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Dziapanka

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So my boyfriend is 18 and I'm 17, we've been together for almost 2 years and honestly we love each other. Lately (ft the past 6 months) we've been fighting a lot, but every time we'd make up, even tho it does leave both of us a bit hurt I guess. Some time ago I moved to where used to live during childhood so we barely see each other, but we're always texting and having phone calls every now and then, I always send him nudes when he asks or do other stuff that he wants to see since I trust him a lot so I don't have a problem with it. A few days ago we had a fight, he basically told me that he always satisfies my needs both mentally and physically, and that I don't do any of that-which is not true?to be honest it really hurt me and now I don't know how to feel about everything, especially cause we've had some really deep conversations and he admitted he'd want to have a threesome and all that and now I just feel horrible because I'm doing everything I can to satisfy him and then he tells me that??i don't know what to do

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He needs to stop looking to you for his happiness (that's called codependence). Your job is not to make him happy! You can love him, you can be kind to him, and you can trust him -- but if he's determined to be unhappy there isn't a darn thing you can do about it.

 

Please don't have a threesome -- my goodness, you are so young for that to even come up as a possibility.

 

I highly, highly recommend breaking up if this pattern of sexual escalation, fighting and general dissatisfaction continues.

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I'm 22, so recently I was your age and I remember what love back then felt like. I also remember when people used to tell me this good old line "when I was your age" or "you're young, let him go there's plenty of fish in the sea" so I won't tell you that. Cause I know you won't listen.

 

But what I will tell you is that chances are that if you're arguing NOW, your arguments will only get more complicated later on as you guys discover who each of you really and truly are in life.

 

If I were you the a step back, stop listening to everyone's advice around you and try to not lie to yourself. Think about what is really good and bad about your relationship. There's a lot more fun and chances of love ahead of you if you let go now. Or there's this one person for the rest of your life which can only mean that what bugs you about him NOW will bug you 10x more 5 years down the line.... good luck. Follow YOUR instincts and heart.

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If he wants a threesome, let him go and find one - that's if he manages to get hold of two willing people - just tell him he won't be doing it on your time. Then end things with him, for your own sanity.

 

When you feel horrible in response to your partner, it's time to take another look at the whole relationship - especially if he's trying to tell you that YOU'RE in the wrong.

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The recent move, his voicing his dissatisfaction and now pressuring you for threesomes suggests that something else is going that he may not be telling you.

 

I too remember being your age and hated it was someone older that myself told me that my relationship wasn't mature or real.

But it's true. The rate in which your mature and change in your late teens, into to your early 20's happens at lightening speed.

What made sense last year, is a different game today. In the end you two will be such different people.

 

The likelihood of you two growing together rather than apart is remote, if even possible. Add in the distance this relationship is likely doomed.

My guess is your boyfriend is getting distracted and discontented. I would leave now before it gets worse.

 

Often times a partner will intentionally behave badly in hopes that you'll be the one that leaves. Just something to think about.

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