I'm really pissed at my boyfriend. Is it mean to dump him right after Vday??

[Siriana]

Well done!

You're single.

Yupi!

That guy was starting to scare me!

[n83]

Me too syrix. *shudder*

[beaglelover_06]

I would have to agree with some of the other posters here. Your bf should of known to at least get you a card or some flowers for VDAY. As far as breaking up with him, I don't that you should but instead talk it over with him on how upset you were with him not caring to show how special you are to him on that day. I also think that he was BS when he said that he bought you something for Christmas and it never came because of some unknown reason.

[beaglelover_06]

oops...I did not read your last post but good for you for breaking up with your bf. I wish you luck in finding a much better one and plus one that treats you well.

[extra_crunchy]

Hey N83, glad it's over with!

 

I had a quasi similar experience. My (ex) bf tells me 2 days before vday that he was going to get me flowers but they were too expensive to send (LD). I told him that was fine and he shouldn't spend a lot, but something would be nice like a card. And instead of doing that, he starts talking about how valuable his time is - as if he can't take the 20 minutes to send a card! Then he does the typical male rant about how he shouldn't have to show his love for me on this particular day...which I could be okay with if he was the kind of guy who randomly does sweet things, but not so much...I can't complain about xmas though, that was a nice gift... But anyway, we broke very civily after that, and decided to be friends. Friends, however, apparently means talking to me exactly like before we broke up, flirting and all... So a few days ago I told him I needed some time - he told me I was melodramatic for that. Whatever. He's made a few attempts to talk since then, but since it hasn't even be a freaking week, I've ignored them...oh men.

 

Anyway, I'm glad you came out unscathed! Keep us updated if anything else happens...and enjoy being single - I'm trying to!

[ghost69]

breaking up was probably the best here. so n is single now huh? if that is really her pic, dang! should have no problem finding another guy.

 

.........................................................................................................................................................................................

[n83]

Anyone else in a bad relationship wanna dump their crappy bf with me??

 

I'm glad I dumped him. The more I think about it, the more I realize how bad he was in other ways. Like.. subtly talking down to me, acting arrogant (even his family members thought he acted like a p#!%k)..

 

if that is really her pic, dang!

 

what pic.. the avatar?? noooooo that's not me that's a pic of me uploaded to this post, with my friend Derek

 

so you can see who's been doin all this b!+chin

[jh1581]

Anyone else in a bad relationship wanna dump their crappy bf with me??

 

I'm glad I dumped him. The more I think about it, the more I realize how bad he was in other ways.

 

Hi n83,

 

I just broke up with my bf tonight. I'm actually pretty hurt about it, but I know I deserved better.

 

Good for you for being so strong and getting out of it the way you did. I wish I could be more like that! =) I know that in time, I'll make progress and can look back and see how bad my ex-bf was in other ways too.

 

And anyway, I saw your pic. It was definitely his loss

 

((HUGS)) Jenny

[EvaGina]

And anyway, I saw your pic. It was definitely his loss

 

lol

I know, huh? talk about beauty and the beast!! (not that looks should matter in love and all, but WHOAR!!)

[n83]

Hi n83,

 

I just broke up with my bf tonight. I'm actually pretty hurt about it, but I know I deserved better.

 

Good for you for being so strong and getting out of it the way you did. I wish I could be more like that! =) I know that in time, I'll make progress and can look back and see how bad my ex-bf was in other ways too.

 

And anyway, I saw your pic. It was definitely his loss

 

JH!! I have been following your thread about the breakup.. I think you did the right thing girl!! But more importantly, I hope you feel that way too, even if it takes you some time to get over it.. and we'll all be here if you're feelin down

 

I know, huh? talk about beauty and the beast!! (not that looks should matter in love and all, but WHOAR!!)

 

LOL Eva - That guy in the pic isn't my boyfriend.. he's a good friend of mine..

that's actually one of my better pics.. I usually look tired in most pics lol

[EvaGina]

man, i feel super mean now

[n83]

Hahaha it's okay I won't say anything..

[TheFoglifter]

... I don't know that I want to be with someone that is too dense to even know that they should just get me a stupid card. I shouldn't have to have tons of mini discussions about every mundane thing.."

 

You are projecting your values on to him without considering that he may feel differently. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Women like you want the world to work on your terms and think everyone "should know" how things are done.

 

Here is an analogy I always use, lets see what you make of it.

 

Suppose hallmark created a "give your man a blowjob day". Suppose this craze swept the nation, and it was held in the same esteem as valentines day. Obviously there are going to be some people out there who will use the same counterarguments that presently exist for valentines day:

 

- Its a commercial holiday made up by a corporation.

- I show you I love you 365 days, not just one

- I think its stupid.

 

If such a day existed, most guys out there would probably want to observe it.

 

Now consider that maybe your man feels the same way about valentines day as you would about blowjob day. Maybe he DOESN'T think that a day created by a corporation warrants some huge dog and pony show.

 

As someone said before -- if he is showing a lack of effort in the rest of your relationship than his standards are too low or yours are too high. If however, he does very well and is reliable, then you need to decide whether your material wants would be satisfied better elsewhere.

[need2bme]

"give your man a blowjob day"

 

OMG! I almost fell out of my chair.

[ghost69]

i would use that card everyday.

[n83]

Now consider that maybe your man feels the same way about valentines day as you would about blowjob day. Maybe he DOESN'T think that a day created by a corporation warrants some huge dog and pony show.

 

I'm not sure why my previous post was deleted, so I'll try again. And this is a repeat of what I've been saying all along:

 

If he didn't think it was a big deal, he should have said so. Like maybe a "I'm not too big into Valentine's Day, so you don't have to get me anything".. Instead, he put in a Gift Request and didn't reciprocate or even attempt to provide an explanation.

 

I'm sorry, that's pretty childish and selfish. Then he dared to show up at my doorstep a few days later telling me he was upset that I blew off his bday dinner the night after VDay. Then he blabbered something about not being good at Valentine's Day. Frankly, if he can put in a freaking gift request, he can improvise something for Valentine's. It's totally ridiculous to tell me after the fact that he's "not good at Valentine's Day" or some such horse poo. If he thinks he can ruin my Valentine's Day and then expect me to go out of my way for him AGAIN on his bday, he's got another thing coming.

 

Anyhoo, for those who want an update, I dumped him and haven't spoken to him since. And I'm much better off for it

[facade]

It's that he KNEW she was getting him something for valentine's day and at the point that he got the present, knew that she had driven through a storm to get it and to get it to him, and he didn't even acknowledge having the same thoughtfulness for her.

 

I thought he knew she was getting him something for his birthday, not Valentine's Day? Did I miss something?

[Daligal83]

He knew about both. She discussed both presents with him.

[facade]

ah...there's a lot to be said for reading all of the posts in a thread