mindless14 Posted July 24, 2014 Share Posted July 24, 2014 My ex just told me that his girlfriend may possibly be taking her ex husband to court for child support. Her ex and her do not get along and he is very spiteful and absolutely hates the idea of my ex being anywhere near her or her kids. This is a problem because my ex and his girlfriend live together. They do not have a custody agreement but are involved with a lawyer that helped with their divorce. If she takes him to court and he tries to do anything to spite her, which we're worried he will, can my kids be brought into this? They stay at their dad's, which is the girlfriends house, with them and her kids 3 days a week. My ex and I have 50/50 custody but nothing legal. We work very well together. Im worried that he'll always bring up him living there, her having an affair, (they were not legally divorced when she started seeing my ex) or try to say my ex is unfit or something like that. Or bring up concerns about my kids living there. I have a 4 year old and a newborn. Can he say this is unstable or something? And if he dod, would it effect my kids at all? I've heard he could basically make it so that my ex couldn't live with her, leaving him no where to go and my kids no where to see their dad. Could this effect my kids at all? I know its just child support but he could get angry about that (hes already said he does not want to pay a dime) and then take her for custody or anything else. I dont really know the laws and have never been through court as my ex and I are so amicable. We're in new York if it helps. Link to comment
SpottiOtti Posted July 24, 2014 Share Posted July 24, 2014 I don't see how they could drag your ex or your kids into anything unless your ex has a criminal record or drinks a lot or does drugs or something like that. From what I understand, the only way the guy could avoid paying child support is to gain full custody of the children, and the only way he could do that is to prove that she is an unfit mother. Any chance of that happening? He could sling mud at her and complain about her choice of boyfriend, but unless he can prove that your ex is a danger to his children, I don't see how their case would affect them. Now, living in what sounds like a volatile and unstable situation for 50% of the time? That I'd be concerned about, if I were you. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted July 24, 2014 Share Posted July 24, 2014 These are all things you should be asking a lawyer. Link to comment
mindless14 Posted July 24, 2014 Author Share Posted July 24, 2014 Neither my ex or his gf at unfit. However her husband would try to lie to hurt her. The main thing he'd use is the affair. And I don't worry about my kids being there because her husband is not and my ex and her are great with my kids and hers. Her husband and her rarely communicate in person and never around the kids. Link to comment
ParisPaulette Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 You need to contact an attorney who specializes in family law about this matter. We can all give you advice until the cows come home, but it could still be wrong, because we don't know where you are or what the laws are regarding custody issues. Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 No judge is going to bring someone else's children into a court unless they witnessed something and then it would be taken with a grain of salt by the judge. Her ex sounds petty and full of threats that most if not all judges have seen before and see right through them. He is trying to bully her because he wants to hurt her since he is hurt. She should have finished her divorce and custody agreement BEFORE dating and surely BEFORE moving in with a new man. Now she has to live with those consequences. The children should always be left out of the grown ups business to protect them.... Lost Link to comment
Brotherhood67 Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 My ex and I have 50/50 custody but nothing legal. More precision about this, please ? Link to comment
CatsMeeoow Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 It's really rare that judge ever wants minors in the court room... and I'm referring to her children... and they sure as never would drag your children into it.... its an adult playing field period. Family courts have seen it all. This is not the first couple to sling mud onto each other. If their marriage is over she really has the right to see, live with anyone she wants to - your ex may be called in as a witness in the dissolution of her marriage if this guy pushes it but highly unlikely as NY is a no fault divorce state. Sometimes people put rules on the ex as to how they will behave post divorce... no dating... no sleep overs but those are truly hard to enforce and can only be put in place if both parties agree. Now, some states do mandate that children cannot be moved out of state post divorce so as to not make if difficult for the non-custodial parent to have an on going relationship with the child but beyond that courts are not into mandating behavior unless there is documented drug or alcohol use. This guy is just trying to threaten her. She needs to get her divorce finalized as soon as possible and hopefully she has an attorney and is getting that done. If I were you whether or not I get along with my ex I would want to make certain that my kids were not involved in the day to day issues of her drama. I would make sure your ex understood if he could not provide a drama free zone for them at him and his gf's house that the kids should spend time with him elsewhere. Good Luck Link to comment
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