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Thread: Stranger?

  1. #1

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    Stranger?

    So its been 4 months and 2 weeks since my ex boyfriend broke up with me. I messaged him today about an important document I've been frantically searching for to see if by chance I might have left it at his place since that was where I last used it.

    Anyways the short is that he said no he hasn't I said ok thanks and then he said "how are you doing Stranger?"

    I didn't know that's what I had become in the space of 4 months so I just said I'm great but honestly it cut me inside. A few months ago he was telling me how much he loved and cared for me and today it was stranger.

    I honestly don't know how people can discard you like you meant nothing at all, like you had no value. I still do love and care for him and I was so hurt that is what he called me. It made me sorry I ever messaged to ask a question.

    Am I overthinking this or was that just his way of being polite/friendly?

    Thanks!

  2. #2
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    I think you are definitely way overthnking this. It's just a commonly used phrase. Are you interested in reconciliation perhaps? that would explain why it took on a much bigger meaning.

  3. #3

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    Yes I'd definitely love for us to get back together but when he said that it made me think that's how he really and truly sees me now

  4. #4
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    No, please don't think that literally. It's just a phrase honestly.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    You’re overthinking because you still have a lot of feelings for him, hopes connected to him.

    It is just an expression—and, generally speaking, a fond one. Just a way of lightly acknowledging that it’s been a while since you’ve spoken—with good reason, this being a breakup—and genuinely asking how you’re doing.

    That it’s thrown you like this is just evidence that you need some more time to heal.

  7. #6

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    Alright thank you

  8. #7
    Platinum Member browneyedgirl36's Avatar
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    I think it's just a figure of speech -- I don't think he meant it literally. It's more just saying "Hey, someone I haven't talked to in a bit!"

    I understand why it hurts, though. I remember thinking the worst thing ever would be the day I saw my ex somewhere and he didn't acknowledge me. Funny, it was actually ME who has seen HIM a few places and walked on by pretending I didn't (what a difference the passage of time makes!) When we have talked, I've been cordial (we work at the same place and run into each other every so often), but I don't feel anything anymore. Someday, you'll get there.

  9. #8
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    I don’t want to get your hopes up or anything (so I’m hesitant to post this...)... but anytime I have used the term “stranger”, I have done so affectionately - and maybe even in a flirty way.

    “Stranger” implies that you haven’t talked to them in a while and would like to talk to them more often. I would NEVER say that to someone I was unhappy to hear from and who I wanted to get rid of...

    To me, it was warm and affectionate and playful.

    To be honest, I think you are still hurting because I find your reaction kind of odd.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member LC8328's Avatar
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    I concur, that's a phrase I use when someone talks to me, who hasn't in a while. It's friendly. It means he hasn't spoken to you in some time.


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