Kovsal Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Me and my manager went on our first date last week we both had a great time holding hands laughing and the rest. Afterwards we talked on the phone for hours everynight everyday. Went on our second date thursday night turned out to be a horrible night and it was my fault. she left as soon as we got to the destination. I worked with her friday morning i aplogized to her sincerely and she said it was ok. But since friday shes been ignoring my calls and texts. Im asking her tell me how shes feeling but shes ignoring me. I work all day with her monday. What should i do? Link to comment
PuffyParakee Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 You're not leaving enough important details. Why did she leave once you arrived at the second date? What went wrong? Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Went on our second date thursday night turned out to be a horrible night and it was my fault. Whadja do? Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 8, 2019 Author Share Posted June 8, 2019 I accidently ordered a shared lyft ride so we sat seperated and when we got to the kava bar she immediately wanted to go home. Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 8, 2019 Author Share Posted June 8, 2019 Plus i was a little drunk Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 8, 2019 Author Share Posted June 8, 2019 I lost my card so i had someone else call us a lyft waited a half hour and i findout its a shared ride. Link to comment
SGH Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 It does sound like you really messed up on that second date. Attraction is fickle and fleeting in its early stages. I would leave her alone and return to the professional relationship that you had. If she wants to see you again, I'm sure she knows you are interested at this point, and the ball is really in her court. Considering she is your boss, you really need to tread extra carefully here. Seeing this woman is not worth losing your job over. Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 You got drunk BEFORE you picked her up? If you did, that would turn me off too. However; Ignoring your texts when you work together is a tad ridiculous. She should answer, get things over with before work Monday and then tell you to keep it professional at work if she chooses not to go out with you again. Don't text her again though. Once is enough, twice is to make sure she got it, after that it's overkill and annoying. Link to comment
PuffyParakee Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Yeah. This does sound bad. Never get drunk before or during a date. That's a turn off. It seems like you being inebriated set the stage for the disastrous night. How many times have you tried to text/call her? Don't try to contact her anymore. Leave her be, however, If I was in her shoes, I'd want to smooth things over before the work day, to prevent any awkwardness. Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 8, 2019 Author Share Posted June 8, 2019 Do u think i have any chance of reconciliation? I open the store with her monday morning so im pretty much alone with her for an a few hours Link to comment
boltnrun Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Why on earth did you decide to get drunk before your date? Did you think being drunk would make you "smoother" or less nervous or something? Link to comment
goddess Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 IMO, you've made two mistakes: getting drunk and dating your manager. Really? That's playing with fire, especially if it doesn't work out. As you can see, now it's uncomfortable and awkward. I guess Monday will give you both a chance to talk. Reconciliation? Up to her. The ball is in her court. But, I think you should both clear the air. Link to comment
PuffyParakee Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Do u think i have any chance of reconciliation? I open the store with her monday morning so im pretty much alone with her for an a few hours I dunno. I do think if she wanted to reconcile she'd at least return your phone calls, however, maybe she knows she will see you on Monday, & wants to smooth things over then. Link to comment
Cherylyn Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Getting drunk before a date is a permanent deal breaker. It's no wonder she's ignoring your calls and texts. You screwed up royally! Since you work together, remain professional, well-mannered, treat her and everyone with respect and carry on. You can't undo the past. Don't pursue and grovel. You need to understand human nature which is universal. Once people discover what you're capable of, observe an unsavory side to your character, poor choices, poor decisions and / or on the receiving end of your disrespect or rudeness, in their minds, they're already moving on. Sure, they can remain civil and peaceful but they don't want you in their lives anymore. People generally don't wish to risk repeated negative experiences, hurt or pain. They're done. They feel safer and protected without you. Most people whom I know including myself are this way. Once trust is dead, all relationships or friendships are dead. It's over. People forgive but they never forget. Forgive means to move on, not hold grudges nor wish ill will upon those who've wronged them. However, the word "forgive" is not to be confused with the word "forget." Forgetting is impossible. Because forgetting is impossible, the only recourse is to move forward by controlling and changing dynamics permanently and starting with a clean slate without you. Link to comment
SGH Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 Reconciliation? Kind of a strong word to use after only two dates. She's making it very clear she isn't interested and wants you to leave her alone. Respect that and stop messaging her. Be professional on Monday. Link to comment
Rose Mosse Posted June 8, 2019 Share Posted June 8, 2019 I'd take the hint from her and follow the advice from the other members. Let this go and stay professional at work. Don't pursue anything anymore. It won't look good and you're also in a precarious situation with her being your boss. Let this go. Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 9, 2019 Author Share Posted June 9, 2019 Shes hasnt blocked my number is it due to professional courtesy or is she contemplating me? Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 9, 2019 Author Share Posted June 9, 2019 If she hasnt blocked my number is it due to professional courtesy or do u think shes contemplating me? Link to comment
boltnrun Posted June 9, 2019 Share Posted June 9, 2019 If she hasnt blocked my number is it due to professional courtesy or do u think shes contemplating me? How do you know you're not blocked? You haven't continued to message her, have you? Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted June 9, 2019 Share Posted June 9, 2019 If you continue to text, you will make work weird. Grow up and leave it alone Link to comment
Kovsal Posted June 9, 2019 Author Share Posted June 9, 2019 No ididnt continue but when i had called it went through im just wondering if theres a chance i can save this due to the fact that she hasent blocked me. Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted June 9, 2019 Share Posted June 9, 2019 No ididnt continue but when i had called it went through im just wondering if theres a chance i can save this due to the fact that she hasent blocked me. You'll find that out on Monday. Link to comment
JA0371 Posted June 9, 2019 Share Posted June 9, 2019 I’m sorry, but you seem pretty relentless about this. You went out twice and are wondering if this can be “saved”?? There’s nothing to be saved...but I would recommend leaving her alone and saving your job! Link to comment
boltnrun Posted June 9, 2019 Share Posted June 9, 2019 She maybe wondering how to get you to stop messaging her without having to resort to blocking you, since she is your manager and has to supervise you at work. Stop messaging, do not give in to temptation to message her again to "explain" or "apologize", and be professional at work. Link to comment
SGH Posted June 9, 2019 Share Posted June 9, 2019 Wow dude. Just stop. You keep asking the same question and keep getting the same answers. This is not salvageable. She shouldn't have to block you for you to understand that. Let it go. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.