Rough sex the first time with a new partner?

[Censored]

I had a guy try this with me. After he slapped me accross the face, I slapped him back and walked out. How the heck did he know if I even liked that or not? Not cool.

 

 

[hers]

I had a guy try this with me. After he slapped me accross the face, I slapped him back and walked out. How the heck did he know if I even liked that or not? Not cool.

 

HOLY CRAP! Are you serious? WOW. This is the kind of thing I was talking about...what makes them think they can try that???

[anggrace]

^^yeah, pretty crazy huh? I wasn't expecting it.

[hers]

Good post. But what about in the first kiss?

 

First kiss is nice, good kiss, but then he grabs her hair from behind and pulls it. What then?

[servedcold]

Good post. But what about in the first kiss?

 

First kiss is nice, good kiss, but then he grabs her hair from behind and pulls it. What then?

 

Eh, if I did that, wouldn't expect too many -second- kisses

 

Kidding aside, it's really situational. If a woman jumped me on a first kiss and rammed her tongue down my throat, she might get some hair tuggin, normal first kisses, can't imagine many times when that would be appropriate or appreciated.

 

There is an extremely popular book about pickup artists out there called "The Game," where some of the pickup artists claim that women become more aroused when they are twisted back by the hair and bitten on the neck as a kind of "dominance" move, I recall something about lions, but been awhile since I read it. I am sure there are guys out there who read stuff like that and rush out to try it in a misguided fashion. Maybe there is a link here?

 

I had a GF once who always went on and on about wanting a "spontaneous" man, so after one night of too much spontaneous talk, when we went to bed, at the opportune moment, I rared back and smacked the heck out of her ass with my hand. She started to get pissed, I just looked at her and whispered the word "spontaneity". We ended up choked up laughing.

[amtjrtcet]

I definitely depends on the two people involved.....for example...my ex and I had a wonderful sex life, but it was more sensual and tender.....this other ex brought out the 'freak' in me, the sex was rough, passionate, and kinky...I loved it when he pulled my hair, spanked me, and choked me a little....But I couldn't see myself having rough sex like that with some of the men I've been involved in.

[ghost69]

i'm a bit of both. it depends on the connection usually. sometimes i'm in the mood to hurt a bit though and they some some booty slaps and grabs, hips grabbed hard, neck choked a bit, hair pulled.

[Catdancer]

I've had sex like this the first time. It's very erotic seeing a man so aroused that he loses control and just takes. He gets that feral look in his eyes. Mmm...great memory. But I like sex to be very primal and to the point where we lose control.

 

To some this may have been creepy. But I loved it when it happened with me.

[hers]

I've had sex like this the first time. It's very erotic seeing a man so aroused that he loses control and just takes. He gets that feral look in his eyes. Mmm...great memory. But I like sex to be very primal and to the point where we lose control.

 

To some this may have been creepy. But I loved it when it happened with me.

 

That's an interesting outlook. I hadn't looked at it as losing control and being turned on to that point. I had only seen it as not thinking at all what the partner likes and may want.

[DJG]

I would not start being dominant when you're having first time sex unless you know that your partner accepts that.Depends on a nature of your relationship aka reading between the lines, if prior chat did not happen.

[chocolates]

I think if you wan to be dominant, you need to be able to read her cues pretty quickly. You'll be able to tell pretty quickly. I just wouldnt go too extreme the first time, just test the waters.

 

Really i think its just easier to have some kind of vague discussion beforehand about this with her so you can see how she likes it.

 

Personally i got turned on just reading about it. Dominant man sex is a huge turn on for me, but i can imagine a lot of women not liking it.

 

I mean also there are DEGREES of dominance. Like i will only let a guy go so far, I dont like it to rough, and definitely no pain.