Are MOST men Minute Men?

[Stu147]

Two caveats here

 

(1) It's not entirely a misconception; I can largely control the timing of an orgasm (from a few minutes up to a couple of hours of continuous intercourse) by thinking of things (which is very handy ).

 

(2) You're right about SSRI's, but for many men, they will do too good a job in this regard, and make them frequently impotent (while on them; not a permanent effect), so they should be used only in relatively extreme cases.

 

You're right what you say about SSRI medications. Minute-man? Sheesh, I should be so lucky! Some nights it can take me forever! Damned medication!

 

p.s. I was never a 'minute-man' before the meds either, but at least I wasn't the 'hours and hours' man I am now!

[matius]

hi i think u r daiting the wrong guys...

try to find some new friend / friends

 

I agree with this comment for the original poster... who would make a very bad mate for someone with this problem. I get the sense that you probably make the guy feel smaller or less like a man then have the capacity to understand that it's a condition he probably doesn't want to have.

 

So, find someone who can run your marathon. Nothing wrong with that. But at the very least, if you can recognize the difficulty these 'minute-men' are facing, these are people just the same.

[Dako]

You're right what you say about SSRI medications. Minute-man? Sheesh, I should be so lucky! Some nights it can take me forever! Damned medication!

 

p.s. I was never a 'minute-man' before the meds either, but at least I wasn't the 'hours and hours' man I am now!

 

Wish I had SSRIs when I was in my 20s.

Wham bam thank you maam.

[fredthebread]

Yeah be careful what you wish for, if he is the kind that goes on forever, you can wind up dry and sore. I had this happen with a couple of girlfriends. What I do is give her an orgasm with other parts of my body - tongue, fingers etc. then have my fun and if she comes again great, if not, she had hers so she can't complain as long as she stays wet. But I have had a good few relationships (I am 31, not a player) and there are all sorts of women out there and there is no hard and fast rule or secret book you can read. You have to train your man and your man has to train you into how you each work. A lot of it is in the mind. One girlfriend I had would nearly get an orgasm just driving round the red light district (a fantasy she had). So our foreplay before she would let me near her was to drive round the red light district and get home before she had gone of the boil Led to some crazy driving and we sometimes had to pull in Anyone else with crazier foreplay stories? Might help these girls out!

[littlelissa23]

No, to last ten minutes is definitely not the norm. My last tryst was with a man who you'd think was competing in a sexual triathalon. LOL! Not only could he endure, the damned thing wouldn't go down!

[matius]

My last tryst was with a man who you'd think was competing in a sexual triathalon. LOL! Not only could he endure, the damned thing wouldn't go down!

 

That sounds normal...llello!

 

 

To the ones mentioning SSRI's... which ones?

[fredthebread]

No, to last ten minutes is definitely not the norm. My last tryst was with a man who you'd think was competing in a sexual triathalon. LOL! Not only could he endure, the damned thing wouldn't go down!

 

I think I might have dated you? lol

 

But seriously if he is going on too long, you have to get him warmed up before it goes in. If he goes on too short, he has to get you warmed up before it goes in. Its called foreplay folks !!!!!!

[Cooperstown]

Generally I'm right around 20-30 minutes without a condom and god knows how long with, it really depends on positions to. But if the anticipation is up who knows, there are things you can do to help your endurance and stamina. For starters worrying about your lovers needs before your own is huge.

[Adzy]

If you can spend the time on the foreplay, its much better.

 

She can orgasm while having sex if you absolutely tease her beforehand.

 

And for the guys who orgasm too soon - try distracting your mind.

Generally, an orgasm is a result of both mental and physical pleasure.

 

Next time you feel you are going to orgasm too early, start trying to work out the alphabet, backwards. =P

 

The distraction helps immensely.

[regular joe]

Ten minutes only if it's a quickie (not including a little foreplay) and it is always ladies (multiple times) before gentlemen. I can't even have an orgasm until I make my girlfriend orgasm a few times. Hearing her getting off is what brings me over the edge. Sounds to me he doesn't know what buttons to push and levers to pull. You need to help him out or else keep missing out. If you don't tell him something is wrong, he'll keep on doing what's he doing. ( no one's complaining, why mess with something that's working?) Show him what you like and don't be afraid to ask him to do something. Maybe add some toys. For example, Some nights my girlfriend likes one position better than another. Then the next night it maybe the other way around.( woman's prerogative.) Communication inside and outside the bedroom, always leads to the most mind blowing sex you will ever have.

[Dako]

Or think of Margaret Thatcher...

[rocklovinggirl]

My husband lasts about 5-10 minutes the first time around but then we can go a second time and sometimes this can take from 30 min to 3+- hours.

My past lover usually lasted about 15-40 minutes sometimes he lasted hours, as well.

[matius]

And for the guys who orgasm too soon - try distracting your mind.

 

But don't get too frustrated when this does nothing for you.

[real2]

Masturbating alone can get me off after about 5 minutes, yet penetration (with ultra-thin condoms) usually takes 30-40 minutes if not more. Time flies, but it's not a good thing if you simply want to get off sooner rather than later.

[plyometrics]

I have no problems "lasting" a long time. How long?? I don't know I don't ever time myself but 20 minutes is not a big deal. I am 47 years old (don't really look it) and can tell you that many guys problems in this area (as well as ED) is because of poor health. Nutrition stinks. No exercise. The wrong exercise. No breathing control. No muscular control of the right muscles. Chinese medicine would say that the internal organs just kind press and sag and have no energy anymore. Yes, some guys have a problem with oversensitivity. If they do then..... breathing, visuazation, muscular control are all worth a try. Stress (all work and no play) is one sure way to get stuck in this rut. The right kind of exercise. Whole foods. Breathing exercises. "better control" of the sexual muscles have all worked for me for years. One of these days I will have to take a poll with my male clients and find out if I have helped them do the same. ( I design exercise and nutritionl programs). Once again if you go against nature you will eventually lose. If you go with it's flow and do the right things then you reap benefits. So to the ladies out there find a guy who takes better care of himself and you could be on the right track.

 

 

Robert

[matius]

breathing, visuazation, muscular control are all worth a try. Stress (all work and no play) is one sure way to get stuck in this rut. The right kind of exercise. Whole foods. Breathing exercises. "better control" of the sexual muscles have all worked for me for years. One of these days I will have to take a poll with my male clients and find out if I have helped them do the same. ( I design exercise and nutritionl programs). Once again if you go against nature you will eventually lose. If you go with it's flow and do the right things then you reap benefits. So to the ladies out there find a guy who takes better care of himself and you could be on the right track.

 

So joining a gym and finding a personal trainer/nutritionist would be your suggestion? Sorry man, doesn't sound grounded in my reality.

 

As far as I know I'm in good shape. For years I've played soccer and have been a long-distance runner. Eaten probably as well as anybody else. I know a lot of people who eat crap 24/7 and smoke but can last just fine.

 

Breathing, muscle control, the start/stop technique, anxiety/stress reduction are all stock answers from any one of a million websites on PE out there. They simply cannot be applied to every case of premature ejaculation.

 

In reading hundreds of posts, articles and other stories over the years, I've really never heard of anyone saying that "once my breathing was controlled, my PE was gone."

 

Same with stress, do you really believe that someone struggling with PE their entire life has been stressed out and riddled with anxiety through every sexual encounter - and also through solo-masturbation?

 

Perhaps there are some benefits to those things for some people, but to just throw a blanket statement out there for the ladies is a bit off-centered.

 

I noticed you said these things have helped you for years? Did you overcome PE, or are you saying they just helped you in general?

[Ervin79]

ahah, why then women sometimes have orgasm, sometimes not, the women who have orgasm like men do, lol they are probably inexistent. I guess condoms are bad for pleasure. Men should practice some abstinence to increase the sexual energyl.

[matius]

ahah, why then women sometimes have orgasm, sometimes not, the women who have orgasm like men do, lol they are probably inexistent. I guess condoms are bad for pleasure. Men should practice some abstinence to increase the sexual energyl.

 

What are you talking about?

[JadedStar]

Ladies and Gentlemen!

 

 

I'd like to know what you will say to this question. I want to know if MOST women are with or have dated men who don't last longer than 10 minutes. I mean is this the norm? And to the men, why is it so hard for a man these days to go the long haul. Don't we deserve more than a few minutes? Or is it just married sex that turns into a boring minute fest? Come clean ladies. Is it possible for a man to last longer than a few minutes...does it mean they are not trying...or is it really that hard?

 

 

To the two men on the planet who don't last two minutes...congrats you are in the MINORITY!

 

I think it has a lot to do with the attentiveness of the man. My husband is in his 40's and lasts longer than most 20 year olds...why? Because he IS INTO it and is as into pleasing me as he is himself.....

 

Now there are some men who really CANNOT help it when they don't last very long. On the flipside it can be a compliment to the lady. He may be so hot and bothered and not as in control of his sexual organ and just can't help it. I think that men who are more experienced are able to sustain longer as they learned tricks thru out their life........my husband will actually slow down when hear "nears" orgasm because he does not want it to end so soon. It takes practice for a man to be able to master this....

[happywithher]

i have been known to last anywhere from 5 minutes to two hours without finishing

not to mention doing it multiple times in one night

[philosophia]

my sex sessions usually last 4-5 hours with some breaks thrown in

[matius]

I think it has a lot to do with the attentiveness of the man. My husband is in his 40's and lasts longer than most 20 year olds...why? Because he IS INTO it and is as into pleasing me as he is himself.....

 

I don't think so. I don't think men like this would classify themselves as having PE, or acknowledge that they have a problem with it if this were the case. I think not being into it can mean many things, but not something that causes premature ejaculation... a condition, not an attitude.

 

I think that men who are more experienced are able to sustain longer as they learned tricks thru out their life........

 

Such as...? Not everyone is David Blaine I suppose. Lots of so called 'tricks' exist online, and they've proven worthless.

 

How many tricks can there be? It's been 10 years worth of a problem for me. I too can stop right before I go, but that doesn't matter when you start & stop to the point it's frustrating for both people

 

Just remember there are biological factors at work in a great number of individuals with this problem. It's imperative that people stop perpetuating ignorance by just assuming it's all psychological (not a stab at you JadedStar).

 

People with this issue will come on the boards and think their issue is all mental and will feel defeated thinking... "why doesn't thinking about baseball statistics slow me down like everyone else." Ridiculous.

[matius]

my sex sessions usually last 4-5 hours with some breaks thrown in

 

That's hardcore man. Must be some sore parts afterwards at that party.

 

All I can say is bottle that stuff man; make a fortune.

[philosophia]

well ok, it's more like

 

1 hr of sex then

1 hr of sitting around talking

then anothe rhour or sex then

another hour of sitting around and then another hour if we're up to it

[Cardinal]

I am with matius in that I think PE is far more physiological than psychological. Older men have changed (and generally lower) hormone levels. That is a big driver in being able to last longer.

 

But so is experience. 20+ years of consistent sex can teach a person a lot I would assume. Add that to a person that is really 'into it' and chances are they will learn their own body well enough to make lasting longer a reality (with the help of lowered sex hormone levels due to age).

 

I can do a lot more now at 27 than I could at 18. And most of it is physiological. I have about 1-2 minutes warning most of the time before I blow. That is a lot of control time to work with. At 18? No chance in hell could I do that.