surething

Oh, we haven't talked online yet, just on the phone. I don't like online that much either. I was just worried that it would turn into a friendship somehow. Like you were saying, it could ruin the spark of being with someone new. So, what if i don't call her tonight. I don't want her to think i don't want to talk to her or that i don't like her, you know? Would she think that? She said she will see me this weekend, so i'm guessing that is when we will go out.

Here's the story - I met this girl at a party, a friend hooked us up. I called her and we hit it off, the next day i asked her out and she said yes. A few days later, she and her friend come to my house to hang out. It went really well, at the end of the night she kissed me on the cheek. She told our friend she likes me a lot and wants me to ask her out on a real date. I did. We haven't made an actual date yet, but she said yes. The first time i called her was last Wednesday, 6 days ago. We talked for over an hour and it was awesome. Since then, we've talked on the phone almost every night. We really like each other a lot. She really seems to like talking to me, she even asked for my screen name so we can talk on-line. I love talking to her. Its never boring and there's always something to say. Its really natural. Here's where i'm unsure. Is it okay to be talking to her every night at this point? Does it ruin anything in some way? We haven't had a real date yet, and we've only met twice. Is it normal to be talking to her a lot? Is this common? I don't know how this works because i've never gone out with a girl i didn't already know in some way. Thanks for any input!

Its fine. She came with her friend over the weekend. I think she did that because we have only met once briefly, so it was kind of like an icebreaker, like a chance to be around each other without being on a "date." It turned out really great. At the end of the night, she kissed me on the cheek. Pretty good considering we've only met once. Her friend told me she really likes me and wants me to ask her out, so i did and she said of course. Thats where i'm at now.

Okay, thanks. I just don't want her to think that i dont like her or something. I don't know if she's expecting me to or not. The first time we talked was for over an hour, and last night was really long too.

I don't know, just to talk? Or do i just wait until we make plans? I think she said we will do something tomorrow night. So maybe i'm supposed to call tonight and set it up? I've tried to ask our friend but i can't get a hold of her.

I'm in college. She's 18 and in high school. I asked her out last night. She said yes, but she's busy with school for the next few days, so she said i can hang out with her and our friend this weekend. Am i supposed to call her again tonight? We've talked twice.

I'm 19. I've only asked out a couple of girls before. And the girls i went out with before weren't really official or anything, we would just kind of hang out. So i can ask her out to eat, and set a date/time, but i don't need the place yet right? That sounds good. Does it matter if its dinner? And should i plan anything for afterwards?

Do i ask her out in general first, then tell her where? I can't think of anywhere to take her that would be good. It shouldn't be a huge deal right? Would something thats casual be good, like out to eat or something? I'm drawing a huge blank because i'm really excited she said she likes me.

I met this girl at a party, then a friend told her i am interested and gave me her number. We talked last night and we hit it off. Today, she told our friend that she likes me a lot and said she would go out with me if i asked. How do i ask her out? My friend said "ask her if she would go out with you." Am i making a date here? Or am i just saying "would you like to go out with me sometime?" like in general? I'm calling her later tonight so i need some advice asap! I know she will say yes, but what do i say from there?

A friend just got me the number of a girl i met at a party. We basically only said hi to each other, so i don't know her at all. I'm supposed to call her later tonight and i have no idea what we are supposed to talk about. How does this work? I've never done this before and i'm not great with conversation to begin with. Her friend told me not to ask her out. I don't know what to say to this girl. Any pointers please? Thanks.

My advice to all out there is be careful on-line! You never know what people might be looking for or what they would do. Be clear if you meet someone.

Sorry for not explaining what i meant by "casually implied." When she said i could date her friend, i wasn't like "Oh my god! Alright! Please set us up! I really want you to!" I was more laid back because i really didn't expect it. Bare with me, like i said, i've never been in that situation before. I told her she sounds hot and sounded interested, i forget exactly what i said. She basically described her friend and asked if i liked that type of girl. I said i do. Then after a while, the topic changed and i couldn't do anything. Thanks for all the pointers. But i'm not at the point of meeting her yet. If i get that far, then i'll worry about it. I'm still trying to bring it up to my friend, and hopefully she'll set us up. Do girls really like it when guys say those things? I have no problem with confidence, i'm just a little nervous sometimes because i haven't gone out with that many girls. I always try to act confidently. In this situation i don't have a reason to be nervous, do i?

I was talking with a friend of mine about girls in general. I jokingly told her to find me someone. She knows i want to date someone. Then she brought up her best friend and said "ooh you could date her!" and described her to me, wanting to know if i liked that type of girl. She's supposedly really good looking and everything. I casually implied i was interested. I usually don't have much luck with girls, so i wasn't really expecting this and i didn't know what to say. It wasn't official or anything. We talked about it for a couple of minutes but then the subject changed and i couldn't bring it up again. Now I wish i did. I hope she didn't get the impression i wasn't interested. I know this is a dumb thing to ask for advice on, but how do i ask my friend to set us up? I don't want it to sound weird or obvious, do you know what i mean? I'm finding it hard for some reason. I don't want to sound desperate or anything, even though we're good friends and she knows me well. Basically i don't want to mess up or sound like an idiot, and i don't want to blow my chance. We talked about this two days ago. So would it be too soon to call her and bring it up? How do i go about this? I've never been set up before. Thanks a lot!

UPDATE She took a test and it said she wasn't pregnant. She's really happy. It says its 99% accurate. But could she really be pregnant? I mean, should she worry?

Thanks everyone, i feel a little better now. I'm just not used to feeling this way. I've always kept everything inside because i try to think it'll get better. The thing is, it never does. I find it hard to get into social groups when i feel this way. I usually come out of these periods of feeling down, but this one's not as easy. I hate knowing "one day" things will get better and all of that. I've waited this long and it hasn't changed, its just gotten worse. Why should things be different in my future? Why do most people get to enjoy their lives NOW? I've always heard nice guys finish last, and i just realized i'm living it. And "one day girls will want someone who's nice..." Why do i have to wait? Its not fair that other people get everything and i can't even get anything close.

I'm not planning to kill myself, but lately it doesn't sound as crazy as it used to. I can't get anything going in my life, so a lot of times i think dying would make it less painful. I don't have a horrible life. My family isn't great, but there's families out there that are much worse. I've lived my whole life thinking i have a great family, but lately i'm seeing how things really are and i don't care about anything anymore. They won't let me grow up, yet they always criticize me for not being as mature as i should be. I constantly fight with my brother and i haven't spoken to him in over a month, and its always my fault. I'm not much of anything to my dad - we have no relationship at all. My mom is okay, but she just doesn't understand anything and i can't talk to her. I feel like a stranger in my own family. I'm usually by myself in the house, like i don't exist. And this is the only place i have to go. I'm alone and i'm scared. I don't have too many friends. I don't really hang out with anyone. Occasionally i talk to "friends" but not everyday. They're always busy with their real friends, and that makes me feel ten times worse. It hurts so bad i've cried countless times. Everyday i asked a friend to hang out during the summer. She'd always say we should, but never did. One night in particular she said she was too busy to talk to me because she was making plans to hang out with some other guy, like i didn't exist. My whole life has been this way, ever since i was 6 or 7. No one ever let me be a part of anything. The thing is i don't know why. It feels like i'm excluded from life in general to this day. I hate people saying i'm their friend when i never see them or do anything but talk every few weeks. I don't know why people don't like me enough to want me around. They used to like me at school but NEVER cared to see me outside and i have no clue as to why. Now i'm in college and i hate it. Everyday i'm reminded of the fact that i'm alone. Walking into school i see guys with their girlfriends, people having fun and talking with their friends... while i'm by myself, and everyone around just ignores me. I can't explain how horrible that makes me feel. Everyone else has what i want, and they get it so easily! I've never been happy. I've never had anyone to be with - ever. I always told myself i was happy and things are looking up, but thats all a joke and it took me this long to see it. I constantly hope things will get better, but i just end up hurting myself. I can't get a girlfriend for the life of me. The one person i care about and i might be in love with, has a boyfriend. She likes me too but i blew it by not asking her out. I think about that all the time and it makes me so angry because its my fault. I ruin every chance i have with anything. Every single girl i've met has turned out this way. Girls have liked me, one even asked ME out, but i always mess it up. This girl now is the best thing in my life, yet i'm just a friend, which is what every girl sees me as. I know i'm not bad looking. My family is wealthy and i have a lot to offer - yet no girls show interest in me. No one (with the exception of this girl) notices me. And she gave up on me to be with an unactractive younger guy. She never gave me a chance and just found someone else, like i'm nothing. The exact same thing happened with another girl soon after. I could've gone out with her, but she just ignored me and found someone else on purpose for whatever reason. I feel like a loser. I lose at everything and can't take it much longer if things don't change. I hate being left out. And i've tried, tried so hard to be accepted, tried hard to make friends but it always turns out the same way. I'm still alone and i can't change it. I'm affraid i'll be alone my whole life. How am i going to find someone to marry one day when i can't even get a date with a girl who likes me?? I know i probably sound like i'm whining or feeling sorry for myself, but i really need help. It hurts really bad. All of my friends have someone to be with, and i'm by myself while they're out having fun. Killing myself would put an end to the constant failure i endure everyday. Whats the point of living when in the 19 years i've been around, nothing has changed? Nothing gets better and i end up losing whatever little hope i had. It'd be dumb to keep living a life that isn't worth anything. I can't stand it anymore. I'd literally give anything to have things go right for a change, just for a day. I just want to be with this girl, but that probably will never happen. She means the world to me. But right now i'd take anyone at all. Thanks for listening, i know its long. I've never told anyone about this stuff so its not easy for me, i hope i wrote it clearly.

That makes me feel a lot better, thanks. I think she's learning exactly what you said about seeing abortion differently. I just get confused and mad sometimes, which i know isn't right of me and i'll try to be patient. I've already waited this long. I talked to her last night and her boyfriend got mad at her again because i called. I hope she sees how he really is. If in fact she is pregnant (and she probably is) she asked me to take her to get an abortion, and of course i said i would. I'm also helping her take a pregnancy test because she's really scared. I just hope things work out one day like you say. I think you're right because she really does seem to appreciate everything very much. Thanks

Thanks everyone. I'll try to put my feelings towards her aside for now. But the thing about abortion - i know her pretty well. She might be messed up because she is anti-abortion, and i mean really against it. She spoke out against it in class all the time. Its really ironic how things turned out not even a year later! But maybe the relief would make her better like you said. Its weird, kinda like its my baby because i'm going through it with her. And even if she had a kid i would still want to be with her and there for her. It hasn't scared me away or made me see her differently.

Thanks for the reply and you make a lot of good points, not harsh at all. A reality check is actually what i need because i can't get a good view on things myself. She said she can't tell her boyfriend about the pregnancy and she's choosing abortion, which she won't tell anyone about either. The fact that she wants to go this route is another long story. But why wouldn't she be likely to fall in love with me because of that? I thought that since we're getting closer and going through a tramatic experience together, she might see me as more than a friend. Especially if she doesn't stay with her boyfriend, but thats not close to happening yet. I'm just speculating, thats all. Thanks a lot.

Thanks man. You're right and you made the whole thing clearer for me. I guess i am kinda selfish and i didn't realize it until you mentioned it. Sometimes i just need a slap in the face to get me thinking straight. I know the 1 year age gap isn't huge, but i hear girls usually go for older guys, which is one of the things she liked about me when we met. I guess i'm jealous of the fact she chose a younger guy over me. Will she really see how much i care and want to be with me? I mean, will being there for her help help our chances of being together? And i know a lot of its in the past, but the past is what brought me to where i am now. And where i am right now sucks. Thats what bothers me, but i'll try to forget about it from now on. Thanks.

This is somewhat long, so thanks for reading if you do. I don't know where to start. It all started last year when i met this girl. I'm jealous of her boyfriend. But i'm not "jealous" of him, just the fact that he got the girl that i really like. I'm also really angry that she started dating him when she liked me and knew i liked her. Just thinking about this makes me rage. She apparently wanted me to ask her out, but i didn't know. So what does she do? She goes out and finds some 15 year old child (no offense to anyone here) and is still dating him to this day...9 months later. She's 17 now, he's 16. We're just friends now. I just can't believe a girl would go for a younger guy! He's tiny! And he's really, really immature. I'm 19 and she knows she likes me, but she's too involved with this kid. And she's been having a lot of problems with him. She never gave me a chance and that makes me feel really bad about myself. I can't get over it. The story gets worse... Now she might be pregnant with his kid, and i'm helping her deal with it. She decided she can't have the child and turned to me. She hasn't told anyone else and she won't - not even her boyfriend. We've gotten really close lately. I've liked her for over a year, and i think i'm falling for her. I've never been closer to anyone in my life. She feels the same and said she trusts me more than anyone else. It just angers me to know that not only does she have a boyfriend, but he got her pregnant, on top of many other bad things he's done to her. I can't take feeling this way! That should be ME she's with. None of this would've happened if she made a move and did something to show she likes me. We're perfect together and i can't do anything! We have something really special and i can't be more than a friend right now. I'm hoping she'll dump him, but i don't know. I can't imagine her not feeling something for me because of how close we've gotten, and because i'm helping her do something extremely serious. A while ago she said she wants to be with me but its too late, and stuff like that. I just hate feeling so jealous, so helpless. I think about her all the time. Please don't flame me for wanting a girl who's taken. She wasn't when we met and i can't help how i feel about her. I feel like a jerk but i know i'm right, and she does too. Now, i have to bail her out and help her stay with him once again. I know i have to be a friend to her and i want to be. But i'll always want more with her and i don't know what to do. I can't stop thinking about how things could've been and i still hope that one day soon i'll be with her. Thank you for reading

I think she said her period is always on time. She even knows the exact days and its never been late. 2 months does seem too long to be stress-related. Is it okay to just take a home pregnancy test? She's going to take one but maybe a doctor would be better, i dont' know. Thanks everyone.

A few days ago, my friend (who i posted about before and have feelings for) confided in me said she might pregnant. She's 17. Here's the story - she's over 2 months late, which is around the time she had sex with her boyfriend. Apparently the condom fell off. She hasn't taken a pregnancy test yet, but i'm going to help her and make her take it very soon. I've heard that stress and nerves can delay a womans period. So, could worrying about being pregnant cause her to miss it? Or does it sound like she's pregnant for sure? I know we won't know until she takes the test, but i was just curious. I can try to give more info if needed. I'm sure i'll be posting about this situation again very soon. Thanks.

Okay thanks guys, but if i ask her "do you wanna hang out?", how would she know that i'm interested in being more than friends? Or should i ask "do you wanna go out sometime?" (of course i would try to say something better than that) I want her to know i'm interested. Which is better? I was thinking of asking her out to eat somewhere, nothing special, just to spend time together. She's really busy so i don't know when she can. We don't go to the same school anymore, which is another reason i don't see her as much as i used to. So i can't ask her to dances or anything. But she lives really close to me so its not a big problem. (we both can drive) I'm just affraid she sees me as only a friend.

Well i've decided to ask this girl out. I've known her about 6 months. I wimped out and never asked her out, then she found someone else. But she definitely knew i liked her. They were together for a few months and broke up about a month ago. We aren't close friends, i don't talk to her as often anymore. We used to talk everyday but now she's busy with school. Last weekend we talked online and on the phone for a while. I know she likes me, but i'm not sure if she'd want to go out with me. I think it could go either way. We have a ton in common and always have fun together. She's told me and my friends that i'm really funny and things like that. Should i ask her out? How do i go about asking her? Would it be wrong? I don't know what to expect from her because we've already known each other for a while. I'm hesitant for some reason. Its also hard for me to find a time to ask her because we don't talk as much as we used to. So would it be weird if i just called her one day and asked her out? I don't know what to do. What do you think?