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did my girlfriend mess up tonight?


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Today my g/f invited me to her house to celebrate her brother's birthday with her family. I politely declined because I had a big quiz today (and 2 left to do this weekend). She came to my house to visit before leaving to the family get-together, and before leaving, she asked me "when do I come back tonight?" I asked her if she was fine coming back at around 9 PM and she said she didn't mind (I even told her that it'd be ok if she preferred to see me tomorrow instead of today, but she insisted she didn't mind coming back tonight). I said fine - I figured I'd be done with the quiz today at 9.

 

9 PM came rolling around, then 10, and I didn't hear from her all night. It wasn't until 10:30 PM or so that I finally spoke to her on MSN Messenger. She apologized and said that she assumed I had come to realize she wasn't going to come after all since I didn't receive her call.

 

I think what she did was kind of inconsiderate - she basically left me hanging. If she simply would have called to let me know she wasn't going to come, I'd be happy with that.

 

Do you guys agree?

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I think what she did was kind of inconsiderate - she basically left me hanging. If she simply would have called to let me know she wasn't going to come, I'd be happy with that.

 

Do you guys agree?

 

Yup. I hate it when someone I'm dating does that. It's happened to me a lot. Oh well. You should let her know it bothers you.

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why would she even tell you she's going to be there at nine, and insisted even after you told her it would be ok if she didn't...so that then she wouldn't show up.

The least and polite thing to do is to call and let you know...

i think thats just rude..

she was probably annoyed at you deep down because you didn't go to her family get together, so she thought this was a good way to get back at you in some weird way?

it was very immature of her, and really rude.

She should be less selfish and realize that you didn't go because you had this quiz, not because you didn't want to go.

I mean it's obvious she's not happy with you in some way if she would just leave you hanging without contacting you.

I think you should try to talk to her, and tell her to be honest with you and tell you if there's anything wrong. Just let things out in the open, because it's not good for you both to just leave this at that, it could create some kind of resentment on both of you parts..

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Yeah, she was wrong I hate it when people do such stuff.

You need to ask her (in a nice way) to call you next time. Explain to her how it makes you feel when she does what she did last night.

I guess when she finds out how hurt you were by her actions she'll start behaving different.

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9 PM came rolling around, then 10, and I didn't hear from her all night. It wasn't until 10:30 PM or so that I finally spoke to her on MSN Messenger. She apologized and said that she assumed I had come to realize she wasn't going to come after all since I didn't receive her call.

 

I think what she did was kind of inconsiderate - she basically left me hanging. If she simply would have called to let me know she wasn't going to come, I'd be happy with that.

 

I agree. I think your best bet is just to tell her, "Hey, i was waiting for you. In the future, I would like the courtesy of a phone call if you aren't going to be able to make it." And drop the subject, so she knows it isn't up for debate. Hopefully that should be enough but if she keeps doing this, it may be time to find a new gf.

 

Guys rarely do this to me anymore, once I've become more firm. I don't like the "uh, i'll roll around sometime" type of date. I like having concrete plans and if they aren't sure when they can come over, I suggest we meet on a different day. One guy pretty much stood me up, sent an e-mail 3 hours before our date to cancel. He didn't give a reason at all, just said, 'tonight isn't going to work for me." Obviously, I didn't respond to that e-mail, thinking he would call me soon. i didn't hear from him! A few months later, he just contacted me out of the blue, like nothing ever happened, and boy did I tell him off! I said, hey, if you are going to cancel, give me a phone call, not an e-mail! sending an e-mail a few hours before hand was very rude. If you wouldn't do that to your clients or your co-workers, why do it to a woman you are dating?" he apologized but I was already over him.

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Yes she said she would but didnt show, maybe she was busy or something, she apologised and considerate enough to do so, what more do you want.

 

 

SHe could have picked up the phone and called, I think that's all he asked for. A simple 2 minute phone call, "Oh sorry something came up and i'm not coming tonight" Would do i'm sure. She had time to get on MSN, she had time to call (Atleast that's how I feel)

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yes, decidely rude... if she does this more than once or twice after you told her not to, then one should wonder where she is... people who do this are not caring about the fact that you may be sitting there waiting for them, and can use it as a starting place to cheat (i.e., if they meet someone interesting at a party, but were supposed to leave earlier to see you, they will just blow you off and continue on with that person, then make up an excuse and/or lie later to cover for it.)

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you didn't try and call her? maybe she didn't want to bother you knowing you have lot to do since you expressed that to her.

 

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