Final "I love you"

Why do guys do this. They treat you like push you far to the edge and when you finally have enough and decide to leave they want to do this. "Just tell me you love me one more time"

Now this guy is a piece of . Seriously. All he did was hurt me, didn't want me to leave even when I had nothing to offer. When he asked that I told him no. I can't tell you I love you because I don't anymore. He claimed that he cried and I was being crule and that he was going to kill himself. After a few hours I felt bad...I don't want him to kill himself I didn't want to be mean but he did not deserve my love and kinonessential and he knows it. So when I went to check on him he had another woman texting me telling me she's been there all along, I was stupid for giving him up, they just had sex, blah blah blah.

I was thinking to myself why? Why did he get so upset that I wouldn't tell him I loved him if he was already with someone else. It had literally been less than an hour. He said he was crying alone in the cold behind a gas station with no one. Why can't he just leave me the hell alone. She was so proud to have him when if I wanted him he would actually be mine. Its just stupid. Me saying "I love you" one more time wasn't going to stop him from doing drugs, ing other men and women and liein. What the hell did he want from me. Why can't people just break up with someone and leave them alone and do what they want like normal ing humans. When I asked why he stayed that the hurt I feel from that woman texting me was the pain I deserved for not showing him mercy. When all I had to do was say I loved him one last time and everything would have been ok. Lol I don't feel pain at all. The only pain I feel from any of this is for giving my all to someone who disn't deserve it and he hurt me so many times I barely feel that anymore. This whole thing is ing stupid.

Why can't people just break up with someone and leave them alone and do what they want like normal ing humans.

^

That's their cross to bear, yours is to refuse to participate and do everything possible to avoid them. In short, you can't change their behaviour etc, but you have complete control over your reactions.

Some people like drama. You don’t have to engage.

Unfortunately it sounds like you were thriving on the drama too. The whole ' I love you so much if you leave I'll die' thing should have showed you it was time to walk away or at the very least gotten him help, instead when he goes with the story of being with another woman you get jealous.

I'm going to guess you two are pretty young?

This high drama pendulum stuff can really screw with your head if you continue to engage so as the others said please disengage.

Unfortunately it sounds like you were thriving on the drama too. The whole ' I love you so much if you leave I'll die' thing should have showed you it was time to walk away or at the very least gotten him help, instead when he goes with the story of being with another woman you get jealous.

 

I'm going to guess you two are pretty young?

 

This high drama pendulum stuff can really screw with your head if you continue to engage so as the others said please disengage.

No, I've tried for two years to get him help. It's like he wanted someone to care but he didn't want the actual help. As far as that girl I'm not jealous I already knew about her in fact I'm glad that happened so I don't feel guilty about not "helping" him anymore. Cause she's a drug dealer. She sell what he love. Our actual relationship ended months ago. Trying to "help" is what got me into this mess. I'm baffled to why he wouldn't leave me alone if he had everything he needed. It just don't make sense. Also I really just wanted an answer to that question. Guys would tell u they love you then do everything to hurt you, especially if you don't love them back. I really wanted to know why me not saying it back hurt him so bad.

No, I've tried for two years to get him help. It's like he wanted someone to care but he didn't want the actual help. As far as that girl I'm not jealous I already knew about her in fact I'm glad that happened so I don't feel guilty about not "helping" him anymore. Cause she's a drug dealer. She sell what he love. Our actual relationship ended months ago. Trying to "help" is what got me into this mess. I'm baffled to why he wouldn't leave me alone if he had everything he needed. It just don't make sense. Also I really just wanted an answer to that question. Guys would tell u they love you then do everything to hurt you, especially if you don't love them back. I really wanted to know why me not saying it back hurt him so bad.

I say this meaning absolutely no disrespect whatsoever, based on your posts I don't see where you took control of yourself in this situation nor removed yourself nor got him help. I don't see that in this post either. I see a possibly young girl, upset and hanging onto the pendulum swings of a heroin addict and although you keep getting adviced to run away from him as quickly as possible you keep exposing yourself to him and his many women and unhealthy manipulative behaviors. The martyr thing isn't going to get you anywhere, but hurt.

You are your own worst enemy right now. It literally does not matter why he is doing what he is doing. Save yourself. Get out.

I say this meaning absolutely no disrespect whatsoever, based on your posts I don't see where you took control of yourself in this situation nor removed yourself nor got him help. I don't see that in this post either. I see a possibly young girl, upset and hanging onto the pendulum swings of a heroin addict and although you keep getting adviced to run away from him as quickly as possible you keep exposing yourself to him and his many women and unhealthy manipulative behaviors. The martyr thing isn't going to get you anywhere, but hurt.

 

You are your own worst enemy right now. It literally does not matter why he is doing what he is doing. Save yourself. Get out.

Well I did...I moved across town, lied about not having money and constantly called rehab facilities and sought sponsors for him. I always said screw it when he didn't fall through and he would pull me back in with the same thing and I would do it all over again until he crossed that line with me. He spent months trying to break my walls down...he made a few holes but they were patched quickly. I'm a human being sorry I unknowingly fell in love with a sociopath. Empathy is a curse and a gift. I tried to help him, because he asked me to and he needed and it wouldn't be just for him. That's just what I do. There is nothing wrong with wondering did I do to deserve this. And I'm 24 "kitten93"

Also I'm a gemini I do have anger problems only when I'm provoked. I've said mean horrible things to push him away to save me from myself and ranting while angery don't help either. It may seem like I didn't try but I did I fought for his sobriety constantly I refused to believe he was a sociopathic monster but I learned the hard way

Well I did...I moved across town, lied about not having money and constantly called rehab facilities and sought sponsors for him. I always said screw it when he didn't fall through and he would pull me back in with the same thing and I would do it all over again until he crossed that line with me. He spent months trying to break my walls down...he made a few holes but they were patched quickly. I'm a human being sorry I unknowingly fell in love with a sociopath. Empathy is a curse and a gift. I tried to help him, because he asked me to and he needed and it wouldn't be just for him. That's just what I do. There is nothing wrong with wondering did I do to deserve this. And I'm 24 "kitten93"

There is absolutely something wrong with wondering 'what did I do to deserve this' it's literally the wrong thing to do in this situation as I said earlier:

The martyr thing isn't going to get you anywhere, but hurt.

You are your own worst enemy right now. It literally does not matter why he is doing what he is doing.

He's like a burning house. Completely engulfed in flames and instead of you going and calling the fire department, you're running into the flames with a Dixie cup of water.

You do not have the ability to help him. He is a drug addict, he needs professional help.

You are 100% right it is absolutely not your fault you fell in love. It's not your fault you are wrestling with these emotions. Like you said you're human. But you are consciously choosing the Dixie cup route, every time.

You come out with burns and you're crying for help saying 'these burns hurt what do I do?' And You have the entire neighborhood yelling 'please stop, call the fire department or at least save yourself and stop going into the inferno but you keep on like the little engine that could, you keep going in with that Dixie cup.

Save yourself. Do not worry about him. Do not focus on his actions.Get out. Heal yourself. Maybe seek counseling.

The worst thing any of us could do right now is hand you a second Dixie cup. Please don't dwell on his actions. Focus on changing yours.

Yeah, whenever anybody threatens suicide, they use it to get attention. Most people who kill themselves write a note and just does it. But threatening it made you come running over. It's a form of manipulation. He enjoys manipulating you, getting you to come back. People also play on another person's sympathy and a lot of women will try to coddle their boyfriends and making excuses. For example, him sleeping with his drug dealer and he apparently wanted you to see it. Ugh. You're old enough not to put up with a controlling drug addict. Cut him off. Don't talk to him. Delete him from your life.

Rational, emotionally-stable, healthy guys don't do this, OP. These are the actions and words of a highly manipulative individual and not what most men represent.

As for you, well, your zodiac sign has absolutely no bearing on your own behaviour. I am a Gemini too, and anger problems are not part of who I am. You need to take some accountability, too. No, it's not your fault he is a jerk. But you do need to identify why you kept going back for more when you knew there was no future with him. Being empathetic is very different from being codependent, and I am guessing the latter is causing bigger problems in your life than the former.

Yeah, whenever anybody threatens suicide, they use it to get attention. Most people who kill themselves write a note and just does it. But threatening it made you come running over. It's a form of manipulation. He enjoys manipulating you, getting you to come back. People also play on another person's sympathy and a lot of women will try to coddle their boyfriends and making excuses. For example, him sleeping with his drug dealer and he apparently wanted you to see it. Ugh. You're old enough not to put up with a controlling drug addict. Cut him off. Don't talk to him. Delete him from your life.

So he wanted me to see that to manipulate me? Why when he got what he needed, I don't ask to ever come back he always draw me in just to hurt me. He knows we could never be together

Because he loves the power he has over you; he doesn't love you, though.

Sorry to hear this. Cut off all contact and delete and block him from all messaging and social media. Never over invest this much and try to fix or mommy anyone. Examine your motives for trying to "rescue" him. Only he can do this:

I fought for his sobriety