Boyfriend blocked me on Facebook

[sailormoonk]

We both went to Vietnam to visit our families but they are located 4 hours from each other. He told me he went travelling with his dad to a resort and I saw his pictures on Facebook. there's only pictures of his selfies and scenery and not his dad's. In one picture, I found a a girl's bag on the coffee table in the hotel room. I asked him about it and he said it belonged to his half-sister but he never mentioned that she also traveled with them before. I asked why he didn't mention her before and he said that he doesn't like her. Those words are not enough to make me believe him. However, when we got back, we are still seeing each other and he said briefly he would find a way to prove it to me. After 2 weeks he has not mentioned about it, I asked him again if he found something to prove to me, he begins to get upset. He just failed a written test to get to the police recruit position so it's partially my fault since I didn't wait until he feels better about the test. I have been helping him to apply for them by filling out paperwork and submitted application online. Anyway, he was upset and started to say things like I only worry about the past, not the present. he said he was stupid to think that I would believe his words without asking for evidence and that I was pushing him to the pit. I really didn't ask him a lot, just a follow up because I don't know when he would be able to find something to prove it to me. Then he said he needs sometimes alone and I agreed. Then he blocked me on facebook and sent me a text saying that he loved me and he knew I loved him and gave him sometime. I just think blocking me on facebook is too much. I am not a person that text someone non-stop. I didn't even say anything after the conversation. Would you please advise what I should do in this situation?

[leseine7]

Ohhhhhh girl, run. Just run.

 

There is no good news for you here. In my opinion from reading your post, he was almost definitely with another girl and lied. Especially the comment about 'he was stupid to think you would believe his words without asking for evidence.' - This is a classic maneuver to make you STOP looking for evidence because there is something to hide. As well as blocking you on Facebook, there is no reason to do that (although he will give you some) - there are probably pictures being posted that he doesn't want you to see. It's easy for a girl he went on a trip with or saw while on a trip to comment somewhere about it and give him away. Blocking you covers his tracks.

 

My personal experience with this was devastating. I dated a guy for about two years who was a psychopath and amazing liar - he got me to believe things I now feel nauseated thinking about. He went on a trip (to vietnam, oddly, and myanmar) around his birthday in December a couple of years ago while we were still together. He told me prior to the trip that he was traveling with two friends of his who were dating and that he would be a 'third wheel'. He had refused my facebook request, even though we had been seriously together for about 6 months at that point and he'd just met my family and said he loved me and everything. He told me it was because he had a 'psycho ex' who would try to ruin what we had.

 

One day while he was on the trip, I had a weird feeling and checked his facebook account to a) see if he had approved my friend request and b) see if he had posted any pics of the trip. He'd promised me he would try to keep in touch but I didn't hear from him and we had plans to see one another when he returned. Also, gut feeling. He had posted a pic publicly of himself, and a girl commented whom he'd always insisted was just a friend and nothing special - and her comment indicated to me that she was with him, in the hot air balloon the pic was of, on his birthday, as the photographer. My stomach dropped because I knew then that he was with her instead of his two friends. He came home and took me out to dinner and gave me pants he bought for me and told me how he wished I was there the whole time. When I confronted him about what I saw and asked who he was really with, he STILL lied about it, and hen eventually caved and told me but spun it angrily exactly the way your SO is.

 

In the end I found out she was his girlfriend. And there were other girls he screwed around with too. It's way too easy for guys like this to have multiple lives, and once you have a 'feeling' about it and there are inconsistencies to the stories, it is so important to trust your gut and leave. I gave him WAY too much of my time and energy. Please don't put yourself through the same pain.

[SherrySher]

I agree with Leseine. There are too many things in what you've just described for one not to think that he has been doing things he shouldn't be.

It's the one thing I have learnt as well that if something look's a bit off, it's worth investigating. If your intuition is telling you something is not right, listen to it.

[leseine7]

I've learned to NEVER ignore big inconsistencies. I think every single time they've occurred in my past with someone, there was something truly shady happening.

[missmarple]

I agree with the other posters. Plus, if anyone decided to block me on f/b, that would be it for me. I'd be gone in a heartbeat.

[Creacion]

So, he's seeing other women and you're no longer a friend on FB... sounds like it's over and he won't be honest and still isn't being honest. Time to let go and move on with dignity.

[DancingFool]

What you should do is forget he exists and if he ever has the audacity to contact you again and try to crawl back to you, send him packing.

 

Basically, he was with someone else, got caught, hoped you'd forget about it and let it go, you remembered, he got aggressive/defensive and then ran. The FB thing, he didn't block you so you can't contact him, he blocked you so you are not able to see more incriminating stuff on there.

[Wiseman2]

It sounds like does not want to prove anything for whatever reason and your distrust and interrogations proved to be too much. Maybe he was cheating, maybe not... but you are assuming he is?.. In any case your detective attitude was enough for him to solve his problem by blocking you on fb and breaking up. Block him and go no contact.

Then he blocked me on facebook and sent me a text saying that he loved me and he knew I loved him and gave him sometime.

[leseine7]

It sounds like does not want to prove anything for whatever reason and your distrust and interrogations proved to be too much. Maybe he was cheating, maybe not... but you are assuming he is?.. In any case your detective attitude was enough for him to solve his problem by blocking you on fb and breaking up. Block him and go no contact.

 

She hardly played detective. He changed his story multiple times and she grew understandably suspicious. That's the problem here. She didn't have to play detective to notice another girls' bag on his hotel room table and then be told a different story from what he previously told her. That would make pretty much ANYONE wonder what's really going on. (And rightfully).

[sailormoonk]

Thanks everyone. I have made a decision to break up with him. Just within 6 months and there has been so much shady things happened. I will be better off in the future without him. Although I feel sad and empty now. I will very through this. Thank you for everyone's support!

[Wiseman2]

Smart choice given the evasive ambiguous behaviors.

I have made a decision to break up with him. Just within 6 months and there has been so much shady things happened. I will be better off in the future without him.

[sailormoonk]

Hi everyone,

It's been a week since I sent a text to break up with him. He still blocked me on Facebook and didn't reply to my text. Should I ask him to confirm things or should I just forget about it?

[lucidious]

His no reply and block on fb speaks for itself. He doesn't care about you or the relationship. It's over and done with, he's gone. Let it go and move on.

[Wiseman2]

Now you're free of this and can move on.

 

This is your confirmation 6593976]didn't reply to my text.