Try to connect... or Stay the Course

My GF and i met online and chatted every night for several hours and said "good night" and in the mornings for breakfast. we had already planned a trip to meet and bought tickets before we had an argument in May. During our time together, i would notice that FB Messenger would indicated that she had previously been online but wasn't replying to my mssgs. i researched similar stories on FB and people said dont trust the time stamps. OK.. maybe I didn't do that because it caused a few arguments and finally our final argument. I sent her apologies on two different platforms where we talked. NOTHING. i followed up with emojis the next few days. NOTHING. I decided to go NC to see if that changed anything and I sent her a HEART emoji 2 weeks later. NOTHING. After I saw that she had seen the HEART but did not respond ... I UNFRIENDED her on FB. After a few months and I saw her twitter feed... with MEMES about holding on to people you care about and not waiting forever for somebody who does not value your company. But, there is no guarantee those were about me. For all i know, she was playing another dude and got dumped. And on my birthday, she retweeted a saying that "it is better to be with somebody in the distance far away than somebody close who doesn't value your company".

Perhaps UNFRIENDING sealed our fate. If so... I own that; but i was just trying to get her to realize that if my apologies were not worth a response or an acknowledgement then I am not going to beg. Perhaps she wanted to see more effort.

Advice??

SocialMedia can be tricky. You never know what's going on. Are you and her Lond-Distance?

Look, don't pine over someone you didn't even met! You don't even know if your first date would have gone well. You should look for girls who live in your area and meet them as quickly as possible so you're not in this situation where your imagination and fantasies run wild. 60% of communication is non-verbal and it's extremely important to meet the other person to see if there's a spark. Stop looking her up in social media and look for someone else.

For the life of me I don't understand two people having relationship conflicts when they have never even met.

On top of that - if you were closely monitoring my online activity, making assumptions and challenging my integrity, I'd block you.

Sorry. . but true

yeah.. 1000 miles apart. but realistically, i never thought an online relationship could be as good or better than "real". instead of spending time watching tv together... we were actually talking and communicating. i would do it again.

In the day and age of social ffriendships, that was all this relationship was, a friendship that took place online. While there may have had feelings for each other, there was no together, because you never actually met. The problem with online friendships such as this is you just don't know what is going on outside the time you spend together.

Sure, if you can get by without physical contact and all you need is someone to talk to, online friendships could be the way to go. But even with the occasional visit, stating at each others privates over skype, it's still not a real relationship.

LOL. i understand the online nature is still viewed as a bit freakish ... but when you look at all the other threads on here, the relationships have a digital element to them. whether it is about texting and blocking or somebody texting their ex. all relationships are hybrid-online.

The thing about meeting/talking to people online is you always can be super creative on what you say, how you punctuate for instance my love interest always puts question marks in front of sentences with a space in front like this ?. I know its him talking when I see that , there are other flirting things as well like winks, smilies, and so many other things that you can do online. If you unfriended thats a BIG thing. SHe was probably really offended that you stopped communicating with her/ being her friend. She probably looked forward to seeing you on facebook

this is my first post here. i really appreciate the time you guys have taken to read it and for the supportive and even the raw feedback. it feels really genuine, authentic and heartfelt ---- even thought it is only "online".

You cancelled your travel plans, I hope.

You cancelled your travel plans, I hope.

uuuh.... yeah.

I wouldn't try to connect. Meet someone closer to you

Sure, I agree that many relationships these days have a social media portion and can be partially online, but if you have never met, then you aren't together. An LDR works between two people who have been together for a while and need to for work or similar. Starting a relationship Long Distance is very difficult.

And yes, there are many threads here about hybrid and online relationships, but this is predominantly a breakup and relationship problem site, so it is hard to compare there.

Sure, I agree that many relationships these days have a social media portion and can be partially online, but if you have never met, then you aren't together. An LDR works between two people who have been together for a while and need to for work or similar. Starting a relationship Long Distance is very difficult.

 

And yes, there are many threads here about hybrid and online relationships, but this is predominantly a breakup and relationship problem site, so it is hard to compare there.

Thanks KEYMAN

I'm sure there are many virtual relationships...but don't you want to hug the person you are in a relationship with? Go places together? Have meals together? Cuddle on the couch while watching a movie?

I just don't get preferring typing on a keyboard to actual physical interaction.

Anyway, perhaps SHE met someone in real life. A 3D boyfriend rather than a virtual one. You could do that too, and I bet you'd find it much more rewarding.