LilBear Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Starlette - blocking someone means that you are preventing them from contacting you, thus you're able to get over them and heal faster. I blocked my ex, and what did he do? Contact my sister instead. Believe me, it is insignificant, talking to your friends and all is insignificant. If he's got something to say, trust me he will find a way to say it. Sam - I have two MSN messages from my ex: On Saturday night after I unblocked him: (9:53 PM): dear doctor (9:53 PM): its been a while since we last met (9:53 PM): how are you? i hope you're doing fine And on Sunday night: (11:24 PM): wish tht at least u can still talk to me What am I supposed to respond to that? NOTHING! Hope that helps Link to comment
LilBear Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Day 37! He nudged me on MSN and sent me his trademark, traditional post break-up message "are you there" Blah... Link to comment
lady00 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Day 37! He nudged me on MSN and sent me his trademark, traditional post break-up message "are you there" Blah... LOL...he's beginning to look a bit pathetic, no? Each time I see you post about a new IM he sends, I think to myself "when is this guy going to give it a rest?!" Link to comment
papalazarou Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 143,000 views and over 6000 posts. Wow... Link to comment
Irish Jax Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 I have reached DAY 8!!! I am proud of myself and notice the great difference from this time last week. I still think about him and still want to call him. But the reason i want to call him has changed drastically. Last week, it was because I wanted him back. This week, it has to do with the fact I have realized how unfairly he treated me and that he is an idiot and I just wish I could tell him that. What holds me back is that fact that calling wont do me any good and it will give him some sort of sick satisfaction that he believes I will call him. When you start to think about things, you start to open your eyes and realize that breaking it off actually is the best thing and you see the person as they really are and not how you saw them in the relationship. Day 8!!! Link to comment
bostoneric Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 for all those of you who are getting the "are you doing ok? how are you? etc etc" contacts from your dumper/ex... remember its their way of easing their guilt for making you feel crushed. its their way of keeping some control over the situation. my ex got upset and asked why i've been weird about avoiding her calls/emails, when i finally told her that the reason i'm not returning her calls or answering her emails was because I am truly heatbroken and I need my time to heal. she finally understood but also acted strange about it saying why am i being weird about contacting her?... its like we have the ability to just be friends so easily? I dont think so. i'm going on 3 months now of really NC and I still feel like crap on a regular basis. Link to comment
lady00 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Day 20something. Had my weak moments for sure but have amazing friends so I'm working it out... Link to comment
wyrllish Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Day 5 Hate Sundays and thought about her and what she's up to/thinking about most of the day even while I was busy. Still wanting her to call for the right reasons and know I must never contact her first if I have any chance, still hard though Dreamt about her for the 3rd time in two weeks today. This one had a nicer context though(last one had her and her new guy in it...), believe she was asking me about my personal life. Link to comment
Mock Chop Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Okay, I emailed my ex for the final time last night. I am making no further contact with him. Our break up didn't make much sense to me, but I know and accept the contribution I made to it happening. I am working very hard on myself to ensure I become a stronger more confident person. I'm in therapy for issues of my past (narcissistic mother), and see how I projected her behaviour, her type of 'love' onto my other relationships. It's a tough road, but one I need to walk down. Until he contacts me to discuss things properly, I'm making no further contact with him. So day one it is. Link to comment
starlette08 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 mockchop - good for you. i did the same thing, i sent the final email and told myself that was it. i didnt contact him anymore after that. it's been over 2 weeks of NC for me. i came to conclusions that he wasnt going to respond to any of my emails, so ive stopped. Link to comment
toughtimes15 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 so i'm trying this whole NC thing but the problem is, the ex keeps texting me. its actually starting to piss me off a little bit. if he is really trying to get in touch with me, pick up the damn phone and call. so i'm going to say day 5 NC b/c i can't help it that he is contacting me. Link to comment
starlette08 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 bostoneric - you said you didn't want to talk to your ex because you were heartbroken. im wondering if my ex is going thru the same thing. he hasnt returned any of my calls/emails for two months. ive recently started telling myself he is either really hurt, or doesnt give a *&^% about me anymore. how do you go from talking to eachother everyday for 3 years to no contact whatsoever!!? Link to comment
lady00 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Losing it here...wanting to speak with him...probably will...I suck at life Link to comment
starlette08 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 don't do it! how i keep myself from picking up the phone is thinking about how stupid i will feel after when he doesnt answer. Link to comment
lady00 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 I texted...he responded. We are going to talk later. He is such a sweet human being. Urgh. I am not feeling so great (physically ill today unfortunately and I think that is adding to my confusion about life). Link to comment
wyrllish Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 I texted...he responded. We are going to talk later. He is such a sweet human being. Urgh. I am not feeling so great (physically ill today unfortunately and I think that is adding to my confusion about life). What did you text? Good he responded I know if I texted my ex she would respond too...which makes it extra hard for me to resist. Good luck when you guy talk later. Link to comment
SamT Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Argh guys, she txt me asking how i was....after a day of going back and forth wether to text back i did... I explained that i needed time off and that the space between us should let us forget about the past etc. I said miss her but i need this time to get myself together.. she text later saying, thats good, and its for the best! I just dont think she understands what i mean! she also said she missed me.. And now shes unblocked me on Msn, i was Appearing Offline. But decided to go Online to see if shed start a convo.. she hasnt. But i just know that shes expecting me to! arghh Whyd do i have to test my strength so.. Link to comment
SamT Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Argh guys, she txt me asking how i was....after a day of going back and forth wether to text back i did... I explained that i needed time off and that the space between us should let us forget about the past etc. I said miss her but i need this time to get myself together.. she text later saying, thats good, and its for the best! I just dont think she understands what i mean! she also said she missed me.. And now shes unblocked me on Msn, i was Appearing Offline. But decided to go Online to see if shed start a convo.. she hasnt. But i just know that shes expecting me to! arghh Whyd do i have to test my strength so.. Link to comment
sara1 Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 I texted...he responded. We are going to talk later. He is such a sweet human being. Urgh. I am not feeling so great (physically ill today unfortunately and I think that is adding to my confusion about life). I completely relate to this as i'm feeling ill today and can't stop thinking about the ex. It's been over 30 days and for that i'm really proud of myself for not making any contact but at the same time i'm sad that he has not once tried to contact me. It seems like he has forgotten me or at least doesn't want to look back. For this reason, it's sad. I mean we never argued with the exception of the break-up conversation. I guess we were just at the wrong place in our lives. Link to comment
LilBear Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Losing it here...wanting to speak with him...probably will...I suck at life It's hard to succeed at NC the first time around. I didn't my first few times for my ex would always try to make me break NC. It's not that I initiated anything. However, the last time I broke NC, after a week, he was being really mean and so hurful that I just had to change my number and embark on this NC journey. Sooner or later you'll come to a point where you realize that you've been subjecting yourself to hurt for far too long and that it's unhealthy and has to stop. Argh...dreamt about my ex again, not as a person, but that he's added me to an MSN conversation and if I'm mistaken his gf is in that convo too. You cannot believe how pathetic is getting. I mean you have a gf, stop bugging me already. Link to comment
LilBear Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Sam, the best thing for you is to not respond to her until you heal completely. Because it will just make you feel awful if she doesn't respond. It's good that she understands your needs anyway. My ex never does - he just doesn't get it. You don't owe anyone any explanation for going NC. Link to comment
gee Posted February 26, 2008 Share Posted February 26, 2008 HI all. I'm coming aboard! I miss her immensely and still love her very much...today will be day 9 of NC. She broke up with me 2months ago. She told me to leave her alone and don't call her at all. I left her alone and I did 2 weeks of NC until she broke it. She confused me! She initiated contact always I was nice enough to reply. I'm itchy to contact her and having hopes of getting back together, but i won't. I did all of the chasing before I hope the tables turn this time around..crossing my fingers, but I am learning to just let it go and let God take care of my problems. If it's His will he will reuntie us again! Link to comment
lady00 Posted February 26, 2008 Share Posted February 26, 2008 We talked for a long time and he re-explained how he just wasn't feeling it between us and he couldn't give any kind of logical reason for it and that I had all the qualities he was looking for, and still he just didn't have those feelings. Oh, well, that is what I expected. It still hurts to hear that, even after so long but I have been trying to move on, date others, just haven't met anyone like him, yet. Link to comment
starlette08 Posted February 26, 2008 Share Posted February 26, 2008 you guys are so lucky to know that your ex will respond to you. ive texted my ex several times at the beginning with sad faces, and i miss you.. and please talk to me.. and i've gotten nothing back............ and it's been two months. i've even tried emailing and calling - yet nothing. i can't even explain to you how much this hurts. he told my friend he gets sad when he sees my msgs, so why can't he just respond. how can he have SOO much self control? how do you go from talking to your best friend every single day to not talking at ALL? how can he do this to me? it's tearing me up inside. i would DIE for him to say ONE thing to me right now. Link to comment
gee Posted February 26, 2008 Share Posted February 26, 2008 Starlette, I know how you feel! Having her as a best friend and then...gone..! We stopped contact because "she met someone" it hurt me so badly! She told me that the day after valentines and I had spoken to her on V-day and I poured my heart out to her she listened to me. I'm just confused and just hope she realizes what she has done. I miss talking to her and most of all holding her. I see here that going to complete NC (and it is easier said than done) that maybe someday the other person will react. Just pray about, just pray about it! Have faith! Link to comment
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