turning lights out during itimacy

[Yvette84]

So why does it drive you guys SO crazy when us girls want the lights out??? I mean if it was pitch black yeah, but I just want dim lighting! I'm WAY to insecure to show myself in broad daylight

why do guys get SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO upset at this? alot of us girls just have insecurities.

[dnozzle]

Men can tend to be very visual. We like to see you. It turns us on. We realize that you are insecure about your bodies, but we think they are beautiful and do not see your imperfections at all.

[Dako]

The men-are-visual angle puzzles me. I love looking at women, I'm a graphic artist and still... I like dim lights, candle light or blacklights.

[eriko]

Well, you're a rare specimen..

[Boughs]

hahah. I don't mind either way. I really like the dim lights tho at times... with the light highlighting her hips and her breasts and she rides me in the night.

 

*dreams*

 

Oh wait what were we talking about?

 

As long as the lights let me see what I want to see, i'm all good.

[LostInMyThoughts]

Well, it's like watching a porn, only you get surround sound, and force feedback as well.

 

Ditto about us men being visual.

 

I can understand turning off the lights for a while, but after you two have been getting intimate, why do you hold your insecurities?

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

huh, I wish.

 

My boyfriend hates having sex with the lights on, he thinks he is fat (ARGH, he is NOT....sigh) and whenever it looks like we're about to have sex he'll say

 

"Uhh....can you turn the light off, honey?"

 

Sigh!

[tRiKTa]

huh, I wish.

 

My boyfriend hates having sex with the lights on, he thinks he is fat (ARGH, he is NOT....sigh)

 

Lol well it seems as though gender is irrelevant and that it just depends on the individuals preference. Personally, I don't mind having the lights on but I prefer it when the lights are dim not off. It sets the mood especially if you got nice music playing in the background, just had a romantic meal mmmm nice!!!! I think dim lights is one of the smaller things that help differentiate the act of 'making love' and having a 'shag' or a 'quickie.'

[Aurian]

Full on blazing lights are a bit scary, but have you tried candle-light? Its such a soft sexy glow and it shows enough to be sexy and let you see what's going on without showing every (imaginary?) inperfection.

[Dako]

Dang. I must be a chick.

Checking....nope, still male.

Over the years, I liked the champagne, candles and music while getting busy. Maybe porn is a factor. Shaving and stage lighting may be the new thing.

I'm not hip.

[itsallgrand]

Yvette, are you saying that floodlights are out of the question?

 

Myself, got the womanly bits, and can't say I care one way or the other.

Candles and soft lighting are great for romancing and dancing.

Black light is great for looking like a hot brown skinned chick for a night.

Full blazing light is good for when you are feeling naughty and want some monkey love.

 

Fluro lights are just horrible. They should be banned.

[constantine]

We have sex during the day and, well, it doesn't bother either one of us.

 

At night, we just turn the lights off and it still doesn't bother either one of us.

[Lady Luck]

It doesn't really make a difference to me. Lights or no lights, I don't really notice once "it's on." lol

[Weeblie]

I love dim lighting. Everyone looks good in that kind of light. I look slim instead of bony and he looks muscular instead of flabby.

[Lady Luck]

Agh, I have the whole bony thing goin' on too. Sucks in certain circumstances.

[Day_Walker]

I like to look at the whole package, I dont need the lights completely on but it says something to me when a girl is so insecure that she is not comfortable enough with her body to have in any kind of light.

[Deviant_Kate]

So why does it drive you guys SO crazy when us girls want the lights out??? I mean if it was pitch black yeah, but I just want dim lighting! I'm WAY to insecure to show myself in broad daylight

why do guys get SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO upset at this? alot of us girls just have insecurities.

 

Well, I guess if confidence is a turn-on, then insecurity is probably a bit of a turn-off. And if someone is physically attracted to you, doesn't it stand to reason that they would enjoy looking at you, especially during an act that was inspired by that physical attraction?

 

Just let go and enjoy yourself. And take it as a compliment that he wants the lights on.

 

 

A random thought . o O (A rope light or a string of clear christmas lights around the bedroom creates a really nice ambiance and allows you to see everything without being under harsh lighting or risking a fire from candles...)

[jsx730]

or risking a fire from candles...

 

It's so worth the risk though! Easiest way to set the mood =)

[Aurian]

Christmas lights eh? Very festive

[Straightj06]

i love dim lights and darkness. I just got these tube light things out of the loft and set them up. They like have some really good settings for getting in the "mood". Like slowy fade in an out . . . for foreplay . . . then really fast flashs for sex. God i love gadgets

 

I also love it pitch black, because you can be touching them and do what you want really, and they wont really know what will come next, so its like a surprise to them. Either way i love it

[onmyownagain]

I always think, making love in the dark allows your other half to think of someone else instead of you, how inscure am I.

[amtjrtcet]

I like to have at least 3 candles lit when we're making love. Its almost as bright as a lamp, but sooo much more romantic.

[Straightj06]

I always think, making love in the dark allows your other half to think of someone else instead of you, how inscure am I.

 

I didnt think of that, im so keeping the lights on now !!

[sddeaston]

I always think, making love in the dark allows your other half to think of someone else instead of you, how inscure am I.

 

Hmmm. Its not like they are with YOU at that time or anything.

[Aurian]

Well, there are pros to being in the dark too. It lets you focus on your other senses for a change - touch, smell, hearing... Its just a bit sad if you have it in the dark ALL the time because you're scared of your body...