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stevty2889

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  1. I'm going through the same thing as you right now. Seems I go through the differant stages several times a day. It's been about a week since I last her from her. She was my best friend for 9 years as well, so I feel completely lost, because she was always the one I used to turn to when I was having problems. I feel sad, lonely, angry, and releaved all in one day. I was mostly going through the anger stage up until she IM'd me the other day, then everything started all over again. I was a complete mess the last conversation I had with her, and now she doesnt' even want to be friends anymore. I've been having the same problem with sleep as well, I fall asleep, dream about her, wake up, and then can't fall back asleep. I keep getting sick to my stomache and can't eat. I miss her horribly, but she said she wasn't happy in the relationship, so I am trying to let her go, I"d rather her be happy with some one else, then miserable with me. I still hope to be friends with her, since we've been through so much together, but now it seems I may have chased her away for good. All I can say is hang in there, it will be tough for a while, but things will get better with time. At least you know you aren't suffering alone.
  2. I've been taking walks to clear my head, and it helps a bit. I just really don't know what I want to do now, since all my plans were working on being with her. She's made it very clear she doesn't love me anymore, and doesn't want to be anything more than friends. I'm very shy so I don't have many friends, and never had much luck in the dating scene, but like usual, seems I have to start all over again, just don't know where I want to go, or what I want to do. The job I have isn't what I want to be doing for the rest of my life, so I never gave a second thought to quitting and moving to be with her. I just feel completely lost, with no direction, and no idea what to do. I just want to settle down, get married, and be able to raise my daughter, and thought that was going to happen, and now I have to start all over, when I've never been good at meeting people in the first place.
  3. She just doesnt seem to get the fact that I don't want to talk to her right now, she IM'd me again today. I guess I'll just have to ignore her from now on, because everytime she talks to me, I just end up feeling worse, and I'll never get through this that way. I've really lost all direction, and have no idea what to do with my life now.
  4. I really wish I could get her off my mind, we had almost everything in common, I cant' do anything without it reminding me of her. I don't really have any other close friends, she was the closest friend I had, or so I thought. I'm a very shy person, so I don't make friends easily. I wish there was SOMETHING I could do to get her off my mind, but nothing is. I'm so upset right now, I want to send her an e-mail saying I don't ever want to talk to her again. How can somebody that was supposed to be your friend for the last 9 years, act so cold hearted. Is she really that stupid, or does she just not care at all?!?!?!
  5. Well I just suffered a major setback. I should have just ignored her. She IM'd me today, I asked her how she was doing, said she was in bed with a migraine all week, she asked me how I was doing, said I was trying to survive one day at a time. Then she asked me if I had a new girlfriend yet, and when I said no, she actualy asked me why? I was like what the heck? Why do you think, I am heart broken thats why. It's like she doesn't even understand that she freakin broke my heart, or just doesnt' care. I shouldn't have answered her IM. I think she's already seeing somebody else, by the way she acted, but she didn't say it and I didn't want to ask. I need to just completely ignore her all together now, or I am gonna just go crazy. How can she be so heartless that she thinks we can just talk like friends, like nothing happened at all. I am gonna lose it!
  6. Even if he does change his mind, and tells you he wants to work it out, if there are unresolved issues, it will just bring back the problems. I wanted nothing more than for her to say she wanted me back, and wanted to make things work. She did, but then 4 days later, broke it off again, for all the same reasons, without ever giving us a chance to discuss them, or work on the problems. I got my heat broken all over again, I should have just kept up the no contact, but I won't make that mistake again, it's not worth letting her hurt me all over again. It hurts horribly, and I feel completely lost without her, but I know it will get better with time. Just keep on trying to keep yourself busy, and over time, you'll start to feel better. I am still having my ups and downs, but starting to feel a little better.
  7. I am going no contact without telling her. She's the one who broke up with me, twice in one month, if she wants to talk, she can initiate it, I'm not gonna play her silly games anymore.
  8. It's really tough, but it has to get better eventualy. I am trying to deal with a break up right now as well. She was my best friend for 9 years, and we had been in a long distance relationship for about a year. About a month ago, we had spent some time together, and everything seemed great, then a week later, she dumps me out of the blue. I found this website a day later, and took the advice of no contact. A week later, she says she's sorry and wants to get back together and try and work things out. Then 4 days later she dumped me again, saying I was too emotional, too affectionate, had low self esteem(which is true), and those were her main reasons for the breakup. I have been a mess, because I not only lost my one and only true love, but my best friend at the same time, and don't really have anyone else to turn to.
  9. I think you need to find a new lawyer. I know what you are going through. My ex-wife was abusive to me, suicidle, and mentaly unstable. My daughter got put in a foster home, while the divorce was going on. She wasn't being taken care of there as well. In the end, I had to sign away my rights, so that my parents could adopt her, and get her away from both my ex-wife and the foster home. It's been very difficlut for me, not being able to have custody of my daughter, but I know it was best for her. You need to keep fighting, and get your kids away from you ex-wife. I really can't understand why the courts seem to side with the woman, even if she is unstable and abusive, but it seems to happen anyway.
  10. I know how you feel, I'm in a simlar situation. I've been in a long distance relationship for just over a year. 2 weeks ago, she told me she just wanted to be friends. I stopped talking to her, then a week later, she says she's sorry, and wanted to work things out. Everything seemed to be going fine, then 4 days later, she goes back to just wanting to be friends. I am completely in love with her, and she has also been my best friend for the last 9 years. I don't really want to lose her as a friend, but right now I just can't handle talking to her at all. We had so much in common, and enjoyed almost all the same things, so right now, doing anything remindes me of her. I want to be her friend again, but right now it just hurts way too much. I think the best thing for now would be no contact, in both of our situations.
  11. I hope that I'll still be able to be friends with her, but for now I don't want to talk to her at all. Seems like she can't make up her mind, and I don't need to keep going through this, so I'm gonna stick to NC. It's so hard to not think about her, we had so much in common, and always had a good time when we got to spend time together. I mean we had practicly all the same hobbies and interests, I couldn't even watch the football games on TV yesterday, because the last thing we did together was go to a football game. I just need to start finding things to do, to keep me occupied, otherwise I'll just sit around, thinking about her non stop, and lose my mind.
  12. I know how you feel. My girlfiend of a year, and best friend of the last 9 years, broke up with me 3 weeks ago. Then a week later, she says she's sorry, wants to work things out, and wants to continue our relationship. Then a few days ago, she says she just wants to be friends. She can't even have the decency to call, or talk to me about it, just sends me an e-mail. I was really heart broken 3 weeks ago, then she gets my hopes up, acts like everything is fine, the dumps me all over again. I blamed myself at first, but she seems to be the one having a problem, and can't make up her mind. We have been in a long distance relationship, and I am finally at the point where I was able to move there to be with her, and now she's pulling all this crap on me. I don't know that this helps to reasure you in any way, but at least you know you aren't the only one.
  13. Well so much for that, not even a week later, she goes back to the whole lets just be friends thing. I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, I was making all my plans to move there to be with her, but it's obvious she doesn't want to be anything more than friends. I am really lost now, I don't know what I am gonna do. I don't want to stay here, but I don't want to move there anymore. She was my best friend for 10 years, but how am I supposed to be her friend, when I have these feelings for her, and she just dumps me like a piece of garbage.
  14. Well I finally got to actualy have a conversation with her rather than the e-mail back and forth thing. I feel so much better now. I told her about how I felt last week, we talked about my working on moving there. I think I know why she was acting like she did too. I guess she thought I wasn't as serious about getting married as she was, because I hadn't proposed to her yet. I explained to her that I hadn't done so, because I wanted to wait until my divorce was finalized, and I couldn't afford to get her a ring yet. She seemed to understand, and I think we both feel a lot better now, I know for sure that I do.
  15. I know how you feel. I have been in a long distance relationship for just under a year, with a girl who has also been my best friend for the last 10 years. About 5 months ago, she told me she couldn't handle the long distance relationship anymore, wanted to be friends, and broke things off. 1 week later she was seeing another guy. That lasted a week, and she got back together with me. It hurt me, but I tried to be understanding. Then after that everything seemed to be going good again. We saw eachother 3 weeks ago, and everything seemed fine. Then I get the same e-mail basically, she wanted to break things off, can't handle the distance, has been waiting for me for almost a year, and can't really deal with it anymore. This is one month before my contract is up, so I can move there. I had been applying for jobs when I got that e-mail. We sent a few more e-mails back and forth, and then 1 week ago, she said she didn't want a relationship with me, and maybe we could be friends if I moved there. That broke my heart. So I don't talk to her at all for a week, and then sent her an e-mail yesterday morning, saying I was sorry for how I acted, and that I would rather have her as a friend, than not have her in my life at all. She sends an e-mail back, saying she was sorry for how she acted, and that she misses me, and hopes we can work things out. I send her another one back, saying I was happy to hear from her, I accept her appology, hope she accepts mine, and that I am glad we can work things out. I also told her I had sent her a letter a few days earlier. So it looked like things were going to get better. But then this morning..I get a 1 line e-mail back saying Guess you had the wrong address. I really don't get it, not sure how to take that. We usualy talk through e-mail, but I told her I think we need to have a real time conversation, that I am still hurting, and hope she can find the time to talk to me. I was a real mess over the last week. I really love her, and want to work things out, but I'm afraid she is just going to hurt me again. Not sure if this really helps you, but at least you know you aren't the only one going through it.
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