You Deserve Better: What Steps to Take When Love Rival Leaves You Feeling Lost

It’s normal to feel lost after a love rival steals away the person you cared for. But don’t let your heart be circumscribed by someone else’s actions – instead, resolve to make a new beginning, and shape your destiny from within. Kicking off that journey can be hard, but with the steps outlined below, you can gain the necessary courage and strength to emerge from it on the other side, each day filled with renewed hope for the future.

Breathe

In the aftermath of loss our first instinct is to plug up the overflowing bitterness and sadness. But harboring such powerful emotions can be just as unhealthy as bottling them up, so let yourself acknowledge the intensity of the emotions, without being overwhelmed. Use your body’s natural healing tools - deep breaths and rhythmic heartbeats - to dissolve the stream of troubling thoughts and start to visualize something else.

Express Yourself

Speaking up isn’t always the easiest thing, especially when you are feeling vulnerable. It could be anything from jotting down your feelings in writing, to joining a support group, if there's one nearby, to bottling up all the sweet sentiments you longed to share and then gentling releasing them. Don’t worry if you can’t find the right words to say or the exact feelings you are experiencing - nobody needs to have it all figured out before we start expressing ourselves anyway.

Allow Yourself to Grieve

Grief can be messy, chaotic and uncomfortable. Building on our first suggestion, allow your body to express and move through the process at its own pace, without fear or uneasiness; any emotion which feels too large, give it some space to becoming more manageable. Holistic healing practices like yoga, tai chi and daily walks can help you to cope and work through grief without draining your energy, enabling acceptance and optimistic expectations.

Honor Your Heart

Taking ownership of our heart is what will help us to turn around the hurt of lost love. If unexpected news or a person’s behaviour shock or surprise us, trust your instincts, tringing to an openended conclusion and validate your boundaries. Be mindful of others’ feelings, maintaining civility, while honoring and protecting your own.

Take Time out

Too often in times of sorrow we try harder to carry on in order to superimpose sense and of structure over the turbulence, instead of allowing ourselves to simply be. As the day progresses more and more tasks accompany that stress and can lead to burnout. Instead avoid multiple commitments, take time out to assess how the task could be completed it in a more lightweight and efficient way or if it needs to be delegated.

Understand You Can Find Love Again

Love may have left you feeling empty, but remember that hope is never gone. Rather than saying goodbye, allow your passion to enter a new chapter in your life story and look towards finding, as well as growing, love again.

Love rivals, no matter how hard their visit, bring incredible lessons with them by teaching us to discover our strengths, re-find ourselves and allow us to develop into stronger, better individuals. You deserve better, so don’t let hurt consume your life, rather embrace it and take the chance to grow, develop and come out the other side with a greater understanding of who you are and how to protect yourself in the future.