Broke up with me because I am not Catholic

[uk27]

I am going to keep updating, in the hope that it helps people in some way. After the guy broke up with me, he broke no contact, called and said he wanted to talk- but didn't set a date for it. Kept texting me everyday like we had never broken up, until I put my foot down and said 'when do you want to talk? I cannot keep texting like this much longer'. Met with him yesterday- with my 5 pages of 'solutions and moving forward suggestions' highlighting things that would change in our relationship (with the break I realized our relationship wasn't exactly perfect) and how we would manage the catholic/non-Catholic divide. He came over, and after talking about nothing for an hour and drinking wine I finally asked him what he wanted to talk about. He said 'nothing. I am here for you, to answer your questions and doubts you may have about the breakup'. I was very confused at this point and said 'is asking questions going to change the outcome' to which he said no. Then he argued that it was I that asked to talk (not true), and that he had not worked on processing his thoughts like he said he would.

He re-iterated his religions beliefs, and then said something extra- that he did not feel inspired to work things out with me and that realization has been very painful to him. Five minutes later, he was tossed out of my apartment.

A few things happened- the guy freaked when I went silent after the breakup and broke NC. He said he was surprised that I had no more questions to help me with closure. He got weak and missed me and therefore contacted me. Lied that he wanted to work things out, dragged it out as long as possible while texting and talking like no breakup had happened. I put my foot down, he shows up at my place, has nothing to say, to which I did the ever popular, 'why are you talking to me, why are you here, and what do you want'... to which he said 'I don't know'. I looked down at my 5 pages of 'solutions'. I was done.

Sad ending, but I hope this means better things for me in the future

[Seraphim]

The guy sounds like a serious idiot. So basically he wanted to use you to get over you. I'm glad you put the kibosh on that. You deserve better than that.

[Lonewing]

There are good men who go single because great women get stuck on ruts...

 

Seriously though, I do hope you're feeling better soon, as much as this hurt, and I hope that there's solace in the fact that the next time you're faced with this, you'll be far more equipped to act. This guy is a royal...gutterball...

 

Nothing but UP from here!

[chitown9]

Any guy who toys with a girl for seven months and then dumps her with a stupid excuse is NOT a nice guy.

 

He failed you. And yeah, definitely see that you don't try contacting him again, he deserves not a second more of your time or effort.

 

 

 

Sounds like the guy is a commitment phobe and you are lucky to be rid of him. chi

[uk27]

Thanks guys. Looking towards the UP, lonewing. Day 1 NC. (deep breath).

[Supernova1607309611]

I'm glad you found this out.. it will help you heal.

 

He sounds like he's kind of selfish/egocentric, i.e., it's all about him and he's not really thinking about anyone but himself or even whether how he is behaving is damaging to someone else. He just wants what he wants.

 

i suspect what he wanted was to drop that bomb that he couldn't marry you due to catholicism, then try to ease in the back door to pick up some FWB action once you'd 'accepted' that not marrying was for the best. And he'd use you for support and benefits until he did meet that nice catholic girl his mother will approve of.

 

So you can now know with extreme confidence that he is not the one for you. And knowing that, keep up the NC and heal. He's a dry well as far as you are concerned, nothing there for you, so time to put him behind you and go find someone better for yourself.

 

Best of luck.. you will be fine! the confrontation with him was painful, but very useful to your healing!