jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 Aw folks what do I do!!!! I caved in and bloody text her, I just felt that If she never knew I still loved her and that i wasnt moving on she would just forget about me. I just told her that I respect she wants space and im willing to give her it whilst I work on myself. I just WISH she would say "give me space and time and we'll see how things go" but everything she is saying is so confusing!!!!! I love her and I want to be with her forever, I hate all this "i cant predict the future, i love you" its just confusing me so much. I really don't know what else to do anymore, I just want things to be normal again, im a lost cause without her, she makes my world spin. Link to comment
Atlantis Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 It is okay. Afterall it has only been two days so everything is very fresh. Don't contact her anymore though. It really doesnt work. Try to work on yourself. Your life cant be perfect, she canf be the only thing missing. Find what else should be added to your life to make it better, and focus on that. Go on no contact indefinitely. Don't contact her unless she contacts you. Dont worry, if she wants she will contact you. If she doesnt want you, no matter how many times you remind her of yourself and your love or try to show her that you are moving on or make her jealous, it wont work Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Share Posted April 20, 2017 It is okay. Afterall it has only been two days so everything is very fresh. Don't contact her anymore though. It really doesnt work. Try to work on yourself. Your life cant be perfect, she canf be the only thing missing. Find what else should be added to your life to make it better, and focus on that. Go on no contact indefinitely. Don't contact her unless she contacts you. Dont worry, if she wants she will contact you. If she doesnt want you, no matter how many times you remind her of yourself and your love or try to show her that you are moving on or make her jealous, it wont work We broke up last tuesday though, and its been going in circles. I just cant accept it, and she isnt exactly making it easy for me to accept either. Everything she is saying is confusing me!!! Ugh I don't want to feel like this any lomger, im SICK of it. Link to comment
Keyman Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 Dude, You're gonna be alright. Just get back on that wagon and start again. The first days are the hardest. Like I said yesterday, it's okay to fall off the wagon, but that is what we are here for, to help you back up there. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 There's nothing you can do .. but what you shouldn't do is worry about it because in the grand scheme of things it really isn't a big deal. Just pick yourself up and start again. If she knew you loved her two days ago then she still knows it now. You don't need to remind her .. for whatever reason you felt it was necessary. She wants space, so give her space. Try not to hang on to anything she has said that you find confusing. A lot of what people say are said in order to hurt you in the least way possible but it just serves to offer false hope. All you need to know is that she has ended things and that you have to help yourself to look forwards. That gets easier with time. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Share Posted April 20, 2017 She replied with this. "listen I know you love me but I genuinly cant predict the future, righht now as it stands I cant see us getting back together and I dont think its fair you wait around. I have kept all of the pictures and things you gave me because its not llike you've cheated, I dont hate you or anything it just wasnt working. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Share Posted April 20, 2017 Dude, You're gonna be alright. Just get back on that wagon and start again. The first days are the hardest. Like I said yesterday, it's okay to fall off the wagon, but that is what we are here for, to help you back up there. aw man its crap! Im just going to be silent now, but I cant let go of her, I'll wait for that text from her, if i dont get it after a month then ill truly know. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Share Posted April 20, 2017 There's nothing you can do .. but what you shouldn't do is worry about it because in the grand scheme of things it really isn't a big deal. Just pick yourself up and start again. If she knew you loved her two days ago then she still knows it now. You don't need to remind her .. for whatever reason you felt it was necessary. She wants space, so give her space. Try not to hang on to anything she has said that you find confusing. A lot of what people say are said in order to hurt you in the least way possible but it just serves to offer false hope. All you need to know is that she has ended things and that you have to help yourself to look forwards. That gets easier with time. yeah I know i gotta leave her alone. She just confuses me alot. Im going to leave it now, if she texts me asking to try again ofcourse I will, if she doesnt, ill well and truly know that all of her chat about "cant see it right now" or "predicting the future" was just rubbish. Link to comment
j.man Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 Well that didn't last very long. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Share Posted April 20, 2017 Well that didn't last very long. tell me about it. Im her biggest fan just dont want to lose her for good. Really now though, this time Im doing it, she knows im not doing it to move on she knows im giving her space so we'll see how things pan out Link to comment
Keyman Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 You can do it, Bruv, keep your head up and move on. Link to comment
Loralora Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 She replied with this. "listen I know you love me but I genuinly cant predict the future, righht now as it stands I cant see us getting back together and I dont think its fair you wait around. I have kept all of the pictures and things you gave me because its not llike you've cheated, I dont hate you or anything it just wasnt working. Based on her way of replying I get this: She isn't interested in being with you at all. The reason she is saying that she can't predict the future is because she either wants to keep you as an option (the last option) for the future if she can't find anyone else that she thinks is better for her and at the same time look for other guys while you wait, OR she's just trying to let you go easily since she did say that she can't see you get back together. She doesn't seem at all interested to keep this going and is just trying to be nice and not hurt your feelings. Sorry for being so harsh but her words don't really seem confusing to me they seem pretty clear. She doesn't even sound like she loves you or has any regrets.. I think you are trying to desperately find a hidden message...hope...though there isn't one... I'd start moving on...I don't think she will ever come back... Plus she clearly stated that it wasn't a fast irrational decision or and un thought through one. She seems to have made up her mind and is clearly saying that it wasn't working. Seems like you guys clearly had a lot of problems for a long time now and she seems done. Maybe it isn't something you did wrong repeatedly (if that was the reason then use this time to work on your self so you don't repeat the same thing to future partners) Maybe you and her simply weren't compatible for each other and no matter how hard you tried or how many times you got back together it wouldn't have worked. I know how hard it must be...but you'll make it. Been there done that...and I survived and I am happier than I ever was !! Link to comment
Loralora Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 And I just read the thread of why you broke up. Seems like she has been thinking of breaking up for a long time now...as I said she's tired of this relationship...what happend there was just the feather that broke the camels back...it was a bomb waiting to explode.. I know how hard it is to accept it and move on...but you got no other choice.. We never know how strong we are untill being strong is the only option we have left... Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Share Posted April 20, 2017 And I just read the thread of why you broke up. Seems like she has been thinking of breaking up for a long time now...as I said she's tired of this relationship...what happend there was just the feather that broke the camels back...it was a bomb waiting to explode.. I know how hard it is to accept it and move on...but you got no other choice.. We never know how strong we are untill being strong is the only option we have left... Honestly i cant accept that. She was in tears telling me she loved me!!! Ive told her to blatantly say she doesnt Ever want it again so its not like its to not hurt me, it's already hurt me! She also does not have any plans to get with other males, she was explicit. She said she doesn't want anyone else but me, she says she just thinks it wasnt working at that monent in time. How do you explain that! I cant give up on her, I really can't. I gotta stick around and give her space and hope that she comes back 😔 Link to comment
Loralora Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 Honestly i cant accept that. She was in tears telling me she loved me!!! Ive told her to blatantly say she doesnt Ever want it again so its not like its to not hurt me, it's already hurt me! She also does not have any plans to get with other males, she was explicit. She said she doesn't want anyone else but me, she says she just thinks it wasnt working at that monent in time. How do you explain that! I cant give up on her, I really can't. I gotta stick around and give her space and hope that she comes back 😔 If what you're saying is true...how come in this text she sent you she wrote " I know you love me" , she didn't write "I love you or I love you too"... I think she's telling you she has no plans on getting with other guys because she knows you can't accept that. She's trying to break it up in a soft way; Maybe she isn't planning on seeing other guys for awhile, I might be wrong on that...but she for sure isn't planning on continuing to see you. Based on this text she sent you...it doesn't seem like she wants no one else but you. It seems like she for sure doesn't want you and maybe no one else for some time... Also you guys already took "breaks"; I think she thinks that "taking breaks" chapter is over .. I think she's just saying the "for right now" thing so you won't be as hurt for now... Hope I'm wrong... But if what you're saying is true...then the only minimal tinny tiny hope you might have is if you truly do give her space and she sees that you have changed based on your actions not words. If she asked for space then give it to her don't keep texting her. If this is a "test" for you then you really have to give her space. Texting her and contacting her frequently will only push her father away... Find a way to chill ..keep your self busy with friends and family...or take a course of some sort or class or some out door activity..then if she decides that she wants to come back (allthough I highly doubt it) then great, if not then still great, you'll be able to handle her not coming back after some time of NO contact much better...in the mean time you live, learn and not repeat.. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 Smothering her even more will just keep pushing her away. She's ended it. It's not confusing. She's being diplomatic in order not to negotiate/argue be made to feel guilty, etc. and get you off her back. However she should really block you. Give her the space she needs and pull way back and reflect on your need to control and smother her. She's a grown 20 y/o woman and doesn't want someone breathing down her neck. She wants to be trusted, not answer to you as if you're her dad and she's a child. You need to rethink your controlling and possessive nature and get a grip on that. Do not contact her or buzz around...it will only prove her point that she was right to break free. Link to comment
Loralora Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 I agree with Wiseman...maybe she wants to see if you can finally trust her and respect her by listening to what she has to say and actually doing it. Though if her going out to clubs or her lifestyle bothers you, or you know you will not be able to trust her then maybe you two are just not compatible and no amout of taking breaks or arguing will change that... Anyway I hope you read and put into consideration our above written words... Good luck...and chill ✌ Link to comment
Tanzi Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 yeah I know i gotta leave her alone. She just confuses me alot. Im going to leave it now, if she texts me asking to try again ofcourse I will, if she doesnt, ill well and truly know that all of her chat about "cant see it right now" or "predicting the future" was just rubbish. Well she's given you pretty straightforward and honest answers there. It is only you reading into her words that is making it confusing. If you take what she says at face value there's no reason to read into anything she has said. It's worth bearing in mind that when faced with a barrage of questions (which we all throw out there after a break up), it's hard to know what satisfactory answers to give that you think will help yet not hurt too much or give too much false hope at the same time, especially when you don't really know the answers yourself. Sometimes people are backed into corners and don't know what to say for the best. Link to comment
RebeccaLynn Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 you should take things one day at a time. do your best to move on. I'm sorry your hurting, I'm suffering with a broken heart right now as well, so I understand how it feels to want and need someone and it's just not going to happen. I'm truly sorry. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 We broke up last tuesday though, and its been going in circles. I just cant accept it, and she isnt exactly making it easy for me to accept either. Everything she is saying is confusing me!!! Ugh I don't want to feel like this any lomger, im SICK of it. That's kind of the point of NC. She can't confuse you if you're not talking to her. The longer you go NC, the less sick of it you will feel. Patience. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 She replied with this. "listen I know you love me but I genuinly cant predict the future, righht now as it stands I cant see us getting back together and I dont think its fair you wait around. I have kept all of the pictures and things you gave me because its not llike you've cheated, I dont hate you or anything it just wasnt working. How is this confusing? She said she can't see you getting back together. It's a tough break. But it is a break. It's a permanent one. Be kind to yourself and go NC and stay NC. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 21, 2017 Author Share Posted April 21, 2017 If what you're saying is true...how come in this text she sent you she wrote " I know you love me" , she didn't write "I love you or I love you too"... I think she's telling you she has no plans on getting with other guys because she knows you can't accept that. She's trying to break it up in a soft way; Maybe she isn't planning on seeing other guys for awhile, I might be wrong on that...but she for sure isn't planning on continuing to see you. Based on this text she sent you...it doesn't seem like she wants no one else but you. It seems like she for sure doesn't want you and maybe no one else for some time... Also you guys already took "breaks"; I think she thinks that "taking breaks" chapter is over .. I think she's just saying the "for right now" thing so you won't be as hurt for now... Hope I'm wrong... But if what you're saying is true...then the only minimal tinny tiny hope you might have is if you truly do give her space and she sees that you have changed based on your actions not words. If she asked for space then give it to her don't keep texting her. If this is a "test" for you then you really have to give her space. Texting her and contacting her frequently will only push her father away... Find a way to chill ..keep your self busy with friends and family...or take a course of some sort or class or some out door activity..then if she decides that she wants to come back (allthough I highly doubt it) then great, if not then still great, you'll be able to handle her not coming back after some time of NO contact much better...in the mean time you live, learn and not repeat.. Well lastnight she said to me "i love you, so much. But right now im drained and I dont know what else to say" the last text I said to her lastnight was how much I love her, how much im willing to do to make things right, I said don't reply right now take a day, a week or however long to think about it all. She normally would reply right away with something but she hasnt, shes either ignoring me (not like her and she hasnt blocked my number) or she is actually thinking... Link to comment
Loralora Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 Well lastnight she said to me "i love you, so much. But right now im drained and I dont know what else to say" the last text I said to her lastnight was how much I love her, how much im willing to do to make things right, I said don't reply right now take a day, a week or however long to think about it all. She normally would reply right away with something but she hasnt, shes either ignoring me (not like her and she hasnt blocked my number) or she is actually thinking... It's good that she said she loves you. But DO NOT CONTACT her again unless she contacts you first. It's really important that you don't contact her first again! REALLY important.. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 21, 2017 Author Share Posted April 21, 2017 It's good that she said she loves you. But DO NOT CONTACT her again unless she contacts you first. It's really important that you don't contact her first again! REALLY important.. really hope things work out love her so much, don't want anyone else but her. Will keep you updated. Link to comment
jonnyboy12 Posted April 21, 2017 Author Share Posted April 21, 2017 really hope things work out love her so much, don't want anyone else but her. Will keep you updated. So she replies to my text with the same, "im drained, and done" i said okay, understood, just tell me we won't ever be together again? She says "I've said what I have to say im not answering anymore" LOL she can't answer a simple question. Ive not replied. Don't think I will. Maybe she reallly does just need space, after all ive not left her alone since the breakup. Its absolutely crap but has to happen now. NO CONTACT STARTS NOW Link to comment
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