Live-N-Learn Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I deactivated my account about 3 months ago....best thing I ever did! I have no urge whatsoever to log back on and and stab myself in the neck with a knife by seeing her profile. Link to comment
carrie8484 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I dont have him on my friends list anymore after he blocked me from seeing his wall a couple of weeks after the break up. Not looked up his page for at least 2.5 months. He has a twitter which I have never looked at but I hate the fact twitter accounts are public incase I ever get itchy fingers going off subject, when he came round to collect his things the other night he was wearing a tsihrt of my favourite band - a band he was never into when we were together but he knew I loved them. Weird or what...! Link to comment
symbiot Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Oh man he's playing with your head. He wants you to want him back. I don't ever see my ex or check her FB except that one night right after I moved and that was within the first 3 wks. Link to comment
beacon Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 In my case, the difficulty with blocking her is that we have about 100 mutual friends, so I just deactivated but I can't shut out my other friends on FB forever. At some point I have to move past this... Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 I know, I guess what torments me is that he's still single and that we broke up over something that didn't really even turn out right since they aren't together. Part of me just wants them to get together, or maybe not them, but just him to be with someone so I can stop wondering when he's gonna be with someone. I know it shouldn't matter but the fact that he's single leaves that door open for so many things to go through my mind. And when I don't check, I just think, "Hey maybe he's with someone now". I hate waiting for what I know is gonna come sooner or later. It's been 6 to 7 months, I think he should have found someone already. Ugh. Link to comment
lemsip Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 In my case, the difficulty with blocking her is that we have about 100 mutual friends, so I just deactivated but I can't shut out my other friends on FB forever. At some point I have to move past this... I'm approaching the stage of activating my account again - my mate has the password. He has all my photos backed up on a USB drive and when I give him the go ahead he will delete/block my ex and delete every photo of her on my account. Sounds like a military operation haha. Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 I'm approaching the stage of activating my account again - my mate has the password. He has all my photos backed up on a USB drive and when I give him the go ahead he will delete/block my ex and delete every photo of her on my account. Sounds like a military operation haha. It's good that you have someone that can help you in this process without judging you about going "overboard". Everyone in my life seems to think, "It's just a breakup". Great friend you have there. Link to comment
symbiot Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 One thing that happened in May was I decided to change all my accnt passwords cause she had them all and when I went to my security settings I could see when I was logged in for the last couple mos. and guess what!? It had me logged in a couple wks prior on a Mac. I don't have a Mac. I know her sister does and she said that her next comp. was gonna be a Mac. so her Mom prob bought her one after the B/U. No telling how many times she logged in as me and for what? She left me. What the heck was she looking for? She wouldn't call, txt or email but it's ok to snoop behind my back. I just don't get it. Link to comment
lemsip Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 It's good that you have someone that can help you in this process without judging you about going "overboard". Everyone in my life seems to think, "It's just a breakup". Great friend you have there. He's been there. And I'll be there for the next one of my mates that goes through this. It's funny, as ridiculous as this sounds, I'm almost at the point where I've got so used to the raw pain I don't mind it. It makes me realise I'm human, and I feel more "at one" with myself than I have in a long, long time. Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted September 2, 2011 Author Share Posted September 2, 2011 One thing that happened in May was I decided to change all my accnt passwords cause she had them all and when I went to my security settings I could see when I was logged in for the last couple mos. and guess what!? It had me logged in a couple wks prior on a Mac. I don't have a Mac. I know her sister does and she said that her next comp. was gonna be a Mac. so her Mom prob bought her one after the B/U. No telling how many times she logged in as me and for what? She left me. What the heck was she looking for? She wouldn't call, txt or email but it's ok to snoop behind my back. I just don't get it. I think the curiosity sometimes gets the best of us. I snooped on my ex for a while but it got a bit old. Now I just snoop the surface lol. It's probably just as bad for me, but at least I'm not invading his more private stuff. God knows I don't even want to go there. Probably just means nothing though. He's been there. And I'll be there for the next one of my mates that goes through this. It's funny, as ridiculous as this sounds, I'm almost at the point where I've got so used to the raw pain I don't mind it. It makes me realise I'm human, and I feel more "at one" with myself than I have in a long, long time. I can't deny my friends have been nice to me post-breakup, but they just don't understand why it's taken me so long, since the relationship itself was short-lived. It's almost embarrassing to say I'm STILL not over it. It's a great type of friendship to have like that though. Link to comment
SeekFortitude Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I do not. Why? This is from another thread I posted on.... Link to comment
Danny77 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 4 words: De Act Iv Ate Hahaha!!! Although I laugh, I promise you that this is the only advise you need on this subject. My healing improved tenfold upon deactivating. "oooh I like looking at the pics" - "I don't want them to think i'm being childish" - "I'm not ready yet" shut up! You have to listen to how crazy this sounds from another perspective. Nothing good can ever, ahem..... EVER, come from checking their facebook. You'll get sick of wondering who that guy 40feet behind her in that shop window is, and why is he looking at her? Are the together? Blah blah blah.... Deactivate and you'll see how much better you feel. It's unbelievable how it helps. I found it hard to let go too but, when I did, boy oh boy I just regretted not doing it sooner. Link to comment
SeekFortitude Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Hahaha!!! Although I laugh, I promise you that this is the only advise you need on this subject. My healing improved tenfold upon deactivating. "oooh I like looking at the pics" - "I don't want them to think i'm being childish" - "I'm not ready yet" shut up! You have to listen to how crazy this sounds from another perspective. Nothing good can ever, ahem..... EVER, come from checking their facebook. You'll get sick of wondering who that guy 40feet behind her in that shop window is, and why is he looking at her? Are the together? Blah blah blah.... Deactivate and you'll see how much better you feel. It's unbelievable how it helps. I found it hard to let go too but, when I did, boy oh boy I just regretted not doing it sooner. Well said Danny. Link to comment
LaKings55 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I deleted my fb (permanently not just deactivated as I rarely used it anyway) But before I did, I blocked my ex and her friends Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I deleted and blocked exes from bad break ups. But have them all unblocked now. Sometimes I have a look at their pages out of curiosity. But its more a detached interest than anything else now. If anything makes me realise how happy I am without them and makes me feel good about the choices i've made. Link to comment
MissMazzi Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 It's good that you have someone that can help you in this process without judging you about going "overboard". Everyone in my life seems to think, "It's just a breakup". Great friend you have there. I can relate. I tried to open up to someone today and they just bluntly replied with, "It's getting a bit silly now..." to which I decided I wouldn't complain to anyone ever again -_- This is the only accepting place it seems. Link to comment
symbiot Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 That is absolutely ridiculous. I stopped talking to my friends a long time ago cause I could tell they thought I was going overboard. At the sametime the all admitted that they had never felt the way I felt for anyone before. Everyone who knows me knew how happy I was and I think some were jealous that they themselves had not experienced a love like mine. I guess I made them side on both ends. Link to comment
Thorshammer Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I saw her fb yesterday, i saw something small, friending her new friends bf. For some reason i took this as them all going out and partying, which is probably accurate. I am furious with rage and its not even that serious, i cant even imagine how i would react if it was a new guy, or her drinking in a pic. I wont block her, its been a month and 2 weeks, to do it now shows I am still stuck on her, and i wont delete my page; i have family and friends on there. BLEH! Link to comment
donpeel83 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I can relate. I tried to open up to someone today and they just bluntly replied with, "It's getting a bit silly now..." to which I decided I wouldn't complain to anyone ever again -_- This is the only accepting place it seems. I find the same thing hun. Other than my parents the only place that dosent mind me talking out my feelings is this site. This site is a God send to be fair. Link to comment
tacs1895 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 Quite apart from dealing with my ex, I have a kind of love/hate relationship with facebook. Sometimes I think it's just full of so much **** and it annoys me, but then other times I do like being able to see some people's updates and pictures. I've considered leaving it at times, but basically it's not really an option as so many events and gigs are only advertised on facebook so I'd miss out on a lot of what's going on (I'm a full-time musician). As for my ex, well I never un-friended her as I think at the time I thought it was just a bit petty. Not trying to say that all people who un-friend exes are petty, just that at the time it seemed like it wasn't really the point. We broke up 7 months ago now, so to do it now having left it this long seems a bit pointless. Also at this stage I'm not sure it would gain me anything much anyway. I haven't looked at her page for months now, I have the will power to leave it alone. I hid her from the news feed bit, so I don't see her status updates. And I've recently done the same for mutual friends that quite often mention her in their own updates. Sometimes when I log on then I see she's online, and that can bug me sometimes. And also I quite often check if she's replied to certain event invitations, which is actually quite useful because mostly I'd prefer to miss an event (depending what it is) rather than have to see her. I hope that side of things changes gradually because it is hard having to miss out on things... I have to see her for professional music stuff (rehearsals and gigs) fairly regularly anyway, and that's hard enough for now, without dealing with seeing her in social situations. Link to comment
Melting Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 The day he dumped me, I removed him from fb..... the only way to go! Link to comment
Danny77 Posted September 2, 2011 Share Posted September 2, 2011 I saw her fb yesterday, i saw something small, friending her new friends bf. For some reason i took this as them all going out and partying, which is probably accurate. I am furious with rage and its not even that serious, i cant even imagine how i would react if it was a new guy, or her drinking in a pic. I wont block her, its been a month and 2 weeks, to do it now shows I am still stuck on her, and i wont delete my page; i have family and friends on there. BLEH! Block her. It won't show you're stuck on her. If you wait til something actually happens then block, that'll be worse. Do it while it's still neutral. Shell just think there's stuff you don't want her to see on ur FB maybe? Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted September 3, 2011 Author Share Posted September 3, 2011 I can relate. I tried to open up to someone today and they just bluntly replied with, "It's getting a bit silly now..." to which I decided I wouldn't complain to anyone ever again -_- This is the only accepting place it seems. I know, right? That's why I keep coming back. My friends haven't been that supportive at all. Leave ENA for only 2 WEEKS, 2 WEEKS, and look at how many bad decisions I made. Still had the friends but not ENA. Hi, I'm Tryp and I'm an ENA addict, lol. I know checking was a bad choice but it actually just made me laugh that my ex needs a clone of me in his life. The text had affected me enough anyway. It's just that I would hate to think I'm the only masochist around. I WILL NOT CHECK. I WILL NOT CHECK. I WILL NOT CHECK. God—I don't even have a FB anymore, and yet it's still an issue Link to comment
RitaTrue Posted September 3, 2011 Share Posted September 3, 2011 I find the same thing hun. Other than my parents the only place that dosent mind me talking out my feelings is this site. This site is a God send to be fair. TRUTH. Before finding this site, I was airing all my complaints onto another site. Worked for a while. Except, after a while, I felt guilty that all the people I friended were getting a copy of all my crap, and hearing the S.O.S. over and over. And that's what inspired me to look for a forum that talked about break ups. And I found this site. This place really IS a Godsend. Link to comment
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