouldn't be legal to lay someone off when they are sick.

[Jibralta]

14 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

Her influences of childhood and religion  though kept her trying to reunite with him over the decades and it never worked. 

I haven't heard a word back since I sent that letter to my bio-grandmother. I know that she is very religious. I wonder if that's why she hasn't responded. Maybe she thinks I'm ungodly. 

Well, there's a lot I can say to that. But no use getting into an argument with myself. 😂

[Batya33]

On 1/8/2021 at 7:05 AM, Jibralta said:

My boyfriend requires less sleep than I do. He tends to come to bed later, and get up earlier.

A couple years ago I went through this phase where, on weekend mornings, I would wake up and text him to come in the bedroom. The text usually said something like, "Snuggle me."

The door would burst open, he would get into bed and cuddle up, and then we would drift off into a delightful snooze for about 30 minutes or so.

One morning, I texted, "Snuggle me," and nothing happened. I waited for a few minutes. Then I looked at my phone.

To my horror, I saw that I had texted, "Snuggle me" to my friend Jack. My married friend Jack!

I was MORTIFIED. I mean, how embarrassing to text something so silly and private to a friend like that. I rushed to text Jack, "OMG!!! That was meant for Arnold. So sorry!!!!"

Without skipping a beat, Jack replied, "Your loss."

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Awesome reply. Still cracks me up to this day. 😂

Oh wow.  that is precious and classic.  It is an awesome reply because well he was right!!  It's so good that I stopped myself from thinking -oh I must have a similar misfire story to share but..... nothing to approach this.  Thank you.

[Jibralta]

2 hours ago, Batya33 said:

It is an awesome reply because well he was right!! 

His timing has always been good. Sometimes I don't think he's aware of how funny he is.

When we were in graduate school, a couple of our classmates (who had recently immigrated from other continents) thought he was always angry. They were not accustomed to a super dry, sarcastic sense of humor like his. But as they got to know him, they realized he is actually one of the nicest guys.

[Jibralta]

Something weird happened with my YouTube homepage about a week ago. Suddenly, all of the default videos that showed up were from 2017. It was like my privacy settings finally kicked in or something. You know, the settings where you tell them not to track your usage (and thus not personalize your content)? Well, despite my selection, they were tracking my usage and personalizing my content.... and I kind of liked it. Now I have to search for my Graham Norton fixes lol. 

My entire viewing history was deleted back to 2016, and my subscriptions disappeared (there weren't many). But the really depressing side effect of the whole change is that my playlists disappeared. 

I don't use YouTube a whole lot. I mainly use it for recipes, or to watch something while we eat. But I did rely on it to bookmark new music that I liked, and to create a couple of playlists. Now that I've been using Spotify, I wanted to revisit those playlists and possibly re-create them on Spotify. 

I was smart enough to copy the song names from the "Favorites" list, which is where I bookmarked the new music. I actually did that three times! But I never copied the names of the songs from the other playlists. Now I can hear the music in my head, but I don't know the names of the songs. I hate that.

Boo. 👎

 

[Seraphim]

29 minutes ago, Jibralta said:

Something weird happened with my YouTube homepage about a week ago. Suddenly, all of the default videos that showed up were from 2017. It was like my privacy settings finally kicked in or something. You know, the settings where you tell them not to track your usage (and thus not personalize your content)? Well, despite my selection, they were tracking my usage and personalizing my content.... and I kind of liked it. Now I have to search for my Graham Norton fixes lol. 

My entire viewing history was deleted back to 2016, and my subscriptions disappeared (there weren't many). But the really depressing side effect of the whole change is that my playlists disappeared. 

I don't use YouTube a whole lot. I mainly use it for recipes, or to watch something while we eat. But I did rely on it to bookmark new music that I liked, and to create a couple of playlists. Now that I've been using Spotify, I wanted to revisit those playlists and possibly re-create them on Spotify. 

I was smart enough to copy the song names from the "Favorites" list, which is where I bookmarked the new music. I actually did that three times! But I never copied the names of the songs from the other playlists. Now I can hear the music in my head, but I don't know the names of the songs. I hate that.

Boo. 👎

 

Oh my God I would die if that happened I have hundreds of subscriptions. 

[Jibralta]

I think I had four subscriptions, total. I'll be ok 😂😂

I may even be able to remember what they are   😂😂  😂😂

[Jibralta]

2 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Now I can hear the music in my head, but I don't know the names of the songs.

Ha! I remembered one:

 

[luminousone]

On 1/8/2021 at 7:05 AM, Jibralta said:

I got a text last night from my former coworker, which I just read a couple minutes ago. Four people from my old job got COVID and were laid off, including the girl who texted me!!

That makes nine people since April. 

It seems like it wouldn't be legal to lay someone off when they are sick.

Oh my goodness! Yes, you would think it is illegal. Thank goodness you are no longer there.

They have no souls...

[Jibralta]

I do think it is illegal. But I don't know if the affected employees will do anything about it.

Paula (my former coworker) forwarded me an email that Mark (one of the owners) sent out on Tuesday, which all but accuses these four employees of getting covid through their own irresponsibility. Here are some excerpts (I deleted only a couple of sentences that contained generic info/facts):

Quote

During the Christmas holiday weekend about 10% of our staff were in direct contact with someone with COVID-19..... The entire country is seeing increased cases due to the new strand of the virus and the fact that people traveled and stepped outside of their cohorts during the holidays. Where I appreciate many of you wanted to see your family and friends for the holiday it was dangers and irresponsible to do so.... I cannot control what you do outside the office but I most urge you all to not introduce new people into your immediate sphere of contact and do everything you can to maintain social distancing. We are fighting every day to maintain our current level of sales and production. It is getting harder and harder to do this as the economy continues to weaken. The need to quarantine key staff members does not make it any easier. 

Two days later, he laid off all four employees with covid. 

Of course, Mark has no way of knowing what these four employees actually did over the holiday. And it's none of his business, anyway. Furthermore, getting covid does not mean that the infected person was irresponsible. Many people get covid despite following CDC guidelines. 

To add insult to injury, all four of these employees were working from home when they were laid off. They didn't come into the office because they had symptoms. Paula had no idea that three other people had covid until Mark sent out his email.

Mark's email and his actions remind me of something that Josef Stalin would do in order to increase overall anxiety, and therefore subservience. 

Poor Paula was in the hospital with her son when she got the call from Mark. Her whole family had tested positive for covid. She thought he was calling to ask about her health, but instead he said something like, "I am sure you're going through a tough time with your family right now. And I have more bad news for you: You're laid off."

Yes, I am sooo very grateful to be gone from there!

[Jibralta]

Another thing: Mark actually sent out an email to his whole company in September, admonishing people who opted to work from home. He said, "You cannot just wake up and say I am going to work from home today, regardless of who you are in the corporate hierarchy. We need to know in advance, and it needs to be approved. We are very flexible but it has to be respectful. Anyone who does in the future will not be paid for the day." 

It puts people in an impossible situation. What if they have possible symptoms, but are ok to work? Do they have to take a whole sick day until their symptoms clear or they get a covid test? It's not really fair to force people to eat through their sick days like that. 

To put this into perspective, my current employer has encouraged everyone to work from home until further notice. We are in the exact same industry, and we can somehow make it work. The civil guy at my job contracted covid over the holiday. His whole family has it. Our employers didn't lay him off. They didn't send an ominous email to the office about people being irresponsible. He works from home when he feels up to it and rests when he doesn't. 

I just texted a friend in the same industry and his entire company is working from home. I told him what happened at my last employer and his response was, "What??? That's insane." 

It is definitely insane. I really hope they don't get away with it. 

[maritalbliss86]

31 minutes ago, Jibralta said:

It is definitely insane. I really hope they don't get away with it. 

I think when people act like that, eventually it catches up with them.  Hopefully it does in this case.  Hopefully at least one of those employees goes after the company (it'd be easier if they all banded together to do it though).

But the company may get away with it, because they're going to come out strong that the employees were irresponsible (even if not true!).  People have been fired for much less, and society seems to take the COVID thing very seriously and that encourages harsh punishments for people who even seem to be acting irresponsibly.  

The company could make the case that if they don't make an example of these people, that more employees will act irresponsibly, affecting their success as a company.