Daligal83 Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 I'm completely shocked that nothing has happened and I'm meeting his parents...but SO excited! Link to comment
DN Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 OK - at the game is a perfect time to make your move and plant a great big kiss on him. Don't worry about his parents, they won't care. Well, maybe not. But when they are gone ... Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 Hahaha maybe not that but I could feel brave enough to take his hand. Meeting the parents is big, at least in my book. I'm still in shock. Seriously, I thought the whole thing was over. Link to comment
lady00 Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Not to burst your bubble...but I'm not too sure that going somewhere with his parents is a sign of romantic interest. People have invited a friend of the opposite sex to go to a family activity before. I know in a dating situation it normally is a sign that things are getting serious...but here I wouldn't be so sure especially because you two have not even kissed yet. Not trying to be a debbie downer. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Hahaha maybe not that but I could feel brave enough to take his hand. Meeting the parents is big, at least in my book. I'm still in shock. Seriously, I thought the whole thing was over. I think this is a great sign, Daligal. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 4, 2009 Author Share Posted September 4, 2009 OK, so I have no more answers but I'm not upset at all. I had SUCH a good time. First...box seats are freaking amazing. Even though we lost. I could live in those seats. Second, I love his parents. I really clicked with them and I think they liked me. At one point we split up because there's a guys line and girls line to get into the stadium. I made a comment to his mom that I'd probably never get to sit in seats like this again and she said something like, "well stick with us, we get stuff like this a lot." Don't know in what capacity she meant that...but I'm not freaking out over it. I had a lot of fun And he was pretty attentive. When we were walking he'd always be aware of where I was and usually walk right next to me. It was a good night regardless of how it turns out! Link to comment
annie24 Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 maybe you should invite him over to your place for dinner to thank him for those great seats! Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 4, 2009 Author Share Posted September 4, 2009 Yea the next time we talk I'm going to try again to get him to come visit me. Still hard though cause this weekend my friend is visiting and next weekend he has his cousin's wedding. That's on a Friday or Saturday though, so maybe he can come on Sunday. And after that, he's working on Saturdays and football is on Sundays. Plus I've still got those three weddings to go to. We'll see what happens when I bring it up. I think I'll call him tomorrow night since my friend is coming in on Saturday and not leaving until Monday afternoon. Link to comment
Gnomex Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 Its a great feeling to spend time with someone you truly like. None of us would continue to look for our soul mate, if the road we traveled never had a nice view However, vbased on what I have reviewed through out this thread you might be in the friends zone. I am sure he has feelings for you. However, the fear of getting involved with someone on the romantic level turns the bravest of us into babbling children. You have two options from my perspective.. One, communicate your worries. Option two: become slightly more agressivbe and hold his hand and snuggle up next to him when you have the oppertunity. Most guys, will enjoy the attention and hopefully this will answer your question at last. I hope this helps. Link to comment
pinkrobot Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 Ahhhh the anticipation is killing me! It's like watching a really intense chick flick...when you KNOW the guy and the girl are gonna end up together, but you have to painstakingly watch as they battle all sorts of obstacles to get there. Lol. I know you said you're not freaking out over what his mom said...but to me, it sounds like she knows more than you do--perhaps about how he feels about you? Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 4, 2009 Author Share Posted September 4, 2009 Haha that's what I'm hoping she meant! I just don't want to over analyze. And when we came out of the box, the guy, his dad and I went in one direction and his mom went in another. Then the guy agreed with his mom and said we should go that way. His dad laughed and put his arm around me saying that we were outvoted or something. I thought it was good that he was being nice with me like that already. Now if only the guy would do that!!! I don't know though...the last guy I had a thing with, everyone thought we'd end up together and it suddenly ended before it started. There are threads on him. And I'm still scared that I'm reading this all wrong and if I go to take his hand he'll be like, what the heck are you doing? Link to comment
annie24 Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 i don't know - you can try physical contact that's physical, but not over the top. like maybe hugging him goodbye, or slapping his arm lightly when he says something funny. or if you see a funny dog crossing the street, touch his arm to get his attention and say, 'look!' just go for it. Link to comment
lady00 Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 I can see why you'd be hesitant. I don't know...his behavior is a bit odd to me in a dating situation. He's given you every reason to believe he is interested...except he hasn't made a move. It's puzzling. Brings to mind one of my favorite quotes from the movie Bridget Jones' Diary: "There's been all these bloody hints but has he ever stuck his tongue down your throat?!" LOL. I love that quote...it's very...erm...to the point (and has a lot of words I can't type here in the real version!) I have to say, I'm stumped! I think it's awesome when people want to take things slowly and get to know each other, but usually there is at least a peck (even just on the cheek!) or hand-holding involved. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 4, 2009 Author Share Posted September 4, 2009 annie, I have done those things!! We usually hug hello and goodbye. I'm not great at the touching arm lightly thing, but I've definitely done it. I think maybe that at this point, it's been so long and neither one of us is making a move, we're both freaked out about doing it. Link to comment
Gnomex Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 The worst part that I would consider being in this situation is the emotional stress that comes with it. It is always an awesome feeling to know that someone cares for you as much as you care for them. However, perhaps with a little more time, things will become clearer. You never know how prior experiences will cause a person to hesitate and second guess their feelings. Hopefully, with a little direct action on you or his side, this will be a stepping stone to something memorable. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 5, 2009 Author Share Posted September 5, 2009 See, I'm also scared of making myself look stupid. I just feel dumb being like, um, do you like me? Not that I'd say it like that of course, but it's the same message. If he's not interested, maybe he thinks that he's sent clear signals that he just wants to be friends and I'm totally reading them wrong. It's just so confusing because some people say he's not ready, some say he's just shy, and some say he's not interested. I know he's the only one with the answer, but I just wish I didn't have to ask to find out what it is. Link to comment
pinkrobot Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 But at this point, it is absolutely reasonable to come out and simply ask, "I'm confused about where we stand, as far as whether or not this is a friendship or something more." And it's also reasonable for you to explain why you're confused (esp. because this all stemmed from a date). I would be surprised if this conversation came as a surprise to him--he HAS to have similar thoughts running through his head whether he's shy, not ready, or not interested. He just has to have some idea of where this was *supposed* to be heading. Link to comment
lady00 Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 I agree with PR as well...at most right now all you know is that you are going on date-like outings and that you are non-exclusive (because you haven't had the talk yet) but if it's bugging you (sounds like it is) at this point it makes sense to talk about it. My sense is he is not interested romantically. But I could be wrong of course. Maybe he just thinks he's found his new bff. Who knows...it might just save you a lot of trouble and worry to come out and ask. I really like the way PR phrased it...if you ask in that manner it doesn't sound strange at all. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 5, 2009 Author Share Posted September 5, 2009 You guys are right. Logically I know all of this. It's just getting the guts to do it. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 You guys are right. Logically I know all of this. It's just getting the guts to do it. Or bring it up in the context of meeting his parents "thanks again for inviting me to the game - I hope I made a good impression on your parents" - that should open the door to a more specific conversation because why would you care unless you assumed that you two were dating? Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 5, 2009 Author Share Posted September 5, 2009 Well I did say yesterday to him that I really liked his parents a lot. Unfortunately it just lead to a conversation about who he looks like. He didn't even say, oh yea they liked you too. I'm glad I have a busy weekend ahead to distract me from all this haha. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 8, 2009 Author Share Posted September 8, 2009 OK, so I didn't have the guts to ask him what's going on. Shocker, I know. But I did ask him again to come visit me, and he's going to! This weekend doesn't work out, but we're shooting for the weekend after. The only problem is he works till like 1 on Saturday and there's football Sunday and our team plays at 4, so it's kind of a late game for him to come and watch. So chances are he'll either come in earlier and leave in time for the game or stay for the game and come watch with me and my friends. Which could be a bit awkward because there's a good chance this guy will be there that I had a short-lived "thing" with...the one who I'm friends with his sister. I just saw him for the first time since February over the weekend and it was a little awkward, but overall OK. He's seeing someone, which stings a little but what can you do. I have to deal with him a lot over the next year because we're both in his sister's wedding. Link to comment
lady00 Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 Will you have alone time in private? Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted September 8, 2009 Author Share Posted September 8, 2009 I hope, depends on how the plans go. If he does stay for the later game, I suggested that we go to the exhibit of the football team at the historical society here before the game. If he comes in earlier, it'd just be the two of us. I already make tentative plans for the game, so that's why I said he'd come watch with us. Link to comment
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