comfortably_nmb21

As i've posted before, my parents are currently separated... My mother moved to California and my father is still living here in Montana. I feel like i have to choose sides. I'm closer with my mother so we talk every day and i seem to be the one she vents to about my father...however, i love my father dearly and i feel awful that he's living alone.. How do i stay neutral and show my father i'm not choosing sides? We don't really have a close relationship.. he doesn't like talking on the phone, doesn't use email and he's always working when i try to go visit him.

I honestly have no idea what kind of a lover i am. I don't just lay there, but i'm not overly aggressive either. I'm very open to experiments in the bedroom. I've talked to him several times about it and his reasoning is "you weren't here" But you know.. i was a phone call away... i would have watched it with him.. all he had to do was tell me he was horny and i would have been, pardon the pun, all over it.

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years now. He's never been a touchy feely type guy. I knew this when i got into the relationship with him.. but that's another story.. About a year into our relationship i found out that while i was at work he was downloading porn and jacking off to it.. then when i was in the mood he'd feed me a line about how he wasn't in the mood or how he was tired. I felt totally rejected just well.. not good enough. I told him if i ever found how he did that again, i'd leave him.. well.. about 6 months after that i found out it was happening again(i know because we'd go through "dry spells".. no sex or anything for like 3 weeks at a time) so i left him for a day.. and told him i really truly would leave him the next time. I recently found out it was happening AGAIN.. now.. i don't have anything against porn.. i dig it actually. I just feel like i'm not enough forhim.. like i dont' satisfy his needs and stuff like that. ANy guys out there who can give me some insight into why he's doing this? And all you girls out there.. what would you do? Would you leave him? I'm tired of feeling not good enough in this department, but i love so many things about him i just can't imagine life without him.

I am 21 years old, and my parents are recently separated. I feel like my world is falling apart. I have based my whole idea of love and what a relationship should be like.. on my parents relationship, only to find out the past 10 or so years have been a complete charade. My mother loves my father dearly, she says she doesn't want to divorce him. They're currently living thousands of miles from one another and barely speaking. Like I said, i've admired my parents relationship since i was a little girl. I wanted to find a guy like my father, and live happily ever after like i thought my parents would.. but now.. how do i know what real love looks like? Pure unconditional love. Does all love fizzle in the end? How do i get through this and not let it effect my relationship with my boyfriend?

I totally understand how you're feeling. It took me years to tell my family that i was depressed. My dad and my boyfriend think it's something i'll grow out of or get over. My mom totally understands because she's the same as me. As for you not doing somethign about it.. i think you're wrong. You have done somethign about it.. you've told your family you think you have a problem and that's a big step in the right direction. There are so many different directions you can take from here.