THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[Kuala]

Day 44..

[CherrySpoon]

Day 6.

 

Thinking a lot about myself today, and the improvements I need to make. It's hard to believe how things go south... the road to hell is paved with good intentions, I guess. Spent some time on FB, and even though I didn't look at her profile, it triggered thoughts of her(she was on it 24/7). I miss her daughter and her family, and the friends I made with her inner circle. I feel more loss today than heartbreak.

[3Tears]

Day 26

 

Chill sunday, rest day too and tomorrow is another rest day, I want to be 100% in energy for tuesday to kill my workout. I went out today to get some fresh air, I stumbled accross my ex mother in law... I didn't know what the hell to do lmao I just smiled and waved at her and she did the same...

 

I really can't believe my ex hasn't contacted me, not even breadcrumbs... thats crazy, after how close we were. Its about to be a month soon without ANY type of contact, no texts, calls, emails, no snooping, no nothing... I never thought I could make it this far and I never thought she could be this cold. I'm starting to think if I want to even contact her when I pass the month mark, I really don't know...

[brody17]

Day 39 today, woke up for the first time yesterday no thinking about her. It's progress, however thought about her this morning. know I'll have good days and bad days so its not a problem. I'm willing to put in the effort. I'm a little upset that after 5 years of us being together and 7 years of knowing her, this is it. She's not messaged or hasn't done anything. It's not fair, but it's life and the sooner I learn that, the better.

[deadmareish]

I'm weak. I saw him on Thursday. He messed with me, as he always does. He took me out for dinner, slept with me and stayed the night in my bed with me. I asked him the next day if it all meant he was ready to try again, he said it meant nothing.

Spent the weekend out, drank my sorrows away. Thought I'd start no contact again today for a new week and all that. 100% NC now, no semi 'I have a friend excuse'

 

I feel like I can do it, after all it was always him to break the NC first.

 

I feel down and out. I feel hopless. I feel like i'll never be happy again without him.

But this is for the best.

 

Day one.

[the dude91]

Day 41

 

Can't believe I made it this far. This is the longest time by far that my ex and I haven't talked in over 5 years. But oh well, that chapter is done and over with. But even still, she's been heavy on my mind lately. I think it's because I've starting working a bit more directly with one of her best friends now so I'm getting memories and reminders pretty often now though I try to keep the subject of the ex off limits. But even still, tidbits of information leaks out and it makes me feel a bit bad for the ex, it seems like whenever we break up her life takes a turn for the worse. But oh well I suppose, she's no longer my problem and I have to keep reminding myself of that. But at least now I know for sure I'll make my 90 days of NC, hopefully by then I'll feel much better.

[onelifeonelove]

Day 4

 

What a rollercoaster.. I can feel absolutely happy one second, but absolutely the next. Sometimes I think it's best for the breakup. Other times, I miss her company and I miss her love. It hurts to know she's talking to another guy, but I keep trying not to worry. It has been a week since break up and every night, I'd wake up sweating and drooling and have this sinking feeling, that I no longer am with her..

 

Since Day 2 of NC though, I've dreamed of her less. It used to be constantly about her, now it's random things. Hope this is a good sign for better things to come.

 

I skipped a week of school due to severe depression. But today I am going, I am gonna meet new people, and I am gonna so my homework and focus on myself. I might sign up for the gym if I have time. But overall, hope it gets easier..

 

I miss her so much.

[ezra]

Day 24

 

Still miss him like crazy, I wake up at night and think about him. Yesterday I broke down and cried in a public place. So embarrassing. I think I'm starting to feel the punch. We won't ever, ever get back together.

[CherrySpoon]

Day 7

 

Slept a little better than usual last night, but woke up feeling the devastation. However, I refused to dwell on it and immediately did some things for myself. Felt better right away. Still... In the back of my mind it feels like I'm doing all of this for HER. And that she is going to come to her senses one of these days... Maybe she will. Maybe she won't. Either way, I need to get back to where I was before we met. I was very excited about my future, and my confidence was sky high! I let the relationship get me off my focus, and I have no doubt that is the main reason behind all the little mistakes I made that eventually caused her to leave. I'll get back on track. I have to. Overall, the best day so far. I still think about her almost constantly, but it's not getting me down. It gives me hope in a strange way. She reminds me of what I'm capable of.

[3Tears]

Day 27

 

Getting everything done for tomorrow... I feel so emotionally drained, I hate this.

[JA0371]

Day 9....

[brody17]

Day 40 today, feels like a bit of a checkpoint. I'm glad I'm here though, proud at the same time too!

[deadmareish]

I'm gunna bump this up to day 3 as i realised i havent had any contact with the ex since sunday.

 

My ex loves classic horrors and i watched Psycho last night. Wanted to tell him about it.

I have no real urges to contact him, however every time i logg into Facebook i check with a little hope to see if i have an unread message from him.

 

Can't wait for the feelings to be gone. They just keep dragging me down. I always feel sad.

[rainbowbunny]

Day 5

Its been 2 weeks today since he broke it off with me during a small fight. I still cry every day, in fact I'm crying now...I can actually eat a little now but it's still hard for me. Same with sleeping. He's been posting a ton on snapchat and actually posted on Facebook. He only does stuff like that when we break up. I feel like he does it on purpose because he knows I'm looking. Maybe I'm delusional. I'm not going to delete him off of those things, I'm not ready.

 

When this break up happened I didn't think much of it. We are on and off again and this fight was especially meaningless so I thought he'd be over it in a couple days. Nope.

 

It feels like he hates me. Before I started no contact I was a moron and told him I wanted to kill myself because I was in so much pain. He hasn't texted me at all to check up on me. He just doesn't care anymore...I guess I brought more struggle to his life than happiness.

 

I want to text him so bad.

[Hi Its Me]

Day 5

 

Been feeling great since the latest (and last) overdose of craziness from her. Made new friends and I am so focused on improving my life in all aspects. I guess now that the possibility of ever getting back together is out of my head, one new thing has really started to creep in.. Feeling lonely. Not in the sense of having no friends or not knowing what to do after work or on weekends. Been keeping myself very busy. And it's not even lack of attention from females as I am going on dates, although I am trying hard to not go all the way and its been 2 weeks since I've slept with someone..

 

I guess I miss the closeness of having someone to share my life with. To not only be attracted to someone and spend a good time with, as that's not an issue. I miss caring for someone and for her to care about me. And to make memories which will last, not be forgotten within a week. Difficult to explain but I miss the feeling you get when you're in a loving relationship.

[ezra]

Day 25

 

I feel my mind wandering, always. I miss him. But I'm not going to take him back, ever.

[JA0371]

Day 10 !!!

[deadmareish]

I give up.

[rainbowbunny]

Day 6

Just kind of surprised that he hasn't sent me a single text. Wondering how that works. ..how can you love someone but have no desire to check up on them and make sure they're ok? Not texting him has been harder and easier at the same time. I'm losing hope mostly but sometimes I get a big rush of "maybe it'll work out. " I just really miss him.

[t1lersm0m1]

Day 84! Go me! In 6 days it will be day 90! Day 84 to a wonderful, strong, healthy Leigh.

[hermione]

Day 0, ugh. Broken up for a month. I've been trying so hard to say only what was necessary and when. A week post-BU I called to see where things are at and after followed one letter and two texts. I sent the last tonight, saying the rest of what I needed to say before letting him know I'll shut up and let him initiate.

 

I don't believe in this, honestly. I don't believe I will heal and I don't believe it will work to bring us back together - probably because I have control issues and I feel that the only way to fix things is to be in control of them. I've never been patient. But I love him and our relationship enough to try - and I respect myself enough to try to stop agonizing over something that may be months or even years - or an eternity - off.

 

Even in (if it counts as this) LC, I feel like I've made a lot of progress and I want to continue forwards together. But inside I know it will take more time. It just seems impossible to me to step away. I think about him every second.

[deadmareish]

Day one

 

This will be the final time I need to start over!

[brody17]

Day 42 today, it's been 7 weeks - hard to believe; I write this so in a few months, years I look back at it and realise that happiness is a mood and not a destination and that everything happens for a reason, however at the moment I can't feel happy; I need to feel the pain to appreciate the future. Everything I wanted in life love, camaraderie, freedom, are lost in the dust. I need to find myself, with this break up I've lost myself in the dust. My life is on auto-pilot, I wake up, go work, come home, go out, sleep, repeat. I used to be happy all the time, used to look at the positives in live and always found a reason to smile. I need to get back to that.

 

I miss her with everyday that goes by. I miss having some to call when I'm upset, I miss having someone to call when I'm happy. i feel alone and empty. It's been 42 days, it has got better, but i still feel sad which of course I'm allowed to.

[rainbowbunny]

Day 7

Last night was interesting. He posted a lot of stuff that is now deleted.

Fb post was something like "lost and confused. My life is so chaotic and crazy that I dont know what to do. Lost"

Then on snapchat "on the struggle bus tonight love u all"

Then on twitter "kinda angry at the world"

Its all deleted now. I can't help but feel that even if it's not totally about me, it may partially be. Like maybe our break up was just one more sucky thing going on.

Maybe I'm a bad person for it, but it's almost comforting to see him in some sort of pain instead of seeing him so happy and unaffected after the break up while I cry every day.

[t1lersm0m1]

Day 85. Since I only have 5 days to go to Day 90, I think I"ll begin counting daily again.

 

85 freeing days of focusing on me and my issues, and growing as a person. I've done so much in the nearly last three months. I've come a long wayQ