Ask Women Thread

[LynnM28]

I would hesitate to give my phone number for many reasons, would be much more likely to want to connect on FB or Twitter or email first...women have to be cautious of "stranger danger" more than men...

[Ammy]

I let the guy initiate texts / calls more in the early stages, purely because if I initiate I feel like maybe I am "coming on too strong" / looking pushy / needy / desperate / clingy (silly because the guy doesn't seem that way if he initiates all the time?!).

 

Anyway that said, if the guy initiates say one day, then the next day I might initiate... I try and make it semi-even however I like the guy to be the one who initiates just a little bit more.

 

I wouldn't worry if the girl is not initiating, as long as she is replying in a fairly timely fashion chances are she is interested. We are taught to hold back as women in the early stages. If she is not replying however or replying very slowly, I would cut down on the texts. Never send multiple in a row when she has not replied.

 

Ammy

[JDMxTeGrA101]

I get your point amy but usually the girls are the ones who initiates the texts/calls with me and I end up getting bored for some reason. This one really caught my attention though as she does what I do and it keeps me guessing what am i doing wrong? I just don't want to come out desperate/needy either.

[Sty1es]

So ladies, how long is too long without having a girl you're dating initiate contact? Certain amount of dates? Months?

 

Right now I'm at a little over a month, and she only initiated contact once

 

And that message was "bye to you too lol" that was a couple days after our first date.

[JDMxTeGrA101]

Damn that sounds bad bro sorry! I spoke to the girl I like about 3 days ago. No text/call ever since and just trying to get my mind off her. Our next date will be soon though but I wish she would intiate contact more with me.

[Rotxsen]

Girls in the verge of a break up if the guy is pleading begging etc etc would you feel you have more power over them ? and what would you do ? some girls from what I seen and experience would use I have a new rebound thing so they can "hurt me" but it fails

[Sty1es]

Damn that sounds bad bro sorry! I spoke to the girl I like about 3 days ago. No text/call ever since and just trying to get my mind off her. Our next date will be soon though but I wish she would intiate contact more with me.

 

Does sound bad right? It's weird, when we see each other she's a different person and shows a lot of interest, but when we're not together it seems like she's not.

[JDMxTeGrA101]

I don't know what to tell you man but we are definitely on the same boat. Have you spoke to that girl you like yet? I'm deciding to call this one on monday just to keep in touch at least. Maybe she wants you to contact her instead.

[Sty1es]

I usually see her during break at work, and was thinking whether to call tomorrow or just wait until monday to talk to her.

[Celadon]

Girls in the verge of a break up if the guy is pleading begging etc etc would you feel you have more power over them ? and what would you do ? some girls from what I seen and experience would use I have a new rebound thing so they can "hurt me" but it fails

If I had decided a relationship wasn't working, I wouldn't want to be mean to the guy. It's hard enough to reject someone. But if he was begging, and I had already decided, then I'd probably feel uncomfortable and I'd have to be firm that this was the end. Period. Maybe the girls who say they have a rebound are trying to say "It's over; I've already moved on." And the girls who think in terms of "power" when they're already breaking up with you aren't worth your time.

[redsoles]

Girls in the verge of a break up if the guy is pleading begging etc etc would you feel you have more power over them ? and what would you do ? some girls from what I seen and experience would use I have a new rebound thing so they can "hurt me" but it fails

 

 

 

Yes. Girls feel powerful when you do this.

Don't do this. If someone does not want to be with you, accept it.

Truth is, we will respect you a whole lot more, and who knows you can be friends, and possibly date again.

[Theblueman123]

Okay women, would you stay with a guy who has cheated on you (with like sex or something)? Let's say that you truly love him or whatever

[yeawutever]

Okay women, would you stay with a guy who has cheated on you (with like sex or something)? Let's say that you truly love him or whatever

Never... that's been stated clearly. I just got back with b/f but cheating was never involved.

 

Sex with someone else... OUT. I can work out with a guy that was being distant, forgetful about certain stuff, silly arguments but no cheating..... I have no time nor patience to be with someone I can't trust.

In addition I don't even look at a man's email so if I ever had to then there's no point to being in a relationship.

[Celadon]

Okay women, would you stay with a guy who has cheated on you (with like sex or something)? Let's say that you truly love him or whatever

Nope. If I were married to a guy 20 years and he messed up, then maybe since we have all that history together. But a young guy who cheated ... there are a lot of other fish in the sea, so to speak. I don't need to be with a guy who is that selfish.

[milkyway17]

Okay women, would you stay with a guy who has cheated on you (with like sex or something)? Let's say that you truly love him or whatever

 

No way... Once a cheater, always a cheater. Especially with sex. Even with emotionally cheating. How are you going to trust them ever again? You'll always be a little suspicious.

[dangletsbang]

No way... Once a cheater, always a cheater. Especially with sex. Even with emotionally cheating. How are you going to trust them ever again? You'll always be a little suspicious.

 

 

So not true. I've cheated before - won't cheat again. I realize how bad I hurt that person and I wouldn't want to ever do that again to someone.

 

To the original question - depending on the situation..I would give the person who cheated on me a second chance if he was truly regretful in what he did.

[lila...]

Okay women, would you stay with a guy who has cheated on you (with like sex or something)? Let's say that you truly love him or whatever

 

I would only ever give him one more chance. People make mistakes sometimes, and though it would take a lot of work from his side to convince me it will work again, I would consider giving him another chance.

[LynnM28]

If my husband cheated, but wanted to work it out, I would. S**t happens sometimes, it would be easier for me personally to deal with if he had a stupid drunken night than if he was emotionally involved with someone else, but either way I would be willing to stay and fix things.

[J1535]

Would you find it weird if a guy you never really talked to too much but talked to every once in awhile asked you if you wanted to hang out sometime?

 

There's a girl I used to work with, didn't talk to her too much but we had some conversations. I want to ask her if she wants to hang out but I guess I'm scared of what she'll think since we aren't really close friends

[Celadon]

Would you find it weird if a guy you never really talked to too much but talked to every once in awhile asked you if you wanted to hang out sometime?

 

There's a girl I used to work with, didn't talk to her too much but we had some conversations. I want to ask her if she wants to hang out but I guess I'm scared of what she'll think since we aren't really close friends

It might help not to be too direct, then. Do you see her at all these days? Do you run into her?

 

If so, you might just bring up some fun things you're planning to do, and if she looks interested, say, "Hey, you're welcome to join me, if you're free. But no pressure."

 

You may have to do that a number of times before she takes you up on it, but it's less risky IMHO than saying, "Do you want to hang out with me?"

 

Of course, if you NEVER see her, that could be a problem. Are you Facebook friends or anything?

 

I remember a guy told me about this birdwatching event that he was going to. He clearly wanted to ask me to go with him but he didn't get the courage to do so. He just kept talking about the event details, etc. He should have handled it casually, like how I said above: "If you're free Saturday..." See, what a woman needs is to feel comfortable. If she's interested, she'll say YES. If she's not, she'll say NO and you two won't feel awkward. If she's unsure, then she'll say NO this time but hope for another opportunity later. Good luck.

[J1535]

I don't see her at all. We are friends on facebook and I have had a couple small conversations with her on there. I haven't seen her since we worked together, which was quite awhile ago

[LynnM28]

I don't see her at all. We are friends on facebook and I have had a couple small conversations with her on there. I haven't seen her since we worked together, which was quite awhile ago

 

If you are friends on FB I would use that forum to "open" the lines of communication..."Like" or comment on her status, her pictures, her post, whatever you can find that legitimately sparks or interests you (because the online world is savvy, and people's "bull * * * * " detectors are high, so you don't want to be interacting with her in a way that is not real for you) ...start slow, and just see how much she interacts back...if she's not on FB a lot it may be tougher, but if you provide interesting interactions with her she may be drawn to come on more often....

[J1535]

If you are friends on FB I would use that forum to "open" the lines of communication..."Like" or comment on her status, her pictures, her post, whatever you can find that legitimately sparks or interests you (because the online world is savvy, and people's "bull * * * * " detectors are high, so you don't want to be interacting with her in a way that is not real for you) ...start slow, and just see how much she interacts back...if she's not on FB a lot it may be tougher, but if you provide interesting interactions with her she may be drawn to come on more often....

 

Yea she's on there quite a bit. thanks for the advice, I commented on a picture of hers and she was very willing to talk back quite a bit to me, I will try to start more conversations with her and maybe I will be able to ask her to hang out soon

 

UPDATE

 

I saw she was online today so i sent her a message through facebook chat, we ended up talking for a little over an hour, haha I think we talked more than we ever did while we worked together.

 

I always feel like i'm bugging people when I talk to them though. But I guess she wouldn't talk to me for over an hour if she didn't want to right?

[Deejmonster]

So..

 

What does it mean when a girl smiles at you?

 

I mean.. ladies... are you trying to be nice or are you trying to be coy in saying that there is an attraction?

[LynnM28]

I saw she was online today so i sent her a message through facebook chat, we ended up talking for a little over an hour, haha I think we talked more than we ever did while we worked together.

 

I always feel like i'm bugging people when I talk to them though. But I guess she wouldn't talk to me for over an hour if she didn't want to right?

 

I'm so glad you got to chat! You might send her a quick inbox msg tomorrow and let her know you enjoyed chatting...and yes I agree, she would not chat for and hour if she did not want to talk to you!