I feel like such a failure

I just feel like I'm doing terribly in every way possible at the moment. Nothing seems to be going right.

I'm studying for a degree but I'm at a rubbish university (I didn't do well at A Level) and I don't really feel like I'm getting anywhere there even though I've done well in most of my modules so far. I missed an important class today for no real reason, I've never done that before. I just felt like I really couldn't bring myself to get up and get dressed and study and talk to people. I don't know why I feel this way. I just feel like I don't even care anymore. I can't understand why though because I've always been a diligent student and really cared about my grades and future career prospects. I'm so upset with myself for slipping up and not just trying to get on with it like I normally do. I feel guilty and ashamed and silly.

I've been trying since New Year to start getting a bit fitter and healthier (I'm not overweight, just want to start taking better care of myself) but I keep messing it up. I'm doing well with the exercise plan but I keep snacking and going wrong on the eating front. I just feel as though all I want to do is eat as of late.

I'm trying to make a scrap book of all of my favourite photos but it just looks rubbish and I can't seem to do anything well, not even something as simple as making a photo album. I've also been trying to learn to play the drums a bit but I'm not doing very well with it at all. I can't play a single song properly even though I've been playing for a number of months.

It was birthday last weekend and no one wished me happy birthday apart from my family and my partner. I have no friends, just the odd acquaintance.

I just feel like I'm not good at anything or worth anything and I feel like I'm not getting anywhere. I've been trying really hard to improve myself and my life for so long but I'm not getting anywhere. I've got no motivation any more. I just feel like there's no point and I want to give up.

What can I do? What's wrong with me? Why do I have to be this person?

I think everyone goes through phases like the one you are going though.

There isn't a simple answer. You just have to keep trying and be kind to yourself.

Remember that when you are feeling down it's really easy to frame everything as a part of your struggle. You are actively looking for the ways that you are failing and not looking at all at the way you are doing really well. I find that spending a bit of time each day thinking about or writing down, what you are grateful for, to be extremely useful in adjusting my point of view. Because everything you are dealing with? It's your point of view.

Don't worry about your university. Just do the best you can. 5-10 years after graduation, it will not matter where your degree is from, just how well you are doing at your job.

Happy belated birthday!! I recommend joining a club or organization at your university where you can make friends - pick something you are into - could be dance, a foreign language group, co-ed sports team, choir, whatever. Somewhere where you will go every week and see the same group of faces. Keep going and you'll become friends overtime.

Happy Birthday Drummergirl!

Hang in there, how long do you have left at uni? By the sounds of things maybe halfway through, so you got time for things to improve. Try the best you can with lectures etc, even if you don't feel like it. I had a few wobbly mmoments at uni where I was convinced I was going to throw in the towel and drop out. But I kept in there, got my degree and now I'd give anything to be back at that age!

Granted, I went to art school so my peers and I were on the backfoot with finding "successful" careers but a few of my classmates did short courses/masters afterwards and managed to move into other industries so nothing is set in stone!

I'm jealous that you're learning the drums. I've always wanted a go! Can you take a little break from that and come back to it afresh. I'm sure you have some rock idols - they didn't get there overnight! Practice! Back to the art school thing - I didn't feel that I could draw "properly" until my third year of a four year degree. And that was after going into a studio 5 days a week! You have to show up at the door first.