CoCo2009 Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 I didn't contact him today hopefully I can move forward. Link to comment
Eleanor Rigby Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 My moment passed... *sigh* bracing myself for the next wave though. Link to comment
Thomazz Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 day 5. nothing more to say. Link to comment
jaylh25 Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 12 now.. I sold the house yesterday.. i bought it but she put a hell of a lot of work into renovating, decorating etc.. should i drop her a note saying ive sold it? she's living with another guy now but we'd been in almost constant contact until i told her i couldnt do this anymore with her 12 days ago.. apparently she found out last night and was telling friends im "just washing my hands" of her!! i then got notified she'd deleted me off her blackberry messenger list and ym, msn this morning. think sometimes she forgets shes the one who left and is living with someone.. anyway.. I just dont want her slaggin me off to people saying i couldnt even be bothered to tell her id sold.... thoughts guys? Link to comment
philove Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 12 now.. I sold the house yesterday.. i bought it but she put a hell of a lot of work into renovating, decorating etc.. should i drop her a note saying ive sold it? she's living with another guy now but we'd been in almost constant contact until i told her i couldnt do this anymore with her 12 days ago.. apparently she found out last night and was telling friends im "just washing my hands" of her!! i then got notified she'd deleted me off her blackberry messenger list and ym, msn this morning. think sometimes she forgets shes the one who left and is living with someone.. anyway.. I just dont want her slaggin me off to people saying i couldnt even be bothered to tell her id sold.... thoughts guys? Well if she knows already I wouldn't bother. To be honest you have every right to be cold and distant if she is the one who dumped you. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 3 Feel alright. I deactivated my FB profile again. I did not wake up thinking about her, which was good. I'm waiting on her to contact me. This part of it is fun, like cat and mouse or Chess even. She's really good. She called, got me sucked in and then withdrew. I was really good too. I gave her no ego boost or feeling that she could have me at anytime. I feel reflective. My 37 days of NC were good for me. Seeing her was even better. I got to see her flaws. Being broken up and not in contact made me realize she wasn't this super-model goddess that I had in my head. In many ways, our meeting made me realize that even if we didn't get back together, I'd still be ok. Link to comment
LemonCheesecak Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 8 I'm feeling ok right now, but in a couple of hours my mate that stayed with me this weekend is gonna be leaving and I'll be on my own. But I've got plenty of cleaning and cooking so that should keep me distracted. Gonna try and get a group of people together for our favourite pub quiz tomorrow night too. Its all about keeping busy, day by day Link to comment
philove Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Day 23 I have now come to the realisation that it's not her fault for the way she is. She has had a tough life and I think that's what's caused her to be so messed up. I actually shed a tear last night just out of pity for her and I honestly hoped she could be happy. I do still love her but she is no longer my concern. I tried to help her and she pushed me away so I just hope she will get better. I think I reached another milestone and that's all thanks to an amazing, understanding girl I have been seeing. I just hope these constant obsessive thoughts of my ex will soon fade away. Link to comment
Ixtapa Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 At this point I just want to forget that he exists. I was talking to someone yesterday who told me that even though doing NC is great, I am still spending too much time obsessing about him....and that he can probably feel that and at this time it is only pushing him away (its an energy thing...and those who believe in the power of thinking and prayer would understand what I mean). She advised me to actively cut emotional ties with him by consciously trying to avoid all thoughts of him (not cultivating memories, not talking about him, not writing about him). So I guess this will be my last post on here for a little while...and hopefully this will speed up my healing. Good luck to everybody on the challenge On a side note....I do think that I really needed the support of this forum for the first month of NC. Its been 36 days now and I just want to try a new approach .... Link to comment
BrokenheartUK Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 In many ways, our meeting made me realize that even if we didn't get back together, I'd still be ok. Congratulations John, that's a huge milestone to reach. Things can only get better from now on after that kind of revelation! Link to comment
Eleanor Rigby Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 Feeling grouchy today about how I was kicked to the curb. Jerk! Link to comment
troubbble Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 So I decided to take the challenge. Day one. I actually haven't talked to her in 6 days, but in order to follow the rules I will make today day one. I miss her a lot. Its been 3 months since we broke up. She instated NC for 2 months then she called me last weekend, but not to take me back. Just to tell me how much she missed me and loved me and how we couldn't be together. So I told her we can't talk. This time NC is my choice. We'll see how it goes. I feel terrible. Link to comment
CoCo2009 Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 I didn't contact him today either I feel so bad Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 So I decided to take the challenge. Day one. I actually haven't talked to her in 6 days, but in order to follow the rules I will make today day one. I miss her a lot. Its been 3 months since we broke up. She instated NC for 2 months then she called me last weekend, but not to take me back. Just to tell me how much she missed me and loved me and how we couldn't be together. So I told her we can't talk. This time NC is my choice. We'll see how it goes. I feel terrible. good job, man. You'll be ok. Welcome to the challenge. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 I didn't contact him today either I feel so bad Better days ahead, CoCo. Keep strong. Link to comment
_ash_ Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 day one..again its been great he is finally off my mind, some of the time before it was every second! so its the end of day one and i have a class tomorrow. hopefully i can actually pay attention now! im going to start doing well again...why should i fail my college classes? he wont care..so i might as well do good for myself. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 You two speak your own language. Who knows what you guys were talking about? The answer is simple though: If you still like him, go No Contact. If you really want to be his friend, then looks like everything is all good. Link to comment
CoCo2009 Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 Better days ahead, CoCo. Keep strong. thanks, I feel like I have nothing inside, no heart or anything. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 thanks, I feel like I have nothing inside, no heart or anything. I felt the same way when I lost my ex-fiance. I wanted to give up everything I had worked so hard for. I didn't think anything was worth doing without her. But a breakup - especially one that is long term - can force you to re-evaluate who you are. You have to find out what truly makes you happy independently of your ex, Coco. It'll come with time. Link to comment
mushmouth Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 I just hit year 2. HA! To be honest, I did a lot of work on myself and realized I had been selling myself short with the girl who broke my heart. It was also helpful to meet women along the way that possessed real woman qualities. Anyway, just signing on for the first time in almost a year since a friend of mine who has been married for something like 11 years is going through marriage problems. I recommended the site to him and figured I should just see if it was still the same. This is a great site. Its so full of love. Thanks to everyone for putting your hearts out there and also your advice. Link to comment
brazilgirl21 Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 Day 28 - I can't believe I've come so far. Link to comment
JohnGalt Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 Day 28 - I can't believe I've come so far. You're doing great, BG. We all know how tough this is. It is so painful. How you holding up? Link to comment
ToodlePip Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 3 weeks and a half. Getting my mojo back. Holding stares with other girls. Not got the confidence to do anything about it yet, but a deep gaze and a smile is more than I could do before. I still hold a candle for her but I can't stop moving forward, for myself. Looking forward to my therapy session tomorrow - will be the 4th of 5th one and I feel like so much more makes sense in my life now, it's almost as if the more I learn about myself, the less I think about the relationship breakup. Can't reiterate it enough, focus on you and the rest will come. Link to comment
Thomazz Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 day 6. I think. still nothing more to say. its getting easy Link to comment
ToodlePip Posted March 16, 2009 Share Posted March 16, 2009 Having said that, one thing that's trotting around my mind is to check ehr facebook page (that I've hidden from the news feed). I'm 99% sure I won't cos I know it's not good for me, but I suppose I AM curious as to what's happening to her. I haven't updated mine since the breakup so I know she won't have a clue what I've been up to, unless she finds my Twitter account (and even then I only really use that for professional banter so not much insight for her there either). I feel ready, but having done it 3 weeks ago I know that it'll hit me like a ton fo bricks and I'll feel sick, regardless of whether there's anything to see there or not. So I absolutely won't do it. *sits on hands* Link to comment
Recommended Posts