Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[rosarioT]

why are u calling me? what do you need now? Because u only call when u want something or when you need reassurance that I'm still here taking your calls like an idiot.. well, keep calling but I won't answer... and yes I'm scare of what I may feel once u get tired and never call again, I'm scare because I know it will hurt, but then I will start healing

[jjbinks]

I miss u again today. Knowing "us" is dead keeps hitting hard. I still love u so much it hurts. I miss u and I cried at the gym. Things just aren't the same without u big I wish we could snuggle and kiss. I got lost today and ended up at the airport. Boom. Flashbacks of picking u up the sad goodbyes. I could c u again for the minutes I drove by I swear. Then I just missed us. Your plane has flown out of this airport and now not only are we miles apart. But we are hearts apart too. Mine misses yours bc it still feels like home to be there. I wish u could kiss me, hold me, pretend w me.

[peaceOfmind78]

OK. I haven't seen you for 2 days now.

SHOW YOUR FACE!

Where are you?!?!?!?

 

Are you partying with your friends tonight?

 

I'm not, but I'm hanging out tomorrow instead....busy day!

(1) Taking my car to the shop for an oil change. hopefully that's all there is to be done!

(2) running around the marina for 4 miles! Wish me well!!!!

(3) Baby care class with bro and fiance at 1p?? I don't know if I'll make it but it would be good if I could for babysitting purposes >_

(4) Baby shower at 2pm

(5) Comedy show at 8pm

 

So, my plates full! It feels great just knowing how busy I will be without you. I know it's not a competition, but I'm just saying that I won't have to think of you most of the day...wondering what you're doing without me, etcetera...

 

It would've been nice to have spent more time together versus secretly hanging out with your friends without me and my knowledge!

 

In my next relationship, I would assert myself more. There.

[jt214]

Name,

 

I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I had to leave but studying abroad was something that I had always planned on doing. Leaving you was the hardest thing I ever had to do, and while being here definitely has its perks, I still miss you and think about you nearly every second of every day. You're the only girl I've ever been in love with. My friends, even your best friend, believe that I am too good for you but that never made me love you any less. All it did was make realize how much I love you because normally I am influenced by my friends but in this case it had no effect on me whatsoever.

 

I'm sorry that you can't express how you're really feeling right now to me. I hate that every time we talk on Facebook you can't tell me that you miss me. Instead you tell me that you miss your other friend, who is a huge loser that no one likes. I miss waking up to you so much that it kills me every time I roll over and you're not there. I'm sorry that you refused to try long distance, but I know that it probably would not have worked.

 

I really hope that you will consider getting back together with me in the fall. I know that our relationship wasn't perfect, but it made us happy nonetheless. I envision spending my last year of college with you at my side, not sleeping around anymore. You have no idea how bad it's been this past month. I keep thinking about what it will be like when I see you again. I don't know if I'll be able to hold in my nervousness, or if it will feel natural, as if I never left. I have tried to stop dwelling on it, and remember that I will still be the person I was when I return, the one you fell for. I love you to death and I miss you every day.

[Starrgrl]

^ okay I know we're probably not supposed to reply to messages posted in this thread but.

You sound like such a sweet guy. Your girl was very lucky. I wish more guys were mature like this in their early early 20s.

[Starrgrl]

T

 

I don't really have anything to say to you anymore.

Hundreds of messages later. All of them you'll never read.

I'm finally over you.

 

You really had nothing I would want. And now that I think about it, if I settled for you, I would have been downgrading like mad.

In all aspects. Lol it's great to not hurt like how I hurt anymore. I feel so free.

[Starrgrl]

But I will always always love you. And I'll always think about you. You will always take a special place in my heart. Peace out bub.

[Love1336]

I'll miss you more than you'll ever know.

There not a day i don't think about you.

Every single bloody morning you always pop in my head, and i look at my cell to see if you text me. Oh course you never do. haha.

I'm forgetting what your voice sounds like, your touch, your smell everything.

Even those you treated me like crap i seriously don't know how to forgive you nor let you go.You were my moron, my baby, my love. lol.

I know I'll find somebody to treat me with respect and love someday. but for now i'll miss you.

[mickey079]

I hope you wake up one day and realise the love and family you selfishly threw away, I hope you realise your real parents will turn their backs on you again like they have all your life, I hope you realise no one will ever possibly be able to love you the way I did.

 

We shared so many great times together, we shared so many laughs. I miss you more and more each day but I shouldn't, I miss your smell, your eyes, your freckle on your lip, I miss how when we kissed it was perfect and I miss how when we hugged our bodies fit perfectly with each other.

 

Just remember, the guy you are with isn't a good person, he lied and stabbed his best friend (me) in the back to get you, he lost his virginity to a prostitute, he kills animals for fun (and you love animals), he sees woman as objects and he was never raised in a healthy loving family.

 

I am doing great, I have a new job on the other side of the country, I'm earning over $2000 a week, I have made new friends, I am traveling for my 21st birthday, my sister is pregnant, but mostly my family have given me so much love and support, just step back and look at what you threw away...

[rosarioT]

so now that is Friday u don't call... are u with her? are u high? are u home alone? are u getting into any trouble? are u not calling me on porpoise or are u too busy to even think about me tonight?

[jjbinks]

I miss u too much I'm hurting. I'm conflicted within. I want to run to you and beg you to be mine, part of me. The other part wants me to rip my heart out and remember the bad times. The side that's winning right now? The one that wants to run to you and keep you. I dk why tonight is so hard. I am breaking inside all over again

[Love1336]

=(

I feel so sad reading other people post, yet i never felt so connected to people I've never before in my life and chances are will never meet.

I don't know why but knowing there is somebody with my exact pain makes me feel I'm normal and not shameful to feel this way.

WE WILL GET THROUGH THIS!

THIS PAIN SHALL PASS!

[piruru]

I don't want to care about you anymore. I don't want to. But why do you keep finding ways to come into my life? Why do I keep having to find out about you? Why do I keep seeing reminders of you? Reminders of the things you used to do? I've thrown all of the objects away yet the memories won't go away.

 

Why don't you leave this place? It's too small for you. It will be easier for me.

 

My life SHOULD be all about ME ME ME but somehow all I can think about lately is you. And you don't even care.

 

You have a girlfriend. Okay, I get it. But somehow a tiny flame is still going in my heart. I want to crush it. I know you're stubborn and that we will never work out. I just want to be with you...and that's all I know right now.

 

Autumn 2010. Does it mean as much to you as it does to me? White knit scarves. Matching sweaters. Pancakes. Curry. Paul Smith shirts. Taxis. Mustard shoes. Freakishly cold nights spent together on Leigh Street. You tore a leaf into the shape of my eye. In an instant, it was all gone with the wind.

 

I want to forget it all.

[Yostina]

I'm struggling with letting go of you. I just want you. It's killing me. I'm weary.

I wish I knew how you feel about me now, but I never will.

[Starrgrl]

^ yostina you must let him go. I know somewhere inside you still hope that he'd come back but it's time to stop hoping.

Place him in the past and know that if it's meant to happen, and you're meant to come together with him again, it will happen.

I see you're having difficulty too, like me before, and I just realised at some point there's no point dwelling and reminscing cos if they were so great, they wouldn't have hurt us.

[rosarioT]

where r u?

[Robin2904]

12 days. I keep counting the days like the higher the number gets the better it will make me feel. Monday will be 2 weeks and guess what? I'm still hurting. I'm still SO hurt that you could just put me out of your mind, your life like that. Just let me walk away like I was nothing to you- just a stranger you gave a ride to the bus station. How could you just let me go like nothing? You really are over me aren't you? I don't even cross your mind I bet. It hurts so much. Some days are worse then others. Yesterday was a good day- I was with my friends- the pain stopped for a while. But today I'm home alone and all I can do is miss you.

 

It's Saturday- I bet you'll be going out tonight. On a date with some girl, or to the club to act like a single stud. That's what you want right. You may be fine now, may be enjoying single life- lots of different girls to choose from-but there is going to come a point where the lonliness will set in and you'll miss me there to fill that void. I know you will. You may find someone to fill it- temporarily- but your going to miss me. No one will be there for you the way I was- put up with your crap like me. Hell even you would be amazed at how I put up with all your 'psychoness' as you called it. Your crazy schedule, your cooking habits, your diets, gym schedule, body building routine. I put up with it all because I loved you. You'll get to a point where you'll see that no one else will and you'll wish I was still there.

 

Although I won't hold my breath until then. Because I see that now your perfectly fine. I wish I had the ability to move on like you do. Find another guy to distract me as fast as you have found other girls. Because that's how you heal- its always been- you find a girl to take your mind off of it. I'm not like you- I don't just jump to the first guy I see to stop the hurting. I WISH i could be like you in that way- but I'm not.

 

When I think about it- I mean REALLY think about it I see how much of a player you really always were. You don't even realize it. You use girls to make yourself feel better. To boost your ego. I'm not sure WHY I wanted you back when I really think of all of this. It still disgusts me how you used that Vikki girl when we broke up the first time. And that poor girl from Wyoming you met online- or where ever the heck it was. You lead her on- lead them both on- and we were only apart a few weeks. And then when we worked things out you shot them both down like the player you are. You played THEM for ME. I should have really saw your true colors then.

 

And after ALL that. After EVERYTHING. Even after the pain of seeing you 2 weeks ago- how you rejected me, hurt me. I do still miss you.

 

But I will be fine. I'm getting better. It hurts but it doesn't cut through me like it used to. I'm getting on with my life and realizing there will never be an us again.

[Psychgirl24]

I dont understand why it had to end like this after years of being together. I'm devastated, yet you seem fine. And even though I still love you, the fact that you could just walk away so easily makes me hate you.

[Love1336]

I'm so tempted right now to check on your page. UGH.

Why do i have that urge to hurt myself?

Why do i care if you have another woman in your life?

WHY?

[Helpmetoheal]

Where were you last night? Past midnite and not home...hmmm. I have been waiting for you to contact me for almost a week now. You said you would think about things, or were you just saying that to get me to leave?? Well guess what the more you ignore me and blow me off the more determined I become. I will get my answers.

[wiley]

Its been 2 days since i've taken everything that reminds me of you OUT of my life. You said wanted 'space', but was using it as a cowardly way of ending us.

 

I still have no answer but I will get ME back. 2 days and im feeling good now there are no reminders of you. I wish you all the happiness in the world, maybe one day we can be friends again like we started off as, but for now I need to find myself again.

[Drake7]

I find myself wishing you never existed. To me, it is like you died that day you broke it off. You couldn't face me and used a cowards approach over the phone. I cried till I collapsed and felt like I died. you cried too but not as hard as me and now you smile as if nothing happen or as if I never existed. Your nothing but a walking slab of sample meat like at a grocery store. Other men will come in for a nibble for as long as your body still "lives" till your nothing but a decayed shell. You are no longer alive inside and the woman I loved in you is gone, and the man that loved you dead as well. The man I was before I met you went to sleep but is now awakened to become as he was supposed to be. I mark the 23 of January 2011 when two lovers died, one stabbing the other.

 

Farewell forever, you will not be mourned.

[Robin2904]

I still miss you but I'm doing better. I feel like in able to let go a little better. I'll always have a soft spot for you, care about you but I see now that I can survive with out you. We just weren't meant to be. Plain and simple. It's been 2 weeks and while it does still hurt me that you could just let me go, I see now it wad for the best. It's better to have a clean break then to have the pain linger. And I'm doing better and I'll get back to the point where I'm great again.

 

It feels good to know I can do it with out you. That I don't need you. I was always so independent. It feels good to see that coming back. Do wish the best for you. And hope your happy, I just don't want to know about it. Take care old friend.

[delsolar16]

It’s interesting how you say that you are superior to me partly because you have more friends than me, and then say that you used me because you were really lonely. Do you ever hear yourself speak? The immaturity shines through in your email. It’s like you just wanted to think of as many insults as you can and shove them in to a few paragraphs because you were angry.

 

Did you ever realize that during this whole relationship, almost everything was about you? You wanted to complain about school almost every day we talked. I listened. You were in pain and needed someone to talk to. I was there. Remember when I finished my first medical school interview and you were the first one I called as soon I could get to my phone? Remember what you said when I tried to talk to you about it? “Nick, let me call you back later. I’m watching the Colbert/Stewart rally on TV right now, and it’s a once in a lifetime thing. We can talk about your interview anytime.” And then when we talked two hours later, instead of apologizing, it ended up being a two-hour long discussion about how I was a burden to you.

 

I always wanted to know what you wanted. I wanted to be as close to perfect as I could for you. I grew my hair out because you said you would like it better. I grew a beard because you said you had always wanted a boyfriend who had one. I ran 6 miles a day and worked my abs out for 3 months so I could look good when I got there for you. I get there and you don’t even want to shave your legs. It would inconvenience you too much and you just don’t like to do it. And then you say that I should gain weight, because you want to feel dainty around me like you have felt with your other ex-boyfriends.

 

And remember how I stayed up and did my best to take care of you. And then the next day I was exhausted and taking a nap. I heard you come in and so I woke up so I could spend time with you. You asked if I wanted a sandwich and I said sure. You looked back at me as you were walking to the kitchen with this awful expression on your face and said “Uhh...are you expecting me to make it and bring it to you?” I’m sorry to be so presumptuous. I forgot that you are to never do anything for me. You never have. Why should I have thought that at the time? My mistake.

 

I’m not like you. When I’m angry, I don’t say things I don’t mean. I don’t try to inflict emotional pain on you. I don’t want to hurt your feelings and make you feel miserable. But you are 21, and for some reason you had me convinced that you were mature. I guess part of me just wanted to believe it even though I had no evidence to support it.

 

And remember when I visited you and you kept saying that I should move to be with you, and we started looking for jobs online? And then two days later you said that I shouldn’t move. And then two weeks after that you said I should move, and started sending me all of these jobs that I could apply for. And then I applied for them, and did a phone interview, and was basically offered the job. I thought you’d be ecstatic when I told you I had a job lined up, but you weren’t. You changed your mind again and said I shouldn’t move.

 

You don’t feel things as deeply as I do. When you dropped me off at the airport after my first visit, I cried. You said it was a turnoff and “What kind of person cries in public? Do you have no shame?” That will always strike me as something that is completely odd about you. You should have given me a list of emotions I am not allowed to express in a public place. That would have been helpful.

 

Remember that letter you wrote me? I watched you cry over skype as you read it silently to yourself before you sent it. You wrote how you have every intention of spending the rest of your life with me. You said that you had wanted to tell me that you loved me a long time before you actually did. You said that for so long you had been emotionally dead, but I made you feel again. You said I brought you back from the dead, and that your mom is happy to finally have her daughter back. That was all temporary though wasn’t it, because soon after that, you could never express any emotions towards me. You could never communicate to me how you really felt. You would always say “I don’t know” when I asked how you felt. And 3 weeks after you sent me that letter you were completely gone emotionally from the relationship.

 

Every time I go out on to the back patio and look at the swing we have, I always think about how I sat on that swing one Sunday morning and talked to you on the phone. During that conversation you said you would never lie, cheat, or ignore me. It meant so much to me. I didn’t even ask you to say it…you just said it. It’s strange how quickly your feelings change and how easily you can break promises.

 

You never wanted me to be happy. After we broke up and kept calling each other for the next two weeks, you hated it every time I sounded happy. Remember when you called me and I was driving to go play tennis with my friends and I was having a really good day? It really got to you, and out of nowhere you said “So my mom really hates you.” You wanted to bring me down. And then I said I don’t want to be torn down and I want to continue to have a good day, so I got off the phone with you. And then you sent me a text that said “you are losing me.” Nice try. I can be happy without you…I’m allowed. And then we talked later at midnight and I was trying to tell you about this really happy moment I had during while I was driving home from Fayetteville and you kept saying “why would those things make you happy? That’s weird. It’s not normal.”

 

You never supported my interests. In fact, they were a turnoff for you. What I don’t get it is why you would get in to a relationship with me even though you knew these things about me beforehand. You hate that I play golf. I don’t get it. You hate it, and yet you’ve never set foot on a golf course. But apparently you hate it enough to hold it against me and make you think less of me. You refused to ever go on a golf course with me. What happened to taking an interest and supporting me with my hobbies? Whenever you told me you liked racing, I started researching, watching videos, watching races, talked to you about it. I was trying to learn all I could about the sport so you could share your interest with me. Not once would you ever consider doing that. You are selfish.

 

You couldn’t believe that I would “be so stupid” as to believe in a god when I was 16. And now you hold that belief against me as if I still do. That is crazy. You’re the one going to a naturopath and taking homeopathic remedies. If you only knew how stupid you were for taking them, but I never said anything. I never held it against you, because I knew you were desperate to find a cure for what you have. That’s how people get trapped in worthless alternative medicine. It will never make you better.

 

How could you use me for the last two weeks that we talked? You strung me along day after day, saying you didn’t know if you wanted to get back together or not. You said you wanted to see me one more time. And then the moment you meet somebody else, you send me a text saying that we shouldn’t talk anymore. How mature of you. But you never really cared when you hurt me, so why should I have expected anything different.

 

Did you ever notice how every time you would have a problem, I could sense it even though you weren’t telling me? And then it would hurt me, and when I tried to talk to you about it, you made me feel like my feelings were “wrong”. Like I shouldn’t be feeling what I’m feeling. And then you’d get mad at me, and after some great manipulating on your part, I would end up apologizing by the end of the conversation. Have you realized how many times you’ve apologized to me in the past? I could count them on one hand. It’s something you rarely do.

 

I would love for you to one day realize that your very last words to me were completely and utterly, over-the-top vindictive and hurtful. I would love for you to call me or send me an email and apologize for what you said and tell me that you were being immature and selfish and that you didn’t mean any of those things. But I know you won’t. You aren’t big enough. And you also aren’t mature enough to come to that realization. But that’s what I get for getting involved with a 21 year old isn’t it.

 

You said we shouldn’t talk for the moment because it’s not healthy for either of us. And then I backed off and never said anything. Five days later you write me that scathing email. You said that you met someone else and that you are happy. I know you aren’t happy. He may make you happy sometimes, but you will never truly be happy…it’s not part of who you are. You are a sad, depressed girl who is always in pain. He can’t change that. I remember that one night chatting with you and you said out of nowhere “I wish there was a purpose to life so I wouldn’t randomly and nonchalantly consider taking my own life.” And you stated that you seriously consider it sometimes. I had forgotten that I saved that conversation and emailed it to myself. I must have seen a huge red flag at the time.

 

Your email also showed me that you haven’t moved on, and that you are trying to convince yourself to hate me so you can get over me. Good luck with that. I don’t quite know exactly what you can hate about me. Every time you mention something you don’t like about me, it’s so insignificant like you’re just grasping at straws – trying to think of anything you can to convince yourself. When you start talking to new boyfriends about problems that you had with your ex’s, you will tell them of those that treated you badly, that never cared about you, that were always jerks to you and had no ambition in life. And then you’ll think of me, and what will you say?

[Starrgrl]

Wow. You know this is the first day where I went nearly a whole day without thinking of you once. It's nearly 8pm now.

Guess keeping busy is the way to go.

Cyas.