Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[anthony4]

so today you are in the hospital for your surgery. i told you before we broke up, over a month ago i had wanted to be there while you were going through this traumatic time. i wish you well. i will not contact you to tell you that. i don't hate you.

[Soloman]

I miss you. This stuff comes in the most sickening waves. I know the waves are becoming fewer and fewer and are getting weaker and weaker, but they are still so powerful when you're this mentally razed.

 

How are you? What have you been up to? How is Theodore? How was your trip? What did you do? How is everything going with work? What are your future plans? Still gonna move in 10 months? How's your Mom, and your brothers? Have you talked to your dad? How are things going with your pursuit of lucid dreaming?

 

I want to know all these things, but I cannot fuel this addiction any further than I will naturally.

 

I wish I could make you see the mistake you're making. I was reading something today about a 22 year old with a terminal (eventually) and debilitating genetic disorder, and how she's going to school to be a science teacher, even though she knows she might not make it far enough to teach at all. She talks about digging into someone that cares about you because time is limited. That's how I see it, but for some reason, you can't see it. You're still making a mistake.

[nutcase720532]

Today was suppose to be our day, right now you would probably be getting ready at home freshing up so we could dance the night away today.....

Im still going out to the rave today, I wish you could have just called me and we could have worked things out so today we could be going together. things still havent worked out.

Do I still even have a chance? Do you still think of me? Do you ever think we could be together as one again?

I miss you so much, I hate the fact that I have to drive pass ur place every day!

I miss you and everyday I move on, I dont want to move on.... but I guess its whats best.

[sunshine34]

you dont even want to be friends with me. its going to b like we never knew each other at all. i miss u, for who u were, for the old good times that were reall.now we are shadows

[boyblue]

After not speaking for so long now (nearly 2 months) I see where we both went wrong; I know I made mistakes and am more than willing to own up to them, and am sorry for saying the things I said to you. I cannot understand how you could go so cold and just want to be friends, I know you had been hurt in the past and I know you were sensitive and I realise I took you for granted and never treated you the way you so wanted to be treated, and this upset you and you took it out on me.

 

I wish you would have talked and told me how you were really feeling instead of shutting yourself off, as I know you were so used to doing.

 

When I think how when we first met you seemed to be so happy, putting your head on my shoulder when we first lay together, how when we lay on the couch and you seemed to content and happy lying with me, how we talked and talked till the small hours and we had so so much in common, and that we got on really well together (as you even said yourself), and it hurts me immensely that we longer share that, and we never tried to keep it going.

 

I really felt you were the one, I know we barely were together 6 months but this is how I felt and I still feel know and I really thought this was it, I had met the girl of my future, who I would settle down with, love. look after, share our lives together and go through good and bad times, and hopefully have kids with. I know we never uttered the L word when we were together but I know somewhere within you you did love me and I know I did and still do love you immensely.

 

No matter what I do in life I know I will always have a place in my heart for you and I dream every day that you will come back and fill it for me again.

 

Your always and forever babe xxxx

[Love1336]

'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me

And your heart starts to wonder where on this Earth I could be

Thinkin' maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet

And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street~Script - The Man Who Can't Be Moved

[Moonchill]

I was drunk and I spilled my heart out to you...

I wanted words but all I heard was..... nothing....

I got nothing

[beaglelover]

I loved you so much and so completely. You thought I stood you up that night when I had to go pickup my daughter and didn't make it back in time. You hurt me, yelled at me, got mad at me, made me feel awful and just as hurt as hurt as you were. You didn't give me the chance to explain. You said you would call me. You still made love to me. Now you haven't called. You say you will and you don't. What else could I have done? You said actions speak louder and my actions spoke but you won't let me have a chance to explain. I still love you completely but I can't go through this again. If your not going to call fine. I can't stand the thought of you with another woman. You pursued me like crazy and now you have forgotten? I can't do this. I love you but will have to move on. I have to quit crying and find my smile again. The smile you claimed to have loved so much.

[Helpmetoheal]

After everything I still miss being able to share my thoughts with you. I miss knowing what you're doing and how you're feeling. Its 2 months to the day since our break up. How did we get here "L"? With time and space I have been able to reflect on our relationship and what happened is making sense. I wondered how I could have so dilluted. I see now that the break up wasn't out of the blue for you. You had been thinking about it for some time and finally found your "courage" for lack of a better word to tell me. I look back and can actually pin point the time when things changed for you. Hind sight really is 20/20. I wish you would have talked to me about it then. Maybe things would have been different, but I don't think so. Maybe if you had told me about then I would be healed by now. But you didn't and I am not healed, far from. But further along than I was and I am thankful for small things.

 

I definitely see the benefit of NC even though I haven't been very successful at it. Its a constant struggle. This forum has been invaluable to me, I find hope in other people's posts and comfort in knowing that I am not the only one going through this. Nobody wants to the feel rejected and alone. Strength in numbers, this too shall pass!

[boomroasted]

I haven't talked to you in a week, and I know I have the strength to move on. But the knowledge of having the strength that I will move on and be happy and forge a life without you, doesn't mean I don't still ache so much for somehow having lost you. Maybe losing you was inevitable, but it doesn't weaken the dreams and vision I saw of all the happy times ahead for us. One of the hardest things for me to come to grips with is that every person is free to feel how they want and decide when they are in love and when they are not. No matter how much I ruminate the past and hope to find understanding, there's none to be found. There are no rules or restrictions in the way in which our emotions can shift. You are your own woman, and despite how much I love you, and how close we became, it is up to you to decide the people and relationships in your life. I know that I made mistakes but I take comfort in how good I was to you, and how much support I gave to you in such a difficult time in your life. It wasn't our time, and maybe there'll never be a time. I don't want to resent you, because you showed me a side of myself I've never seen before. But the questions of what if and why linger. They approach and recede like the tide. I've let you go, and its such a humbling feeling to see you move on despite how crazy I am about you. What a hapless situation. I love you, and want to see you find happiness in yourself and your own life. Goddamn it.

[sweetgirl15]

I wish you to be happy.

 

You loved how strong I was, I still AM despite everything.

[LonelyJedi]

I remember when I first met you in psychology class. You made me the happiest boy alive, and then you broke my heart. I decided to be strong for you, and be your friend until you made up your mind. I started to give up, and thought all of my efforts had been in vain... and like a new girl. But then you promised to change yourself, and I gave in even when all of my friends and family told me to run from you. I decided to give you a second chance, and forgive all of the pain you had caused me. You then reverted back to your old self, and distanced yourself once again. You broke my heart again, telling me that you are depressed and can't be with someone if you're unhappy with yourself. I almost believed it. You truly are a helpless fool. I gave you one last chance to redeem yourself... and this is how you repay me?

 

I'm sorry I couldn't be your knight in shiny armor. I tried my very best, and you bled me dry. There is nothing more I can do. I would have done anything for you, because you made me happy and I fell in love with you. You were my first love. Now, I have to stand up for myself and be stronger than ever. I can no longer allow you to cause me pain anymore. Our paths may cross again if we are destined to be together, but until that day... you need to get your life together and stop hurting people.

 

I went through hell and back trying to be the best I could be for you, and yet still it was not enough. I waited for you, for an entire year. Now, the tables have been turned.

 

Now YOU will know the horror...

[Robin2904]

I should definitely be working on my paper that's due at 8am tomorrow morning....now thinking of you! ARG! Why do you have to overtake my thoughts at the worst possible times?

 

It's been a long time- almost 2 months since we spoke. I'm struggling tonight a little bit. I looked at a few old pictures of you on that website. Even though I deleted myself I can still browse public pictures from their events. It made me sad. Those pictures were actually from July 31st- we had been fighting and you went to that event on your own that night. Remember how angry I was so I went out to that night- just to some bar. I had a * * * * ty time, thought of you the whole time. And afterward you told me you had a bad time too. You didn't look like you were having fun from those pictures honestly, even if you were talking to some girl in one of them

 

I had kinda forgotten what you looked like as dumb as it sounds- looking at those pictures brought it back a bit. Remember that stupid yellow shirt too arg. Been a few weeks since you texted me last- wonder if you ever will again. I'm not sure why you even did last time. You kept saying you would call me, but then would wind up saying you were busy. Do you know how many times you did that? After the second time I got the point- that you really didn't want to talk to me. But then why keep saying you would call? I don't get it. I guess you didn't want to come out and just say you didn't want to talk to me- guess you weren't that much of a jerk. Though I knew you were capable of being that much of a jerk- I actually have seen you do it to other girls, I don't know if it hurts me worse, or makes me glad to know you wouldn't do that to me.

 

I remember the first day we got together and some random girl had texted you a few times while we were together. Remember when you insisted you call her in front of me and tell her you weren't interested. That you had a girlfriend and wanted her to leave you alone. I think about it now and wonder if there would ever be a time where you would be so cruel to me and so something like that to me. If I were to call you now and you had someone, would you call me while you were with her and tell me off? I'm not so sure anymore.....since I am just a stranger in your past these days. It hurts.

 

Sometimes I think of all the things you have done like this, and wonder how many times have you done hurtful things like this to girls in the past? I remember when you actually DID call me when you were with that rebound girl Vikki the week after we split up- I bawled my eyes out and she laughed at me on speaker phone. Remember that? Wonder how many other girls were in that position. I'm sure many. I think about it though, and I know I did hurt you- I DO. And I AM sorry for it because I did love you so much. But sometimes I wonder if it was karma you had coming. I know you played many many girls, broke some hearts, maybe it was only fair you got yours broken too. If only it were that easy though because you broke mine too. I think my broken heart is probably worse because I know yours is pretty much healed and I'm the poor fool who's still left crying her eyes out, so I have to wonder who actually DID come out on top.

 

You want to know the really messed up thing? Despite it all, all the crap, the hurt, you rejecting me last time, treating me like ultimate crap- I still do love you. And I still miss you. And if you really really did show me you wanted me still and were serious about really trying again, as pathetic as it is I probably would give it another shot. But I know there is a better chance of Donald Trump showing up at my door tomorrow then of this happening.

 

I still miss you.

I still love you.

I hope you still miss me.

I hope you still love me.

 

I've been thinking of that Brian McNight song alot latley 'Do I ever cross your mind? Anytime. Do you every wake up reaching out for me? Do I ever cross your mind? Anytime. I miss you.'

 

Yeah....

[ambguitar]

So it has been over a month since the last time we talked to each other. And you know what, after the last crap you pulled I should never talk to you again. How could I fall for your crap over and over again. You seemed to be unable to stay away for no more than a month since now your trying your hardest to contact me again. Well guess what I'm trying my hardest to ignore you this time. Do you not understand what you did to me? You said you loved me. That I was your best friend, but you sure treated me really terrible. You sort of took me back 3 times since you started going out with him. Each time though it only lasted until he started to say that he was sorry or that he wanted you back. Each time that happened you just kicked me to the curb. Well you think I should just be friendly after all that? How do you think it would feel if someone did that to you. Pretty terrible, right? Like you're worthless in their eyes. So it's great you enjoyed the book I lent you a month ago and it sucks you got a tooth pulled today, but you know what sucks more? Being tossed aside for someone else after being built up again and again.

[jooj]

I really wish you tried harder to make this work, you just gave up so easily. I really loved you so much and I did everything I could to make you happy.

[Helpmetoheal]

Why can't I stop thinking about you? Get out of my thoughts and leave me alone, this is torture! ](*,) I have been through enough.

[Love1336]

Why does everyone at the job say you have changed? Better not be because of me.

I hate when people blame me for something i have no control of.

If you are an jerk because you choose to be one!

Not because I "broke" your heart. Pshhh. Give me a break.

[iBroken]

Your former boss thinks my pup is adorable and well behaved

 

She recognized me when I was in the clinic yesterday but couldnt put her finger on it. I didnt say much because my girlfriend was with me. The doc just called me to give me the results of my pups bloodwork. She mentioned again I looked familiar. When I mentioned why, the lightbulb went off.

 

Awkward!

[Love1336]

=/ I hate myself for still feeling the way i do for you. Even those i made soo much process, i know i would totally be back at stage one if you ever came back or even gave me a simple facebook message.

[jooj]

I'm so scared of facing the world without you. I love you so much, I beg you please come back to me, pleeeeeeeeeeeease!!!

[Moonchill]

So there's me:

Pouring my heart out to you

Apologizing to you

Making myself vunerable for you

Being honest to you and

Being honest to myself

 

Then there's you:

Not giving a &*^%# :sad:

Not caring enough about me to give me the slightest response!:sad:

 

Please don't have the guts thinking I want you back . Don't think this apology was a failed attempt to try to get you back. [-X

 

It was just a sincere apology after a fair amount of alcohol. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

So your silence is my answer to the questions that's been in my head all along:

"does he still care about me?"

"does he still miss me like I miss him?"

"would he make the effort of contacting me?"

"would he really be there for me like he promised me? "

 

NO

 

](*,)

[honesttoblog]

I don't know how I feel towards you anymore.

Last night I was looking through my old facebook posts and I came accross all the stuff you said on it, I seriously don't have the heart to delete it all. I know I should do because you're my ex and I'm over you, but I can't because a part of me misses what we had despite that it was for a short time. I'm too confused about my feelings towards a lot of people now, but I need to change. I don't like who I am any more, I hate how attached and dependent I get, so if spacing myself from the ones I love is the way to go then I will. I just wish I could rewind back to when I started secondary school and relive my life without any of my ex's and especially you.

[iwannarun]

It really doesn't hurt anymore. I've accepted that you are no longer in my life. To make sure of that, though, I finally did delete all your texts and your number. I make sure I never run into you, ANYWHERE, and I try not to think too much about you. Instead, I think a lot about leaving this city and traveling. I think about doing fun things this summer, going on vacations, exploring, learning to play the piano, etc. I do stay plenty busy without you, and I'm proud of myself for being able to be this strong finally. You're not a part of my life anymore, and you probably never will be again. I wish you the best, but I am done.

[Love1336]

You know what I'm really good at? Making myself sad.

UGHH! When will i accept you will NEVER be mine AGAIN?

Why isn't this going through my thick head?

 

YOU AND ME WILL NEVER BE TOGETHER AGAIN.

Accept it already.

Bleh. I hate school. Don't have a social life.

Why are you moving on so quicklyyy?

[Flint_Wood]

You're giving me an out... take it, take it, take it, take it...